Innocence leaves with every gash that opens
But I was never truly innocent was I?
The slick red lines pull me in
Like a boat stranded at water
It's such a beautiful and haunting sight
So deeply do I feel that I deserve the consequences
The shame
The stares
The scars
But the release is just too great
These little red dots
Or thick red rivers
They hurt
And so do I
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,247 Literary Works • 674,329 Reviews
What a wonderfully heavy read. This hits very deep for me, no pun intended. The imagery this invokes is overwhelming and this is written so smoothly. It’s a simple poem but it holds so much weight, it’s beautiful. I love the comparison of the thick red rivers as well, it feels very accurate. I enjoyed this short poem quite a bit.
Keep up the great work, and I hope you have a wonderful day/night!
Strange to review something that has just come out but here we go!
I really liked your poem and for once I immediately understood what it's all about even if I hadn't read your content warning. I'm surprised how calm the beginning is especially with the boat stranded at water since I imagined it would be much more turbulent. Also that the sight itself can be beautiful as well as haunting. Really like how your phrase that. And the last two lines are just sad. Thank you for sharing!
Of course, I love writing how I feel and thank you so much for reviewing!
heyooo, good writing! The adjectives you use are pretty creative, not ones i hear often. also, your writing style reminds me of authors like Edgar Allen Poe and Mindy McGinnis. some examples that remind me of them are phrases like "The slick red lines", as they sound exactly like something they would say. I will say that you for sure don't deserve to feel that way though, and if you need to talk, yk you can message me any time!
I'll have to read some things by them soon if they write like me, and I know I can talk to you anytime
thank you for reviewingg!!