Hey there! I'm going to type down my thoughts as I read.
If there are plots and all manner of secrets that travel only in certain circles on local and petty scales, then by observing these groups' motives for doing so in such small environments, can we then determine the likelihood of very similar coils of deception bouncing around inside the chief functions of Society's Higher Structures?
I have to admit, you lost me in the first sentence. And it's NOT because the topic is uninteresting. This sentence is just two long, and I couldn't keep up and focus on what it was saying. If you break this into two, or even better, three sentences, the problem will be solved.
However since by definition a conspiracy must be wrought in secret, any evidence is distorted or never discovered.
This was a strong and interesting point. There are so many 'conspiracy theories' from throughout history, but we just do not know what to believe. Therefore nothing is set in stone and they continue being theories.
...it will occur that rival cliques & clusters within the collection of co-conspirators Inevitably grind their wheels against each other.
I noticed that sometimes you have words capitalised in the middle of sentences. Unless you're Margo Roth Spiegelman, you might want to fix that. :p
Quantum physicists say that everything we see, and ourselves included, are merely blobs of mass glued together by intricate vibrational frequencies, or wavelengths.
This is a good length (though it's bordering on too long). Because it's a good length, I could focus on the content rather than how I read it, and I was intrigued. Watch your sentence lengths, because there are a few that are far too long. If it needs more than two commas (and you're not writing a list) I would suggest breaking it up into multiple sentences.
They laugh at the bible’s “impossible” accounts from the Top, so that their chortling will stain all the way down the sides to the bottom of society. But you never see anybody bring up another religion for mockery.
Two things. First, Bible needs to be capitalised since it's a name. Second is that you should back up your claim with some evidence because from what I've seen, other religions are frequently mocked. Do you mean in a certain way, perhaps? Some more info would be good.
The last thing I'll point out is that in an essay, your first paragraph should link to the last paragraph. These don't really link. In the first, people generally say what the essay is about, what their question is, etc. In the last, they answer the question, or sum up what they've talked about and present their conclusion. If you do that this was be just that much stronger. I did find it interesting though, so thanks for sharing. It is great food for thought.
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