Don't go to prison

by aszecsei

Published March 11, 2008

In Poetry

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I was writing limericks and got really, really bored. So I made this one up. :smt093

There once was a kid with brown hair
Who dragged puppies down to his lair
He tore them in half
With a maniacal laugh
Before deciding to come out of his lair.

He had been missing since two thousand two
Since then, his face had turned blue
He found sweet ol' ma
And tore her apa'
Before making her into a stew.

The cops found him and put him in jail
There, they thought, his ripping will fail.
And burglars and rapists
And murderers and fascists
Their parts piled into a pail.

Comments & reviews · 9
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RoryLegend
Review
RoryLegend wrote a review Review · Mar 20, 2008

Haha, very nice..one thing..I disagree with LittleLoveableSock.
I don't think you should have taken the 'a' out of "Before making her into a stew." When I read the poem the first time I actually reread the line adding an 'a' just before stew and it flowed a lot better for me. Not sure why, it just did. I do enjoy this poem though, torturing puppies and all. It is psyco cute lol.

~Rory Evelyn Legend

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Livinginfantasy
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Livinginfantasy commented Comment · Mar 19, 2008

I like the rhyming flow!
I found this to be very entertaning, especially the brutal abusement of the poor puppies.
You're quite the jokester aren't you?
-Livinginfantasy/Stella

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KookieKatie
Review
KookieKatie wrote a review Review · Mar 19, 2008

First, of all, that is freaky in the best way possible. Like, creepy, make-grown-men-cower-in-their-covers-at-night-when-they-hear-a-noise freaky.

Only one thing: fascits doesn't rhyme all that well with rapists. Find another rhyme maybe?

I love it. A++!! (You will get the third + when you fix the rhyme.)

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Rei
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Rei commented Comment · Mar 12, 2008

I'd love to see what you come up with when you're not bored. I'm sorry, but torturing puppies. . . not good material for poetry in my opinion.

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bamagirl11
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bamagirl11 commented Comment · Mar 12, 2008

um...
i think this thing is the sickest i have ever read
thats not a good thing!

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MADD94
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MADD94 commented Comment · Mar 11, 2008

DUDE YOU'RE F#CKED UP! I LOVE IT, ITS HILLARIOUS

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Corvin Vandra
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Corvin Vandra commented Comment · Mar 11, 2008

Dude, this is sick, in every sense of the word. Hilarious, witty, but completely random. Keep it up, it's just my kind of poem. I can't really crit a joke, can I? That'd kind of ruin it...

~Corvin Vandra

LoveableLittleSock wrote a review Review · Mar 11, 2008

There once was a kid with brown hair
Who dragged puppies down to his lair
He tore them in half
With a maniacal laugh
Before deciding to come out of his lair.

He had been missing since two thousand two
Since then, his face had turned blue
He found sweet ol' ma
And tore her apa'
Before making her into a stew. - rid of 'a'

The cops found him and put him in jail
There, they thought, his ripping will fail.
And burglars and rapists
And murderers and fascists
Their parts piled into a pail.

I don't really understand the last part of the poem( the last line really), but I really liked this limerick a lot. The flow is really good and the rhyming is flawless. Just rid of that "a" in the second stanza and the flow would be just perfect.
PUPPIES?
HE KILLED PUPPIES?
That's so mean!
KEEP WRITING!



Maybe we're all just complex human beings with skewed perceptions of each other.
— Ventomology