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It's Gray!!

by Zenith


I frowned at the uniform lying on my bed, as if continuous staring would change the bland grey color into something worthwhile. I stole a glance at the clock and decided to put it on anyway if I were to win this race against time. Or in a less dramatic sense, not get late on the first day of my new school. The reflection in the mirror froze me for a moment and made me wish in vain for the light blue of my former alma mater. Only in this dire moment did I realize, how homely and serene blue was. Not just the one I wore for twelve years of my school life, but all kinds of blue. The one that we find in the vastness of the sky, or even hidden in the depths of the ocean, from turquoise to navy, every shade there is, it's impressive how this color simultaneously catches our eye and yet let everything else stand out. A humble kind of beautiful, yes that's something I would ask for from everyone I meet today.

I found my mind wandering off further, wound up in this thread of thought as I looked out of the window of my school van on the way to school. Strange, were there always this many colors? I was awestruck by this new discovery of beauty that was here all along. All I had to do was shed off my self-imposed color blindness. The bright yet subtle sunlight after last night's unseasonal rain bathed everything in a golden glow. It struck me that if strength and warmth had a color, it would definitely be yellow. There is something extremely reassuring about it, like a half whispered promise that I'll definitely make my place in this new school. Along the way, my eyes trailed on the continuous outburst of greenery by the roadside, all remains of the last layer of dust lost with the sudden downpour. I found something seep into me quietly, possibly life, because I had always acknowledged green to be so alive. Like an unprecedented shockwave of will power coursed through my vein and I just knew I'll do my best today. I sneaked a quiet glance at the people sitting beside me, in a subconscious search of more variance. I wasn't disappointed, there were bags and bottles of all shades. Purple in all it's sophistication, red with an unmatched vibrance, orange unique in itself and pink as just a reminder of all things pretty. Funny how even after presented with the choice of the entire color palette, the school authority chose grey.The one shade that never made a difference, as dull and lifeless as it could be. But let's not get too judgmental about it.

The van stopped abruptly, I looked out to check if we've reached already, only to find one corner of the road blocked for construction. The driver slowly maneuvered the vehicle to the other side. My eyes fixated on the white newly painted sidewalk and the black color of the tar on the road, such an interesting contrast. Even these two shades made more sense to me, monotonous but radiant in their own rights. We could easily decipher the darkness and mystery hidden in black, the kind that draws us in. White, on the other hand claims purity, a wholeness in itself. As I was pondering over these thoughts, a drop of paint fell on the tar and kind of blended together to form a mix, somewhat a gray one.

Oh, I see now. A middle ground, that's what it is. Gray ain't pretty or assuring or lively because that's not what it's supposed to be. There are others to play those roles. Gray is supposed to be real. When our flaws and merit merge together to create one soul, it's gray. Our color. Something that ties every one of us, as a proud member of this flawed species called homo-sapiens. It's the color of the once white peace flag tainted with the black battle dust as we finally raise it at the end of a meaningless war. The black in reminder of the trials we have all suffered, and the white in hope of a better tomorrow, two opposite colors embraced together to form one gray.

When I finally reached my new school, I was consumed with an overwhelming sense of hope and security. I knew I would find acceptance in this new place. The school uniform itself proclaimed so, after all it's gray.


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71 Reviews


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Mon Apr 08, 2019 12:41 am
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FabihaNeera wrote a review...



This is a really well-written short story! I love how you took a simple idea of a character preparing for their first day of school and turned it into something that actually has a meaningful message behind it. The imagery in this was really well done - I could paint visuals in my mind throughout all of it.

There are a couple of grammatical errors that could make the story flow better in some areas. The line, "The one that we find in the vastness of the sky, or even hidden in the depths of the ocean, from turquoise to navy, every shade there is, it's impressive how this color simultaneously catches our eye and yet let everything else stand out" has a lot of commas... So, you can try splitting this into two sentences. For example, you could try placing a period after "ocean" and capitalizing the next word "from". I think this would make this sentence easier to read.

Overall, I really loved the idea and theme of this story, and I encourage you to keep writing!




Zenith says...


Thank you FabihaNeera ! I'll definitely try to make the corrections as soon as possible.



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Sat Apr 06, 2019 10:42 am
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4revgreen wrote a review...



Hey, Che here for a review!

I will just start of with any grammatical errors I spot or anywhere I think you could have improved the story, along with corrections :-) Then I will move onto all the things I loved about it!

not get late on the first day of my new school --> I'm guessing you meant "Not to be late"

The reflection in the mirror froze me for a moment and made me wish in vain for the light blue of my former alma mater --> In my opinion this would make more sense if you said "made me freeze" rather than "froze me"

The one that we find in the vastness of the sky, or even hidden in the depths of the ocean, from turquoise to navy, every shade there is, it's impressive how this color simultaneously catches our eye and yet let everything else stand out. --> I think this is a rather long sentence (something I am guilty of always doing myself) so I would suggest that after "ocean" you put a full stop (Period?) and then after "every shade there is" put a semi colon; it just makes the sentence seem more mature.

A humble kind of beautiful, yes that's something I would ask for from everyone I meet today. --> This might just be me being pedantic, but it would make sense for this to either say "something i will ask for from everyone i meet today" or "something i would ask for from everyone I met today"

Strange, were there always this many colors? --> I think this would have flown better if you had but "had there always been this many colors?"


I was awestruck by this new discovery of beauty that was here all along. --> Again, I think that rather than "that was here" it would sound better to have "that had been here all along"

Along the way, my eyes trailed on the continuous outburst of greenery by the roadside, all remains of the last layer of dust lost with the sudden downpour. --> I think rather than "my eyes trailed on" it would sound better to say "my eyes trailed across" or "along". And the sentence would flow better with "all the remains of the last layer..."

I found something seep into me quietly, --> I think it would sound better to say "i felt something seep quietly into me"

Like an unprecedented shockwave of will power coursed through my vein and I just knew I'll do my best today. --> I think this sentence would be better as "It was like an unprecedented shock wave of will power had just coursed through my veins..."

I wasn't disappointed, there were bags and bottles of all shades. --> Rather than the comma after disappointed, it should be a semi-colon

Funny how even after presented with the choice of the entire color palette, the school authority chose grey --> I think it should be "after being presented with"

The van stopped abruptly, I looked out to check if we've reached already, only to find one corner of the road blocked for construction. --> It would make more sense if after "abruptly" instead of a comma you put "and" and then after "already" you put a semi colon

My eyes fixated on the white newly painted sidewalk --> I would change this around and have "the newly painted white sidewalk"

the black color of the tar on the road, such an interesting contrast. --> Instead of the coma after "road" I would have a semi colon

Even these two shades made more sense to me, monotonous but radiant in their own rights. --> again, after "me" i would have a semi colon not a common

As I was pondering over these thoughts, a drop of paint fell on the tar and kind of blended together to form a mix, somewhat a gray one. --> The use of "kind of" is rather informal in contrast to the rest of your piece so I would cut that, and instead of "somewhat a gray one" I would change it to " a somewhat gray one"

Gray ain't pretty --> Like ChieRynn said below, ain't is too informal in contrast to the piece so I would change it to "isn't"

our flaws and merit --> I think it should be "merits"

Something that ties every one of us --> would make more sense to say "ties every one of us together"

The black in reminder of the trials we have all suffered, and the white in hope of a better tomorrow, two opposite colors embraced together to form one gray. --> I think it would make more sense to say "the black as a reminder" and same with white and then have a semi colon after "tomorrow"

The school uniform itself proclaimed so, after all it's gray. --> I would have a semi colon and then change "it's" to "it is" for a more impactful ending.

Woah, I'm so sorry for pointing out all of these little area's of improvement but no one would improve without it!

Now for the good things!! There was a lot :-)

I absolutely loved this story- the imagery was so strong and beautiful. The structure of the story was amazing- the way you wrapped up the ending to both reflect and contrast the beginning was amazing. There was areal deep meaning behind this that must be very close to your heart.

It was a very mature and poetic piece, something I think a lot of people would struggle to write or even comprehend.

I'm not sure what else to say, other than that this is one of my favourite pieces I've read on this website so far!!

Please, keep writing!

Regards, Che :-)




Zenith says...


I am really grateful that you actually patiently pointed out all my mistakes. Thank you for your review Che. I'll definitely try to make the corrections as soon as possible. Also, I'm glad that you liked it.%uD83D%uDE01



4revgreen says...


No problem! I always take more time looking for mistakes in a really great piece of writing, because when they're corrected it will be amazing:-)



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Fri Apr 05, 2019 7:26 pm
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ChieRynn wrote a review...



So this is the first review I've done in a long time, so bear with me. I wanted to find a short story to review since they're fun and I like to write them myself.

You did well in not straying from the general theme of the story. You began with a description of a simple gray uniform, expounded on it, and then in the end wrapped it up with a small closing paragraph that kind of sums up the whole story.

Color isn't necessarily something we think about all the time, but really the color gray does make you think drab and serious. I like how you described it as kind of a "real" color. Something that's not the white that symbolizes peace or light, nor the black that represents darkness. It's something right in the middle.

There were a few small grammatical errors that I picked out, but nothing too severe. For instance, you wrote:

"Or in a less dramatic sense, not get late on the first day of my new school."
Proper grammar would be to say, "not be late". Also, I would use "for" instead of "on", but I'm not sure if using "on" is technically wrong.

One thing you did was use the word "ain't". This is rather informal, and I wouldn't use it unless it was in dialogue somewhere.

Overall it was an interesting story. If you write more shorts, let me know! Keep up the good work.




Zenith says...


Thank you ChieRynn! I'll definitely work on my errors as soon as possible.




"Think of all the beauty still left around you, and smile."
— Anne Frank