I wish so many things. I wish my mom was still around. I wish you hadn't left. I wish I knew I would send this letter to you. I wish I knew where to send this letter to you. In the end, it might take up a permanent home under my bed...the place where all of your old letters are.
Remember when we were younger and you would write to me about what we would do once we were old enough to get married? Remember your first letter to me? It was so awkward. Remember when you told me you loved me?
Remember when you promised to stay?
I remember some of my letters to you. I had times where I just poured out a constant stream of feeling, showing my love for you. I remember when I told you my life story and the next time I saw you, you just pulled me into your arms and told me you cared.
Why didn't you reply to my last letter? You have confused me. What did I do to deserve the sudden scorn you give me? I don't understand. And then, you packed up. You left.
You left, Josh! You left! You didn't even come to say goodbye or explain... My heart is breaking!!!! I don't know what I did! How could you just leave after all the times you told me you loved me?!
Did you never mean it?
The least you could have done was give me a reason. A reason for why I am not important anymore. Did I say something bad? After all the things we went through together, you could have at least given me a reason for leaving.
Can you at least give me your address so I can send you this letter? No...nevermind. I have decided this letter will stay under my bed with the others. A reminder of the folly of being attached to someone.