Young Writers Society

Hi, this is ZeldaIsShiek, here to review another amazing piece of literacy and beat the Werewolves once and for all! For the Witches shall win in the end! But before that happens, I am going to help you improve your writing as a whole and improve you as a Young Writer in the process. Of this I am certain. I like all literacy, regardless of what genre or subject it is falls under. When I review your work, this will become apparent to you. Are you ready? Let's begin the review!

Hello again, my old friend! I really like poem, and I think it is relatable and accurate. I think that your poem is very realistic, since this happens in real life relationships quite commonly. I think that you are a very good poet and can do great things! This is an amazing poem, and there really is not that much more for me to say because it is so quintessential. I like how the poet is talking to his previous partner and leaves out what she says. This is a personal battle that the poet is fighting, they are not as involved as the writer. Great work as always, and have a great Review Day!

-ZeldaIsShiek, for the glory of both the Witches and your amazing work!

Hello VegasLights! Kara here for a (hopefully) quick review!

Give me your soul.

With that aside, I'm not the best at poetry but here we go!

Bold = grammar and flow issues.
Italics = suggestions and overall
Strikethrough = remove
Underline = krazy Kara komments.

My interpretation:

Overall:

This review courtesy of

I really love this one!

Hello VegasLights, This is a good and easy read, I would say it is too simple, but it is true to itself and you don't pretend to dress it up which is good and honest work, I have a few suggestions I hope you like them.
The 1.rhyming scheme could be a lot better but I figure you will work your way to it when you write again.
2.the piece is believable and realistic, and the drama and the tension are also palpable, but it could be intensified.
3.there is a sense of pain in this piece but not enough to exhaust the reader emotionally.
4.the internal conflict of the writer could be highlighted in a better way.

Hello, E.E here for a possibly quick review and maybe some utter nonsense! So, let's get started.
So, the title caught my eye but reading over the poem itself, it just seemed bland. I felt as if the poem could use something to spice it up like metaphors or imagery. Something to make it more interesting. I thought the poem was okay and you most definitely put your emotions into it which is great. Also, "but how could you be friends if you are perfect strangers?" there should be a comma after "friends" and maybe word it differently. Try "but how could we be friends, if we are perfect strangers?" That might work better. The flow of the poem was pretty good, so no trouble there.
Now is when I dissect your poem and see if I can't get its meaning correct! So, in this poem you are talking about a break up. You still miss them so much, and think about all of the goofy conversations that you two held. You wonder why it was so conventional for them to just forget you while in your mind, it was so painful to lose them. Finding another was so easy for them, another to love and you can't comprehend that yet. You want to be friends but then again, your not quite sure with that thought. After all, you two don't talk anymore and you wonder why because he/she said you could still be friends. You can't be friends after all, because you are both strangers to one another, stranger that know one another's flaws and quirks. Strangers that know one another's demons. People who know one another yet, they don't quite.
Overall, the poem was okay but it needs some spice! Add something to it and keep up the good writing! Also, Happy Halloween!

Hey, VegasLights!

This is an "okay" read, but I think it could be better. I think you can add more poetic devices to it to add some "spice." Try and search for and study poetic devices, and perhaps you can incorporate one or two. You'll see that your poems will be more "alive" and engaging.

Keep writing!

Ate Jash x