How does someone remain strong when all they want to do is fall apart? How can they believe that someone will be there to pick up the pieces as they lie scattered, no judgment in their eyes? And how do they trust that even once the pieces are put back together that they will ever be whole and new, with no cracks?
I want to believe its ok to be scared, but how can when everywhere I turn there is someone who is telling me no, its not ok to be scared because its all his fault. How can i believe in my hero when everyone I know is a villain trying to strike him down? How can I hold onto that last shred of hope left when everyone is trying so hard to pull it away?
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
This is amazing. Good job.
I do believe that you wanted there to be an I in here "but how can when everywhere"
And you forgot the space between "can" and "I" here "How canI hold onto that last"
A lot of the time the author of a short piece is told that their work would be better longer, most of the time it's just that, the piece would be better if it was longer. Very rarely do find a piece that needs to be longer. Myself, I am starting to believe that this is one of the pieces that needs to be longer. But I may be wrong, it might simply be that I feel so strongly that it would be so much better if it where longer, that I am no longer qualified to see if it needs to be longer, or simply would be better longer.
Even though I think it needs to be longer, it is still an amazing piece. I could really feel the emotion behind the words, and even, in places, relate to them.
I hope very much that one day I will read another of your works, and hopefully, it will be published. Because I believe that you really have a good chance at getting published one day.
So with all that said, I shall bid you farewell now. Keep up the good work!!
Ohhh i love this one. I love how the questions flow from one another, kind of like they were answering the questions and then asked one of their own.. Chain reaction is what im thinking of. This would be a good poem, but all the same that is my opinion not yours.
Keep Writing! Hawinay
thanks