BE MY EVERYTHING
I lost myself when I found you.
Suddenly life became heaven from hell.
Always I would be on a lookout for you,
Always seizing time for anecdotes to tell
Each day, on seeing you, I would heave a sigh of relief.
And in each handshake, I would witness your warmth and heat.
While looking at you, I would merely turn into a stone,
And my heart would always lose a beat.
I was happy, you were happy.
Life was perfect till there came a blow.
Hatred and despair seemed to surround me
And I would wait and wait for life to slow.
BROKEN HEART
The fly of time hovered,
On the balcony, I much awaited,
But she didn’t turn up
And became a person I hated.
The sun arose with hope
And set down desperately in the west,
But she didn’t turn up
Not even when the birds flew to their nest.
Darkness paved way for the sun
And another hopeful morning came,
I sat there with intentful eyes,
Again the sun went just the same.
Monotonous life had become,
Hope was shattered and nay,
At last, I saw a figure-
And it was her standing far away!
SHE LOVES ME NOT
I don’t care if you
Love me partially or in full measure.
Love is love
And there is no greater pleasure.
There was no darkness
From the day love started.
Till the day you said bye
And we departed.
There was no sunshine
Since your last smile
From that day on,
Memories started to pile.
I know, for this,
You are not to blame.
But whatsoever,
I never remained the same.
Love is lost. It still hurts me.
Sooner or later, I expected it to be.
LOVE IS LONELY
The convincing mood to wander
To the dark clouds did surrender.
A curse found its way through the mouth.
Anger enveloped me but I didn’t shout.
The sun rose and set. All day was a bore.
The soul wanted air, but was kept inside the door.
The heart ached for the freshness in the air.
For the lush-green landscape and its share
The eyes wandered as far as they could.
But could not perceive anything as good
The fingers fiddled with the lonesome pens.
The heart again ached as the clock struck ten.
Food was eaten with a distracted mind.
Nobody then seemed well and kind
The eyes were shut, but the mind was on.
The guilt of wasting a day gnawed upon.
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Woah I loved this poem so much! Also, it's so relatable on a deep level since I once felt this for someone I had a major crush on one time. I really love how all three of the poems connect together to show the different stages of love. How each poem shows its own complex and difficult yet simple to understand emotions humans experience. These poems are written beautifully and crafted very well! I say my favorite was "Be My Everything" or "She Loves Me Not."
Thanks for the review.
Hey, Gabi here for a review.
This is such a good poem! I can see so much depth in this. There is the new, warm feeling of a new relationship, the stabbing when you start to see that love fade, and the burning of those stab wounds even after the relationship ends that never really seems to fade (Sorry if that got a little gory) This really struck a chord with me. I also love the set up of this poem and how each part is sort of like a poem in itself, but it all goes together into forming an amazing set. Good job!
Thank you Gabi Smith for your comment. Glad you like the poems. By the way, which poem did you like the most?
To be honest "Love is lonely" I really like how it captures the aftermath of a breakup.
I love the design of the poem- something unique and refreshing at the time.
I like, also; certain sentences as « there was no sunshine/ Since your last smile. »
I like the way you get straight to the point at the very opening line.
And refer so easily to the deepest feelings that are mine.
I love you being everything and describing a broken heart and loneliness of love.
How you convince my wandering mind of being as pure and lonesome as a dove.
No truly, I love the originality of your poem; and the way that you write life out of its full extent.
By that I mean the way you write about pain being a fragment of happiness in which things are as they meant.
Keep on with the great work, so as guilt not to waste a day gnawed upon.
For loved is the mind of a lover whose eyes are shut but whose mind is on.
Thank you for your awesome review, Silver moon. You summarised my poems in a prose. I love that.