Hello there Unknown Secrets! ^^
This is going to be my first review for today so excuse me if my still-sleepy-brain doesn't produce a very good review, but I'll do my best to help you!
I have to say that I agree with the things said by the two reviewers before me, and you should definitely do something with that advise.
The prologue is pretty much the most important thing in a novel, because it has to trigger people to read the rest of the book, so you need to make sure it's close to perfect! =)
When I finished reading this, I didn't really have an idea what it was about and it left me rather confused. It's good not to be predictable, but when I'm reading a prologue, I like to know at least a little bit of what this novel is going to be about so I can get excited for it.
So what would make this prologue a lot better is if you expand on it. It needs more description of where they are and who they are and what they're feeling. Try to make this whole scene come more to life for us. =) And give little hints to what this novel is going to be about.
This piece has potential, don't get me wrong, it just needs a bit of work! =D
But you definitely have talent as a writer and I wish you luck with writing this novel! <3
If you have any questions or anything, my inbox is always open. =)
-qaralynn-
Points: 374
Reviews: 165
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