Long before the sun sets,
A curtain of damp mist veils the city.
The rain’s bittersweet lullaby instead
Keeps me awake;
It paints the world in hues of silver
As I embrace its serenity
In the language of rain,
The sky weeps its wisdom,
And the earth listens.
These soft murmurs
Keep me awake;
Drops slide against the windowpane;
This is the language of rain.
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Canary word: Present
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,734 Reviews
review time!
Firstly:(things i liked)
I love the line
"A curtain of damp mist veils the city"
It's as if someone put a blanket of water over the city.
I also like how you attributed rain being bittersweet, as it can both be a miracle and an omen.
Secondly: (things i think could use improvement)
nothing much!
i really like your style of writing poetry!
signing off-
-Tea!
Thank you so much!
I really enjoy rainy days, it gives me a sense of peace of mind
It’s so beautiful and whimsical 😊 I love the soft feel of all your description, especially in the lines “The sky weeps it’s wisdom, and the earth listens.” It so perfectly encapsulates the almost sad, yet peaceful feeling of falling asleep to the rain. There’s nothing I would change; it feels like a song!
It’s so beautiful and whimsical 😊 I love the soft feel of all your description, especially in the lines “The sky weeps it’s wisdom, and the earth listens.” It so perfectly encapsulates the almost sad, yet peaceful feeling of falling asleep to the rain. There’s nothing I would change; it feels like a song!
It’s so beautiful and whimsical 😊 I love the soft feel of all your description, especially in the lines “The sky weeps it’s wisdom, and the earth listens.” It so perfectly encapsulates the almost sad, yet peaceful feeling of falling asleep to the rain. There’s nothing I would change; it feels like a song!
This poem was beautifully written. The describing words just pieced everything to gether perfectly. The sounds of rain being described as an lullaby. How the rain is keeping the speaker awake. But not like a bad type of being kept awake. A calming, relaxing form of being kept awake. It reminds me of a rainy day, those days you just stay inside and listen to the rain falling down from the skies onto the Earth.
Thank you so much for the review! That's exactly the emotion I wanted to convey through my words.
- WordWeaver1357
The alpaca has awaken from her slumber to feel the drizzle of rain dripping down her face. She saw this work and decided to leave a short review.
The overall aesthetic of the poem is wonderfully earthy and peaceful. The words used is delicate and sweet. Your style of writing evokes imagery very well so that the reader doesn't only see it through their imagination but also feels it. I think that's a great quality to have as a writer and I hope you can continue to hone it!
My favorite lines are these:
I find these lines simply creative and wonderful! These are also relatable to those who are pluviophiles (like me). Keep it up
This is alpacaboss, signing off.
Thanks! Nice to meet a fellow pluviophile