Pieces Prologue

My name is Death and I’m a twin to my brother Derek. We both are a lot like each other and well, nothing else to say, we are just the same. Yet being the same is nothing that someone could ask for. We both share the same fate, a fate that chooses if we live or die today. We are nothing a like when it comes to fighting and sparing in battles. Our weaknesses are different from other but barely recognizable to a person that doesn’t know me and my brother. We are only 16 year old teens sadly… Well you will know more soon enough young one. For now sit back and enjoy the story while it’s still a happy time in our era. Enjoy.

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User avatar
kaitlyn
Review
kaitlyn wrote a review · Mon Sep 13, 2021 5:35 pm

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.

Anyway let's get right to it,

My name is Death and I’m a twin to my brother Derek. We both are a lot like each other and well, nothing else to say, we are just the same. Yet being the same is nothing that someone could ask for. We both share the same fate, a fate that chooses if we live or die today. We are nothing a like when it comes to fighting and sparing in battles. Our weaknesses are different from other but barely recognizable to a person that doesn’t know me and my brother. We are only 16 year old teens sadly… Well you will know more soon enough young one. For now sit back and enjoy the story while it’s still a happy time in our era. Enjoy.


Okay...looks like this is someone trying to sort of narrate a story to people..although I wonder exactly what audience this is meant for cause apparently this person is a sixteen year old teen but they refer to readers as "young ones". That makes for a bit of an awkward statement there.

Umm...diving into things here though, I find it kind of hilarious that one person is named literally Death with a capital D and the other person is just straight up Derek....which is such a common and normal name. The way things are described it looks like both Derek are Death are in fact connected to the whole concept of life and death and the whole package that usually comes along with having a character named Death. There's definitely a few very interesting sounding points there...and I love the direction that this story appears to be trying to go in.

So yeah, this is rather short and sweet, but I think it does an admirable job of summing up some mysterious characteristics and there was only that awkward sounding thing there..but ya know...for the most this is pretty nicely done. :D

Aaaaand that's it for this one.

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry

User avatar
Picklesole
Review

This is very intriguing, though honestly there's not much to review here. I mean, you're talented at saying what you have to say in a few sentences but I didn't really get a clear picture of Death's personality in that, even if the name itself brings up insinuations about his personality (he's a guy, right? Try to make that a little more clear). Overall though I did think this was interesting, and I want to know what happens next! Let me know when you have chapter one up. :D


-Picklesole :D



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