Don't ask where this came from - I was trying to do my creative writing assignment, and all of a sudden, this came out of nowhere...
Faith in Humanity = Non-existent
People are bright, bright things
that like to burn each other.
I say that like I’m an exception,
but I’ve burned my fair share.
I came into the world kicking and screaming.
Mother says I tried to crawl back in to her -
apparently, I was rather attached.
I got quiet real quick, though.
It was plainly evident that I was stuck here,
and no amount of pleading would send me back.
More’s the pity.
Later, I learned that not only was I stuck here,
here was hive of scum and villainy filled to the brim
With wretched people whose existence
disabused me of my belief in karma.
I quickly decided that humanity in general
Defied all logic of Darwin’s theory,
And retreated to the sanctuary well-known
By all scholars and fellow cynics.
My books keep me sane and out of prison.
Without them, homicide is entirely justifiable.
And so, I think, with that sarcastic eloquence I’ve cultivated,
That if heaven had a key, I’d steal it.
It’d be small, gold, and easy to hide,
the lock matching it in delicacy.
Soft chimes would sound as I reverently turned my hand,
sealing a treasured goal away forever.
And just like that, I’d lock us all out of heaven.
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139,012 Literary Works • 672,397 Reviews
Wow. Just-wow. This is beautiful. I really like this piece, because it's true. Humanity is basically a lost cause, and all we do is lie, steal, cheat, and beg. We're selfish morons, and that's all we really are, under our coat of acting like we're brilliant. I love the fact that you add your birth into the poem, creating a rather drastic and dramatic effect. I loved this, good job!
~Prez. T
Here for a review.
I especially liked your ending because of how it was so negative all the way. Great intellectual lingo and references cited. There was a flare of the sort of hate in all, finely executed with your wording.
Here, it would be nice if you mentioned where 'here' is, though I know you mean to imply 'here' to the 'world'
You've mentioned 'was I stuck here' twice consecutively. The flow of the tone was off, though if that was intended because of your style of repetition to emphasize, then disregard.
I suggest changing 'that' with 'the.'
-This one was really my favorite lines!
Keep it up! Hope this helps
-Waltzing