Published September 25, 2009
Pippa
Does not dream in colour or in black and white. She dreams in sepia, a golden orange tone.
Pippa has a bad case of gypsy blues.
Pippa wishes she had made her dreadlocks at home instead of getting them done by a posh hairdresser.
Pippa is teaching her cockatoo to eat her crusts but it will only eat the bread.
Pippa always wakes up tangled in her dark satin blanket.
Pippa wants her mother to stop dieting and her father to stop drinking.
Pippa is a whole world away from where she is meant to be.
Let
Her
Fly.
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141,299 Literary Works • 674,335 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
Anyway let's get right to it,
Hmm...well this is quite the piece here. It seems at first glance like almost nothing, certainly when its in the category of a short story. It has a very much poetic vibe about it, but even that it seems a lot more simple than you'd expect and ends up being almost a short little song, but despite all of this it manages to feel oddly complete and pretty enjoyable.
Perhaps its the very sort of nursery rhyme vibe this whole piece has about it even though it is clearly meant to be something a bit more complicated judging from the actual sentences, and perhaps its the simple joy that seems to emanate from it but as simple and rather short this one happens to be, it really is a fun read.
Overall there's not much else to say really. Its just this oddly perfect blend of a children's nursery rhyme, a somewhat serious description of someone's emotions and also a happy little song all at the same time and I honestly can't do much besides say I like it. There doesn't seem to much you can add to or take away from this.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
I honestly don't know what it is I like about this. I suppose it must be the phrases and such.
Oh gawd, the possible directions for this is doing my head in, perhaps I am thinking too much about it.
My impression of Pippa is conflicted though, at first I thought perhaps she was a small girl, then a teenager and now for some reason I think she's a doll of some sort.
It's odd too because as much as the style seems very connected it is also disconnected. It is somewhat eerie. . . is someone watching Pippa !?
Needless to say, I still like Pippa very much. I'd be interested to see if you take this anywhere.
AT first when I noticed the short length. I didn't know what to think. I thought you might be one of those writers who try to write some quick garbage without good characters, voice or plot elements. You surprised me with the intensity of it. My favorite part was:
Let
Her
Fly.
Awesome use of spacing. Keep up the good work. I'm rooting for Pippa.
Um, I dunno, are you sure this is supposed to be in Other Fic? No offense, but it sounds a little more like poetry.
Character:
This looks like a very character-oriented piece. I like the character sketch; you can easily picture Pippa (girl trying to look bad and awesome while she looks too preened).
A little more on the thing of what she thinks. Yes, we see her hopes and wishes, but would the line, before 'Pippa always wakes up tangled in her dark satin blanket';
You know? Something like that.
Sorry. But yeah, its good, but is this supposed to be in Other Fiction?
*Ending was good*
Why do I like this? I don't know. I guess I like Pippa. I can root for Pippa. I can cheer for Pippa.