Neither docile nor timid thou art

by VivelaMusique

Published August 17, 2010

This is a free verse, very self-indulgent poem. Forgive me. Any thoughts about it?

Neither docile nor timid thou art.
Yet with your veritable tenacity you prevail
upon my consciousness; an insistence
in webbed corners and those always clean.

Oh, Thief of all Thieves!

You have robbed perfume from the flowers.
And suddenly I am a frequenter of a flat meadow;
once a mélange of scents, now muted by a breeze
that brings only the fragrance of my obsession.

Oh, Paradoxical Man!

With good intentions you act without thought.
Thou art guilty of innocence, yet innocently guilty;
by your doing I am a coin with shaved edges,
my value depleted by your unwitting, but responsible hands.

Oh, Dearest of Acquaintances!

In continual, inexorable brevity we join.
Scores of moments! They, once relived,
disclose only the fleeting nothing of chatter
and my desperation to prolong our casual contact.

Oh, Pitiable Me.

I have resigned to listless inactivity,
to an apparently un-rectifiable, self-defeating situation;
and accordingly, whilst guilt resides in my Thieving Acquaintance,
the blame resides with me.


Thank you
-Maggie

Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
VivelaMusique
Comment
VivelaMusique commented Comment · Aug 22, 2010

Thanks for the review! Out of curiosity did you mark those words because they're big? Or because of how they were used?

User avatar
KitxKat
Review
KitxKat wrote a review Review · Aug 17, 2010

VivelaMusique wrote:Neither docile nor timid thou art.
Yet with your veritable tenacity you prevail
upon my consciousness; an insistence
in webbed corners and those always clean.

Oh, Thief of all Thieves!

You have robbed perfume from the flowers.
And suddenly I am a frequenter of a flat meadow;
once a mélange of scents, now muted by a breeze
that brings only the fragrance of my obsession.

Oh, Paradoxical Man!

With good intentions you act without thought.
Thou art guilty of innocence, yet innocently guilty;
by your doing I am a coin with shaved edges,
my value depleted by your unwitting, but responsible hands.

Oh, Dearest of Acquaintances!

In continual, inexorable brevity we join.
Scores of moments! They, once relived,
disclose only the fleeting nothing of chatter
and my desperation to prolong our casual contact.

Oh, Pitiable Me.

I have resigned to listless inactivity,
to an apparently un-rectifiable, self-defeating situation;
and accordingly, whilst guilt resides in my Thieving Acquaintance,
the blame resides with me.



This was a very free and flowy. I have one problem with this, and that is the use on so many words (Check all the words I've colored)
TO be honest, it's not even a problem. I like the use of big words.
~Kit



There has never been a sadness not cured by breakfast food.
— Ron, Parks & Rec