The Keening

I agree with the previous poster, you should either take the word 'ancient' or just use some other.. less 'raw' word instead.

I find your way to divide into lines rather unique, I like the way you leave the half of the sentence for another line and it doesn't sound weird, I'm talking, for example, about the first paragraph.

I also would liek to point out that both your beginning and end of the poem stand out, and beginnign and the end are the most important parts, be it a poem, a story or any document.

Nicely done. Creates an "everyday magic" image in my head.

I enjoyed this. I read it smiling to the end, loving the personification, the descriptions - ever-inventive - and the tight feeling encapsulated here.

The ancient portal to the garage
returns to its doorway with
a long, prolonged groan, an aching
of its weary joints.

the house is of middle age, and
we who inhabit it are lonely:
no ghosts have chosen to board and breakfast
with us yet; and when they do stop by,
I'm sure they'll be pleasant and festive,

With the inward closed behind me
I pass through on the narrow road;
two vehicles, a car and a van,
squeeze me sideways: for I walk as the tightroper does,
nimbly over the strait of concrete–
beyond the shadow of the raised garage door (the house is dutifully smiling)
my feet carry me into light, and I am so utterly penetrated that I become a piece of stained glass.