Published November 3, 2005
The Garden Of Life
Greed is like a thistle,
Its flowers hold much beauty,
As they stand on thorny stems.
Hate is like a nettle,
You cannot clasp it in your hands,
Without feeling its sting.
And a smileis like a primrose,
Its delicate petals fragile in a garden,
Overrun with weeds.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,381 Literary Works • 674,386 Reviews
You make me cry
Very creative, and somewhat real because it refers to the nature
Well, I was wandering how you and other poets come up imagining things so naturally?
P.S. I was wandering what "smileis" was. Is it a typo?
Wow, very nicely written. I liked the metaphors and the imagery...you put it together very nicely. The concept was also very good, as Rach said.
Chevy's Critiquing Scale
far left colon - not so great
far right colon - excellent
Title ..... | - : - - -|
Flow ..... | - - - : -|
Creativity ..... | - - - : -|
Imagery ..... | - - - : -|
Vocabulary ..... | - : - - -|
Consistency ..... | - - : - -|
Length ..... | - - : - -|
Emotion ..... | - : - - -|
Ending ..... | - - : - -|
Overall ..... | - - - : -|
No commenter..
Very pretty, and good concept. I dont really see much wrong with it, except for the typo in the last stanza. Yup, good work.