Hey, Tiana here for a review. Now I see this is one of three poems that you've done, I will review the other two after this one.
Your metaphors are spot on, using cracked lightning to describe laughter... 'cackling' is really interesting, it's almost an oxymoron; cracked lightning is almost a derogatory metaphor and cackling is happy most of the time. So to use them in conjunction with one another is truly magnificent. HOWEVER.
I don't like the word cackle. It's one of those words for me like the word "Moist"; this part of the poem I grimaced at since it just doesn't fit it.
Other than that, everything else is so good and I love this and I'm onto the next two right away!!
Thanks and have a lovely day - Tiana
Points: 1343
Reviews: 56
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