The Hounds of Autumn
Autumn’s hawk flies free,
Shredding the rain.
Each inconsequential fleck of water falls,
Unmissed,
With nary a ripple into the ditches.
It clings to my hair,
My gloves,
My boots.
A coat of mithril draped over my overalls,
Taken from the halls of Autumn.
The cold gnaws at my fingertips,
The wind sinks its teeth into my bones,
And the frost breaths on my feet.
Walking down the tunnel of trees,
The wind keeps in step a little way behind.
It breaks into a run and whirls past,
Now pursued by a horde of wild dogs.
The hounds of Autumn blow past me.
They pluck and tear
At my overalls.
It is not the cold at my fingertips,
The frost at my feet,
Or the wind in my bones.
It is the freezing jaws of the dogs.
They hound me across the fields,
Baying in my ears,
Howling through the treetops,
Slithering through the grass:
All the while dragging Autumn himself
In his chariot of rotting wood.
The scraps of rain swirl with the dead leaves.
Even at home, Autumn rides at my back.
His mad hunt
Rattles the glass in the windows,
Stirs the fire in the grate,
And gallops through the crack under the door.
The hounds of Autumn
Ride this evening.
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Canary word: Present
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I very much liked this piece of work you've done, the narrative style isn't normally my first choice to read but I do have to say that this seems very much inspired. I enjoy the similes - well how you described Autumn to be like hounds.
My favorite passage was;
"All the while dragging Autumn himself
In his chariot of rotting wood and long yellowed bones.
The scraps of rain, greasy and oily,
Sheen the windscreens of cars with opalescent tones."
It just made me think of an old man riding in a very old santa-like sleigh with hound-like reindeer pulling it along. I know, my imagery is horrendous but I liked the description. You told the story of Autumn very well - I think the girl in her overalls, I believe it was a girl, should be best at home rather than out in Autumn.
Write on,
~Writteninstone [Wisp]
Harro, Zerokelvin ^-^
First off, I love the title.
Second, this part-------
#000080 ">-------Made me think you’re talking about the coming of fall, and how it came in the place of spring (The rainy season)
My favourite passage:
#000080 ">
It was beautifully written! You have crazy skill and style. Keep it up
#00BF00 ">Charade--- <3
Amazing job with this poem! I didn't find anything i would change in this poem so well done! My favorite part wasn't actually a line, but the fact that you made Autumn masculine. Most of the time nature, or anything relating to it, tends to be feminine, so playing with that made me happy. Good job, and keep writing.
Hi,
as usual with poetry, I'll paste the bit which had most impact for me:
Walking down the tunnel of trees,
The wind keeps in step a little way behind me.
It breaks into a run and whirls past me,
No longer a person but a horde of wild dogs.
The hounds of Autumn blow past me.
It reminded me of a bit in The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson, only there it's of course not the wind, but invisible 'things'. Very fantasy this bit, even without the mithril, for which, by the way, hats off.