Published June 2, 2011
I am a fool to doubt my feelings,
To pray and hope for what can’t be.
Upon the dark and stormy evening
I saw you once and ever since
My soul has lost its wings,
My mind lost all reason.
A bird caught in the mortal thorns of love.
Release the pain, oh fair maiden.
Unchain my heart and let me fly again.
For I have tasted flight and now forever
I’m doomed to watch the sky but walk the Earth.
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140,620 Literary Works • 673,561 Reviews
I liked this very much. I wish you would've continued it. My favorite part is "I'm a fool t doubt my feelings". We are all fools when it comes to feeling.
I love the emotion that you put into this.
I feel like I can really connect with the character. Feeling that way isn't the greatest feeling in the world, and a lot of people have a really hard time expressing themselves if they feel that way. I think you hit it dead on though. 
Overall, I thought this was really great.
Keep Writing!
-Jalmoc
Do you ever have those moments where someones words speak to you in a different way that they speak to others? THAT is the kind of poetry I look for, and you hit it on the nose!! Like writer4lifee said, I loved the first line, "I am a fool to doubt my feelings." But the one line that really spoke to ME specifically (which is also, like, the story of my life) was the second line: "To pray and hope for what can't be." All in all, though, this poem was very thoughtful. I was a little unsure of the usage of "oh, fair maiden." That seemed a little over-the-top. But the rest of it put words to the feelings that many thousands of people in this world. Well done!!
I really enjoyed this piece. I like where you say
because it is what most people go through. Good job with this, Keep writing/