The Sun Children V - The Princess' Crown - Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

 

The Twilight Trees

 

*********

 

The next day passed in the great woodlands of Nyshuhr. Upon the third morning a sun lit mist entered the trees and engulfed the foreseeable distance in a glimmering due. Sapphire stepped onto a path of twigs and moss which trailed through the forest. Above her the trees were tall and their canopies were hidden amidst the bright sun light that shone brightly between each and through gaps in the branches.

 

Just then she took another step onto a section of the path where ancient stone could be seen beneath the undergrowth. She looked up at the path ahead and saw that it crossed into a white fade where nothing could be seen the other side. Something then moved above. Birds flew from tree to tree, singing as they sat on branches watching the refugees below. Leaves of red and gold colours began to rain down upon the princess and she caught one in her hand. At the touch of her gentle palm the leaf burnt to cinders and she crushed her hand together before opening it to let the fragments fly away in a passing breeze.

 

            “We are here” said Fennok.

 

            “Finally!” whispered many others or words of the sort.

 

            “How can you be sure we are here?” asked Fehrnire.

 

            “Look above you, your highness.” answered Vahil. He then went to Sapphire’s side and joined her in gazing unto the airy skies of the forest.

 

“We are amidst the trees of gold and red. They mark the region of the red dawn. The very city where Rhandyr was born here five hundred and twenty nine years ago. Although he became corrupted in later life, he was celebrated as a ruler of Nyshuhr nonetheless.” said Fennok.

 

            “Would people not have lost faith in him after he sent his armies to death?” asked Maharl, whose limp had now become better.

 

            “That you’ll have to ask the people here. I myself have only visited these forests once before, but I know the Lord of Nyrsu Gara from many years ago”

 

Just then a shadow emerged and Sapphire looked up to see a statue of a great king stood upon a hill facing the road they entered on, but its head was tilted up towards the sun. He was the same height as Fennok yet his black stone appearance reflected off of the sun and made it hard for anyone to really see much of him before moving into shade.

 

The hill the statue stood upon was one of many around the area. They each had a tree atop either with red or golden leaves and they grew tall in the more open space surrounded by the forest. Red petals covered the floor and still fell from branches high above.

 

Fehrnire took his horse a little along the road and behind the statue he noticed a hidden gateway. It was covered in ivy and either side was an equally hidden stone wall.

 

            “I’m beginning to wonder if anyone still lives here” he said.

 

            “Of course they do brother, do you not think as royals we would’ve heard if an entire city disappeared? Also they are isolated people, they do not get involved in the business of larger cities if they can help it. However, our refugees should be here somewhere!” Sapphire replied.

 

Upon reaching the ancient looking gates the knights and civilians listened to the silent creaking of the trees around them and watched their leaves fall. The royals and their General approached the gates and waited.

 

A loud rumble occurred and the giant wooden doors began to move. They opened inwards to reveal a large courtyard surrounded by tan buildings and in the centre there stood a very tall tree that grew both red and gold leaves. Many people could be seen gathered around the tree, but they barely made a sound. Temporary shelters had been put up all over and a few wondered about with jugs of water.

 

A lone aged man came forth to greet the party from the capital. He wore green robes under silver armour and bowed to the royals

 

            “Your highnesses, I am aggrieved by your loss, your parents were good people and valiant rulers, but now the people put their trust in you” he said softly. Fehrnire at this point looked away, as if to refuse responsibility, whilst his sister, ever the more approachable, came forward.

 

            “Thank you, good man. Are all these here the refugees from the capital?” she asked.

 

The old man nodded,

 

            “Yes, they arrived a couple of days before you, your highness. But what you see here is merely a small amount of those that have entered our secluded city. I must say, we here were all surprised by the amount that managed to escape from such an uprising of Argarians”

 

            “May we enter your city so we may plan what is to happen next?” asked Fennok upon his horse. He could see the prince, the natural heir to the nation, was to make no attempt to take leadership and so stepped in.

 

            “Yes, you can. I will warn you though your highnesses, our streets are full and there aren’t many supplies for everyone, but we will not turn away the innocent”

 

Maharl turned to Vahil and whispered,

 

            “They support the innocent – why do they still mourn king Rhandyr?”

 

Vahil shook his head and acted to look as if he did not care about the matter, but he too thought as such.

 

The old man led Sapphire through the gates first, followed by her brother, then Fennok and the many knights and refugees. They flooded into the courtyard where the larger branches from the large tree draped onto wooden frames upon the buildings and smaller branches wound themselves down in leaf.

 

There were a great many refugees camped out in the courtyard, many looked sad, but just as many appeared to keep their hopes high and went on with their life. Both groups of people looked upon the princess as she stood before them wearily. They bowed to her in sympathy for all were loyal to Safron. The sun child was welcome in Nysru Gara as only five hundred years before another was born in the very city.

 

All went silent and Sapphire walked along side Fehrnire on his horse. The prince dismounted his creature and handed it to another servant who asked to do as such. He was one of many who walked amongst the red knights and took their horses from them so that they were all able to walk easily through the cramped streets.

 

The old man ushered in a group of men dressed likewise and asked them to guide the new refugees to any free areas where they could rest.

 

The royals and the knights were guided by the old man through one narrow street where the homeless lingered either side. Branches hung overhead from other trees around the city and many were carved into elegant patterns. They provided shelter over the street where the sun broke through small gaps. Insects darted around the stanchly air in the heat and the sound of flowing water became very welcome.

People of the city walked passed Sapphire carrying jugs of water from a nearby river. A wooden bridge spanned the width and led into another street where, at the end was a high structure with a set of closed wooden gates.

 

The old man told his followers to wait for a moment whilst he walked forth and spoke to a couple of silver armoured guards keeping watch over the structure.

 

He returned shortly with a loud creaking behind him as the gates opened unto the sight of a great meadow ridden in sun light.

The grass was green and well kept, but as it rippled into the near distance it turned a darker shade where no more than a hundred tents were stood upon the grand lawns. They housed hundreds of homeless from the capital and many came out to see Sapphire and Fehrnire walk amongst them.

They threw flowers in the royals’ path and gave many to the knights who followed, save for the red armoured sort who still brought back nightmares of the Argarians.

 

Down the largest of the avenues amongst the tents was a monument of a sort. It was a plinth of a sort upon which was a hand of black stone wherein the palm lay a golden stone. Sapphire did not know what it was, nor did anyone else, not even those from the city who had lived there all their life.

 

Around the monument was a ring of grass which formed a round cul-de-sac of tents. From the largest, draped in Nyshuhrian flags, stepped a man of full armour and robe. A silver crown lay upon his silver hair and his face was welcoming.

 

He knelt before the heirs to the nation he served and introduced himself,

 

            “I am Lord Gyrah, your highnesses. There was a grave silence here when we heard of the events passed, but I am sure if the country is willing to unite, we will restore order and glory!”

 

Sapphire helped the Lord to his feet and spoke confidently,

 

            “Lord Gyrah, your help is appreciated. You and your people have done well to look after those who had lost everything”

 

            “Gyrah!” shouted Fennok.

 

            “It’s been a long time my old friend. When did you come to the forest?” he asked.

 

            “That is a long story, but you, General of the royal guard! I would never have guessed that!” Gyrah answered.

 

            “That too is a tale for another time, there are more pressing matters to discuss, we must speak with you about the next step in events”

 

            “Indeed!” the Lord agreed, he turned to the royals to speak, but Sapphire was knelt down as a small child approached her, flower in hand.

 

            “Princess, you’re so pretty, I wish I was like you!” she said. The young girl’s older brother came to her side and bowed to Sapphire. The princess could only think of the two young siblings as a resemblance to her and Fehrnire.

 

            “Thank you child, though I do not wish anyone to be like me. You are who you are and your life is what you make it, I have never had that opportunity. To be like me would only yield pain and suffering. If you are willing to follow your heart you shall prevail”

 

She smiled at the young girl who did the same.

 

            “Your highness - let me take you and the others to my hall. There we shall discuss what is to happen!”

 

Sapphire gave a nervous sigh and replied’

 

            “Ok, let us be on our way”

 

The party moved through the camp where many impoverished refugees still bowed in loyalty to their fallen king’s children.

 

At the end of the camp there was a round circle of stone slabs where a path led away up a hill. At the top was a flight of stone steps that took travellers to the door of the grand hall of Nyrsu Gara. It was built in the second age of Osirigardin and was relatively small compared to larger structures in the capital, yet it was built in a similar style. Three great arches stood outside where the door was through the centre of the three.

 

Upon the Lord’s arrival the doors were opened and Sapphire got a look at the grand internal structure. A grand stone pavilion stood in the centre where a great tree grew. The branches spread wide and high and the red and gold leaves grew into the grand domed ceiling where sunlight entered halfway up.

 

Beyond the pavilion were low steps where, upon the landing a long wooden table resided. Gyrah had the old escort and his other men of green robes men pull chairs out for the royals and Fennok to sit at the table. The Captains and the red knights stood at the top of the stone steps and watched as the seated four were joined by another.

 

            “Ah Captain Ryahr, I am most pleased you are here, please sit!” Gyrah insisted.

 

The Captain, a young yet battle-worn man with brown hair and a small beard gazed upon Sapphire with wonder. She was fairer than he had ever imagined from what people had whispered. Vahil watched as Ryahr was taken aback by the girl he had come to like more than he should.

 

Sapphire smiled at the captain as he bowed and sat near Gyrah.

 

            “So where do we begin your Highness?” the Lord asked, his smile turning into one of a stern expression.

 

            “I am not accustom to these sorts of matters, it would be better to ask my sister, milord” Fehrnire answered.

 

Once again Sapphire sighed at her brother’s excuse and spoke in her brother’s stead,

 

            “The Argarians have taken control of western Tavral. If we do not move fast they may even reach these hidden woods within a few days. Our issue at hand is to discuss what steps we should take to secure balance in my father’s nation”

 

            “Quite right, Princess” Fennok agreed.

 

            “Your highness, with your father in the realms of eternal sleep, his kingdom is hence passed unto you and your brother, these are your lands now, the people follow you, even more so, seen as you’re the sun child!” Gyrah answered.

 

            “I do not wish to be worshiped as an unworldly entity, not as Atharniak has been worshiped. I am a sun child yes, but I am also a princess of Nyshuhria. It is not my place to take the golden throne, but I shall lead my people through the darkness nonetheless!”

 

            “The men here in my army are loyal to the heirs of their nation, but will follow you whether you choose to be hailed as the sun child or not, your Highness” said the Captain.

 

            “As do we!” Vahil interrupted, not to let the other captain get the better of him. Maharl nudged him in the arm to silence him.

 

            “Thank you Captain Vahil” Fennok sighed before following on from his point,

 

“Our biggest question is now; how are we to respond to a threat so great as the one posed by Argar?”

 

There were a few moments of silence from everyone. Fehrnire stayed quiet as expected and Fennok sat back to wait for a response. Suddenly, Sapphire sat forwards and stated;

 

            “We go to war!”

 

Everyone seemed shocked by the declaration, but secretly they were all thinking the same.

 

            “That would be a massive undertaking! We would need to muster both enough men to hold back our largest and vunerable cities from the Argarians, but also gather enough force to invade the enemy’s lands!” Gyrah shouted, but then realised of whom he was speaking to.

 

            “Forgive me for my audacious response your highness, but we already have men out at Shanyr, fighting off the Inarians. We here have not enough men to spare for war, if the Argarians are as you say, likely to reach our woods, we will not be able to defend ourselves!”

 

Sapphire stood and went behind her chair to pace before those at the table and those stood opposite.

 

            “Years ago, my father led many men into battle against the first wave of Inarians. It was one of the bloodiest conflicts we have seen in the last century. Not only did he muster men from Rhunahr, but from Hahnar and Urasha also. We stand on the edge of downfall, divided. All three realms need to be reunited and we can only do this by taking them all into war as one unit. I advise that we send messengers to the other realms and demand their armies make haste to a single ground whereby we march to Argar’s borders!”

 

            “We cannot do this, your highness! As much as I admire your enthusiasm, I will not have my city put at risk after I have worked so hard to maintain its own well-being!” the Lord argued.

 

            “Do you refuse your sun child’s order? Your city followed one sun child into war before, I do not expect them to follow one into another after so many were slain. They can defend the city, but the other realms and holds must come!” Sapphire shouted back at him. Fennok, Vahil and Ryahr smiled at her claim of authority. She was becoming the leader everyone had envisaged.

 

            “Actually, your highness, I sent message to the King of Uhria not so long ago asking that he come to this hall to discuss the situation in Shanyr. He should be here this very day as it happens” said Ryahr.

 

            “Uhria? Do you think they would join us on our conquest?” asked Fennok.

 

            “We can only find out”

 

***

 

Two men rode into Nysru Gara on horseback, sporting light sand coloured armour with dark mains atop their helmets. Their swords hung at their sides as they came through the trees in haste. More men in green robes led them through the refugee camp and to the doors of the hall.  

 

***

 

The two men entered the hall and bowed to the royals of Nyshuhria. Sapphire bowed in return as Gyrah introduced them.

 

            “This is Dhara Nehri of Uhria, high king of the desert lands, and his son Ehra”

 

            Both men were of a tanned and battle-scarred skin and had dark beards with little hair. They both had large builds and wore their armour with pride. Then, Nehri spoke in a deep and booming voice that sent shivers down the spines of the unexpecting.

 

            “When we received message that we were to discuss the situation in the marshes I did not know that Safron’s children would be present, is there something I should know?”

 

            “Actually, there is your Highness!” said Ryahr.

 

            “Princess, it is your time to speak with the king of Uhria” he followed.

 

            “No, if the matter is of great importance, I will speak only with the prince, I fear the princess will not understand such issues!”

 

Suddenly Sapphire felt anger swell inside her and she did not hesitate to hold it back.

 

            “Do not denounce me, I am of a higher authority than my deceased father ever was, I am the sun child albeit I do not wish as such. You will respect me Dhara, even if your laws do not acknowledge my existence. I know your people in the desert worship Enigwhir, goddess of the sun. I am the descendant of the Nyshuhrian equivalent and you will listen to what I have to say!”

 

Nehri took a seat in silence to listen, scared of the girl’s fiery passion, as was everyone else in the room, especially those who had seen her use her abilities and knew what she was capable of.

 

            “The war in Shanyr must still be fought if our shores are to be secured, but more pressing matters are more at hand- “ she began.

 

            “What could be more pressing than this? My men risk their lives for your country’s safety!” Nehir interrupted, and this annoyed the Sapphire.

 

            “Let me finish. Whilst I at least acknowledge your country’s help, had it not been for our help you would still be overrun by tribes in the desert, you owe us your country’s safety likewise. Now, as I was saying, the Argarians have overrun the north west of Nyshuhr, if they close off our western shores and find allegiance with the Inarians, we are finished. We need you to order your armies into Nyshuhr, they can defend our lands whilst we go north to destroy the Argarians once and for all. This way you will be able to defend your own country at the same time and you will receive supplies for your impoverished people. What say you?” Sapphire’s blue eyes were wide and fear striking as she spoke.

 

Nehri could now see that Sapphire was not to be messed with, she was a valiant speaker and had had true passion for her country’s wellbeing.

 

            “It appears that I have underestimated your ability to speak as a leader. Though I am sceptical about your claims of being as powerful as our goddess, I will adhere to your wishes. I will return to Shanyr and issue a messenger to Uhria to muster her men.”

 

            “Also, I am sorry for the loss of your parents. If you maintain the attitude you have, the throne will be yours without a question of a doubt.”

 

            “I refuse to take up the throne, but thank you nonetheless Dhara, may your journey be safe! These are dark times we live in now, we must work quickly to secure our best hopes!” Sapphire answered.

 

Nehri stood up from his chair and ushered his son before him down the steps and out of the hall.

 

            “I didn’t know you had it in you to speak as such, your highness!” said Fennok. His smile suggested he was impressed with her display of passion to her father’s country.

 

            “Yes, well done Sapphire, you make a far better leader than I ever could!” said Fehrnire.

 

            “I should not have to do your job for you! Grow up brother, I can see what father meant now, more than ever!” she shouted in anger.

 

            “What do you mean?” he asked, scowling unsurely.

 

            “I will not discuss that now; there are still issues to speak of!”

 

            “Yes, there is, it appears that we are indeed upon the brink of war. Your declaration has been made bold. Where are the armies of all three realms to muster your highness?” asked Gyrah.

 

            “I am not sure, I have heard of a city as large as Nyshuritan on the eastern sea, as grand and with courts large enough to hold the country’s armies twice over”

 

            “You speak of Rhushar?” asked Ryahr.

 

            “Yes, I think so, I do not know its name” she answered.

 

            “Well its courts are not as expansive as you make out, but it is the second largest city in the country, it is better guarded than the capital too” laughed Fennok.

 

            “Rhushar shall expect our council in the coming days. First we must rest, the evening draws near” said Sapphire. The Fennok stood to speak.

 

            “Rhushar likes to stay out of capital business your highness, your presence may not be as welcome as you may like. Nevertheless I shall muster our knights to war, along with any civilians who wish to join us; we will need all the able bodied men we can get!”

 

            “You may rest in the chambers below the court tonight, your highnesses” said Gyrah.

 

A group of maids emerged from the shadows of the inner court and knelt before Sapphire.

 

            “If you would come with us, milady” the centremost said nervously.

 

As the princess began to follow them Fehrnire stood from his chair with a frown from Fennok.

 

            “Sapphire, what did you mean?!” he demanded to know.

 

            “Good evening, brother” she simply replied.

 

She was taken through a side door in the hall where she descended a flight of stairs into the inner depths of the hall’s complex. Eventually she was shown to her room through golden doors where she was left in peace for the night.

 

The chamber was grand and a four-posted bed lay against one wall whilst a fireplace was on another and a water basin upon a third, the door was on the fourth side. The floor was lightly lit by slits of light entering from the ceiling in square holes.

 

Sapphire sat upon the soft bed and removed her cloak so that she sat in her opulent red and gold dress which reflected very much the symbolism of her country. There were a range of swirls and ‘sun reaches’ as they were known; lightning bolt shaped lines with spiralled flicks on the ends. She removed her heavy golden boots from beneath her under layer of the dress. Her feet were in blisters and she cringed slightly in pain.

 

Carefully, she unclipped the belt round her waist and unhooked the scabbard holding her father’s golden sword. She placed it by her bedside for fear of a sudden attack and she might need to defend herself without her abilities at hand.

 

She slipped into a thin white night gown she found in a nearby wardrobe and lay in the soft bed, staring into space with thoughts of the coming days swarming her troubled mind. She closed her eyes.

 

 

*********

 

Ember’s eyes opened. She could hear the near birdsong and a breeze running passed her and slowly looked up. A canopy of trees hung overhead and leaves fell to the ground as they rustled under dawn skies. They were in the forests east of the hill forts which themselves were east of Ringfields. They had escaped the horrors of Arzuritan for now, and by doing so they had sent a grave message back to Larinian, the sun child was active in her abilities.

 

 

Sharla woke up next to Ember and cuddled her with a sleepy smile. The others were resting against nearby trees with blankets over them that they had packed. There was tranquillity about the site they were resting in. Through the trees were silent meadows of green grass that rolled into the brightening horizon and birds flew over them and into the above canopies. The trees were somewhat colder to the ones Ember saw in he dream.

 

            “We are safe for now Em” Sharla whispered.

 

            “Yes, we are sis.” Ember thought back to the last time they both together and not running from someone wishing to kill them. At such a time their mother was still alive and Ember now missed her early morning wake up calls, pointless as they were, it was what she was used to. Now all of that was gone it felt like nothing would ever be the same, her mother was dead and she could not even recall her last words to her. A tear rolled from her eye and fell onto Sharla’s hand across her stomach.

 

            “We’ll be alright Em, mother wouldn’t want us mourning her when such dangers are about” she said.

 

            “I’m not letting Larinian, or anyone he commands touch you Sharla”

 

Ember hugged her sister tightly and wiped away her own tears. They both sat in each others arms for a few moments before something stirred behind them.

 

            “It is a fine morning to travel, I must say” said Theran, emerging from a tree behind them.

 

            “Oh, I didn’t see you there Theran” Sharla answered with a nervous smile. She sat up and watched Theran sit against a tree next to her whilst Ember scowled to herself slightly.

 

“I trust you both had a good sleep?” Theran asked.

 

Sharla looked at Ember and they both shook their head before Ember mumbled,

 

            “Me and Shar are orphans now.” 

 

            “Oh yes, I forgot you lost your mother, I am sorry, Ember”

 

Ember nodded with a dismissive look and turned away to stare into the thicket of trees.

 

Sharla saw Theran become worried that he might have said something wrong and so she said comfortingly,

 

            “She is still upset Theran, as am I. The sadness of our loss kept us awake last night, well most of the night”

 

Sharla looked upon Ember who cringed in pain and held her head with one of her palms.

 

            “You had another dream didn’t you Em?”

 

            “Look at that!” shouted a nearby voice. Everyone looked through the trees and saw Karnon stepping amongst them, looking into the sky. By example the others also looked up and saw a trail of smoke drifting across the early morning air, brisk and cold.

 

            Dialar walked to his side and also looked.

“It’s Arzuritan, she is still aflame even now”

 

“We should get moving” insisted Hanron who had already began to pack his bag ready to travel again.

 

Their horses were tied to the trees a short distance away and were quickly untied by Valan who had quickly packed away his book of which he was writing in. He was perhaps the most skilled with the creatures.

 

            “Why do we have to go now?” Sharla asked, helping Ember to her feet”

 

            “Arzuritan does not sleep, Larinian knows your sister is alive and will stop at nothing to kill her, we must go” Theran answered, helping to pack her blanket into her bag.

 

Shortly they were mounting their respective horses, Sharla was helped onto Anaril by Theran and she helped her sister up to sit before her again.

 

Their eventual movement through the trees was not one of haste, but of a gentle ride down a road between two ridges with trees either side. There were deer in the woods which ran at the sight of coming horses. Their hooves clopped on the rough stone road and were the only sounds amidst the air save for the gentle creaking and rustling of the breathing trees either side.

           

It was a while before the ridge ended and levelled out onto soft grass verges either side. By now the skies were a lighter blue and the air was warmer. Sunlight began to shine through the canopies above and there were a sign of a settlement near ahead. Stone buildings were in the trees. Many they were grey and held together from wooden beams along the walls. Smoke rose from the chimneys and suddenly a child ran across the path, staring wondrously at the arrivals.

 

            “Em, put your hood up, I do not know where the allegiance of these people lie, just to be safe” whispered Sharla. Ember did as she was advised and swept her fringe behind the thick material of the cloak she wore.

 

More people became visible in the trees. They wore baggy clothing and carried around barrows and buckets, or even farming tools. They all stood where they were on the verge and bowed to the soldiers of Arzuria riding into their small village.

 

Around a corner a great many more buildings came into view and the companions realised that they had ridden into a small agricultural settlement.

 

            “Where are we?” asked Dialar.

 

            “Rindova, the forest town upon the river Carnemur” answered Hanron, keeping a weary watch about the inhabitants of the woods.

 

            “Stay close to me, it is unclear if the people here know about the sun child” he added.

 

At the end of the village and through a line of trees a vast river could be seen flowing through, and then as one looked above the canopies they could see the peaks of grey mountains.

 

A large tent was stationed at the end of the road and it flew the flag or Larinian’s court, suddenly Ember felt a lot more worried about where she was. Upon reaching the tent a man in armour, much like Hanron’s emerged. He held a helmet in his hand and his hair was dark. He looked a little younger and had a better build to him, so much in fact that his armour looked slightly tight upon him. He bowed to Hanron as he stood in his path.

 

            “You are men of Lord Larinian’s army?” he asked.

 

            “Yes we are” Hanron responded.

 

Ember scowled in disgust to being regarded as one of the thugs of a so called leader.

 

            “We have come to this village as we must find a safe way into Erivania, what name do you go by?” Hanron went on to ask.

 

            “My name is Nardul, I am General of the men stationed here at Rindova. May I ask what business you hold in Erivania? And why you seek safe passage when the entire land is under the Lord’s control?” the man replied. This called for Hanron to think quickly about his answer.

 

            “Lord Larnian fears the Kornians plan an uprising and he needs to warn the people of the southern forest so they are prepared for attack”

 

As luck would have it, Nardul seemed to accept this answer.

 

            “That I can understand, the Kornians have been very quiet as of late. There is only one problem with your request though, General. The Kornians have extended their borders across southern Alornia, they have taken their last step in securing an entire wall of mountains stretching south. If you are to travel to Erivania, you must now go through Kornia.”

 

            “That is not good news” whispered Dialar.

 

            “Why not?” asked Theran. His question interested Sharla and she too listened to the answer.

 

            “We run from Arzurian soldiers, but if we run into the Kornian sort, we may as well run back to Larinian, whose company is perhaps safer”

 

The sisters and Theran looked worriedly at one another.

 

            “Let them come! They can’t be that bad!” stated Karnon, clenching his fist around the horse’s reins.

 

            “No, do not wish for such, not even you could take them my friend!” Dialar responded with a hush tone.

 

Nardul called some of his soldiers over and they bowed before Karnon.

 

            “Take the horses from these weary travellers, they may stay in the village for the night.” He then turned to look at the dismounting companions.

 

            “I will go now and think how best to escort you to Erivania, rest easy” he said.

 

Suddenly an elderly man appeared from between a couple of trees, swaying his arms angrily. He wore long green robes and a gold chain hung from his neck.

 

            “Not more soldiers! We are a peaceful village, why must you come and take that away from us!?”

 

            “Silence, Mayor! Don’t defy the Lord’s will!” Nardul yelled at him.

 

            “Yes, the ‘great’ lord should be obeyed…I’ve heard it all before. I am tired of his repressive rule! May the gods help your Lord when the sun child returns! Then he’ll be thrown in the dirt like we have been for the last fifteen years!”

 

            “I said silence, old man! Do not dare speak of the sun child! They who bring only fire and death!” Nardul argued, taking a step towards the downbeat Mayor of whom answered,

 

            “And your Lord doesn’t?!”

 

This was the last straw. Nardul charged forth with his sword drawn and held it at the old man’s throat.

 

            “I will not kill you, but only because you are a figurehead for the people of this village. Though your head would look nice nailed to the bows of a ship nonetheless!”

 

Ember could only watch in distress as someone who hoped only for the sun child’s return was being held at a blade’s edge.

 

The Mayor walked away in silence whilst the six men Nardul had summoned smirked, all but one that is.

 

            “Where are we to stay tonight?” asked Karnon rather abruptly.

 

Hanron rolled his eyes as Nardul answered,

 

            “Master Barlin, escort these people to the ‘Carnem-Inn’” he ordered.

 

            “Sharla turned to the creature stood next to her and stroked his nose as he was taken away.

 

            “Good bye Anaril” she whispered. Everyone picked up their bags which had been unloaded from the horses which were being taken to the stables by the other five men at Nardul’s disposal.

 

They followed Barlin along the riverfront and passed many cautious villagers going about their business. None seemed to be bothered by the fact that Ember was not wearing armour of any sort and looked more like a hostage than part of the unit. They came to a large wood and stone building with a sizely sign out front.

 

            “Here you are, the Carnem – Inn” Barlin said. He stepped aside to let the other pass and smiled at Ember as she passed for she seemed mysterious yet timid in her approach.

 

The insides of the Inn were of warm wood and smelled of ale and smoke from a roaring wood burning fire. The bartender handed Hanron a set of keys and he distributed them to his fellow companions. The others sitting and drinking in the Inn watched in annoyance and wonder as the soldiers gathered in the centre of the bar. By now they were used to it with Nardul’s men and knew better than to poke their noses into army business.

 

***

 

Upon nightfall the village had settled for the night. Many hung about in the pub, drinking ale, laughing, talking, and singing. Karnon, Dialar, Valan and Hanron sat at a table in the corner minding their own business. Valan then got up to leave and disappeared into the busy gathering of villagers. The other three were now left by themselves with half empty tankards of ale before them. Their conversation was quiet, but it did not last long. A single man pushed his way through the crowds in the centre of the pub that hung around the wooden support beams. It was Barlin, but he was dressed less casually than before. He now wore only his under armour clothing with his sword still hung from a belt at his side.

 

            “General Hanron?” he enquired.

 

            “Yes Master Barlin, what is it”? Hanron answered.

 

            “General Nardul has ordered me to inform you that yourself, and the others are to be summoned to the old mill in the woods at sun rise tomorrow. He says we are to travel the Carnemur to reach the northern Erivanian banks.”

 

            “We?” asked Dialar

 

            “Yes, myself, my brother, two others and General Nardul are to navigate you down the river, it can be treacherous in places, you will need someone who knows the route well to guide you.” He answered.

 

            “How are we getting there?” asked Karnon. Dialar stared unamused at his friend and shook his head.

 

            “The Carenmur is a river, you work that one out!”

 

Hanron waited with a raised brow whilst the two finished conversing.

 

            “Thank you Master Barlin. If you are to tell the others, I believe they are upstairs” he said.

 

Barlin bowed and went and pushed his way back through the crowd again.

 

            “This may be trouble – I hope Miss Ember can keep her hood up for a long time”

 

 In due time he had informed the sisters and now crossed the hall to knock at the door opposite. Theran opened and stared unsurely at Barlin who looked slightly nervous.

 

            “Barlin, isn’t it?” he asked.

 

            “Yes, I come with news from General Nardul”

 

And so Barlin informed Theran of the message, but before he left he turned to ask,

 

            “Are you friends with the two girls opposite?”

 

A little shocked by the question, Theran slowly answered.

 

            “Well, yes I am, with one of them at least”

 

            “They are very pretty” Barlin observed.

 

            “Yes, she is – oh, you meant both sisters”? Theran stuttered, quickly realising he had been thinking only of Sharla.

           

            “Yes, especially the one with her hood raised. Emlyn is her name isn’t it?”

 

Theran thought for a moment and realised what was going on. Ember had obviously tried to deter any links with her unusual name and instead used her mother’s.

 

            “Yes, Emlyn” he replied.

 

            “Alright then, well I came to tell you what I needed and now I shall return to General Nardul” said Barlin. He bowed hs head and moved on towards the stairs at the end of the hall.

 

Theran could hear the noise coming from downstairs and closed his door to sharped the blade for his bow, but then he heard laughter coming from the sisters’ room opposite.

 

“This pub used to be named the ‘Dynar-Inn’ a word play on the name of the last unrivalled queen of Arzornia but, when Arzuritan came into being all names of the old kingdom were banished. So we named the pub after the river which flows by.” The bartender said.

 

            “And where does the river go?” asked Hanron.

 

            “Well, into the old kingdom of Arzornia, of course. No one really travels the waters anymore for the Kornians have overrun the mountains both sides and muster in secret, so I have heard from Nardul’s men”

 

            “What can you tell me about Nardul? When did he come here?” Hanron asked as he leant in closer, taking a sip of ale.

 

            “A couple of years back now, Nardul and many others arrived on the Lord’s orders. They did not bother us at first and said that they were here merely to deter any Kornian wanderers. But over time they began to intimidate us and claim authority over our lives. Since then we have just learned to live with it.” the bartender answered before answering another question.

 

            “You say there were many others? What happened to them? I only saw six others today”

 

            “They went into the mountains to search for Kornians. They never came back. They say that the ruins of Arzornia are haunted by the mountain dwellers, that they now make it their home. All I can say is that if you are to travel by river to Erivania, do not make the mistake that you are safe. The Kornians have watch from both sides. Even the mountains you see opposite this pub are apparently infested. The good part about travelling by water however, is that the Kornians cannot. The great bridge that once led from Arzornia to the western plains was destroyed so that they could not mobilise. It is safer by river than travelling by land”

 

            “Thank you good man, may Riath be with you on your journeys!" Hanron said tactically. He waited for the bartender’s response.

 

            “You – you hope for the sun child’s return?” he asked

 

            “That must remain between you and me” Hanron answered.

 

            “Of course, General. There are not many of your sort who wish for their return, any who do are welcome customers of mine”

 

            “Thank you for your time. Here is one ‘novilar’ for the drinks” Hanron said, pushing a golden piece across the bar.

 

            “As much as I would appreciate your gold, which is more than enough, you may have your drinks for free. You have given me hope that others hope for the sun child’s return”

 

            “They may return sooner than you hope. Good night kind sir” Hanron said for a second time before pulling away into the pub.  

 

***

 

Upon the eastern tower of Ringwater Larinian stood. He watched his city below amidst the clutches of night. The streets were dark yet thousands of lights moved between them. His armies had begun to move out. Many were willing to serve, but just as many men were pulled from their homes and thrown into armour and given a sword.

 

The army marched in formation from the eastern gates where bodies still lay either side in high piles.

Long had the Lord pondered the message from the masked figure that had come to see him. He thought back to the years before, when he had first become Lord of Arzuria and soon Arzutare. The last Arzurian king’s funeral was conducted under a heavy downpour of rain whilst Larinian was sat nervously upon his new throne. Four men in black masks entered and ushered in a much larger man in a mask of gold. There he had made a pact with the masked Lord that if the sun child returned in the east, message was to be sent to Argar, for they had been hunting the sun child for centuries.

 

Larinian feared the masked Lord’s power, but for years had thought nothing of it, until now. It would only be a matter of time before Argar would find out that the sun child was let loose into the world and her great armada of ships would breach Arzurian shores to unload her armies unto the hunt for the mistress of flames.

 

With that thought in mind, Larinian did not want to waste any time and so left his Court amidst the darkness. Only his elite guard would guard the throne in his absence and a small number of soldiers were to stay and enforce rule in the city. The Court of Lords was growing in power as those from the Court of Generals had left for war. Great schemes had begun to form as Larinian walked amongst his guard across Ringwater Bridge on his way from his stronghold of power. Powers were beginning to shift in the capital.

 

***

 

Ember stood up from the bed where she and her sister were sat above the Inn. She was careful not to gaze at the small fireplace on one side of the room as she turned to put on her boots.

 

            “What do you think of Theran, Em?” Sharla asked.

 

            “Well, it is obvious you ‘like’ him Shar” Ember answered.

 

            “What? I’m not quite sure what you mean – “

 

            “Oh come on Shar, you’re my sister, I can read you like a book!” Ember laughed.

 

            “Really? Fine then, I suppose I do ‘like him’. But are you alright with that?”

 

            “Sharla, you are my little sister, if he makes you happy, then I am fine with it. There is nothing more that I want in this world than to see you happy sis!”

 

Sharla flung her arms around her big sister and smiled warmly at her. She pulled away and looked at Ember tightening the buckles on her boots and asked,

 

            “Where are you going?”

 

            “I need to get some air Shar, now that I have the chance!”

Ember smiled at her sister once more before leaving the room. As she did she saw Theran exit his own room across the hall. She knew he desired to talk to Sharla and so she closed the door and, in a protective manner asked,

 

            “Do you like my sister?”

 

Theran was a little shocked by her unnecessary aggression and answered,

 

            “Y-yes I do Ember, she is my best friend”

 

            “Then make sure you look after her, if you hurt her even the slightest – well - I am the sun child, you work out the rest.” She replied before pulling up the hood on her cloak and walking down the hall, looking back as she did and seeing Theran knock at her and Sharla’s door.

 

She poked her head into the pub and could see Hanron walking across with another couple of tankards of ale in his hand. He was walking over to Karnon and Dialar who were sat at a table, talking amidst the shouting and laughter of the villagers. She made sure they could not see her before slipping out into the outside world. She looked up at a gap in the canopies above and saw that the stars were shining brightly in the sky. It was then that she heard the sound of rushing water and looked before her at the flowing river.

 

Slowly she walked to the edge and drew her sight to the quickly flowing river. The air was still mildly warm and was silent. She stepped forwards from under the canopy of overhanging trees and onto the large rocks in the water. There she stood in full view of the passing Carnemur and opposite were the great slopes of the western Arzornian Mountains.

 

She thought long to herself about whether she should just run away now, by herself. Leave everyone behind and keep them out of danger whilst she disappeared to be forever hunted. She would keep her sister safe, but would miss her more than anything.

With both her parents dead, Ember could not bear to lose any more family, and Sharla was her last relative, her sister and her best friend. Running away would only break Sharla’s heart and Ember could not bring herself to do that, even if her life depended on it.

 

Just then as she looked to her side she saw Valan stood by the water’s edge. He seemed quiet and reflective as usual, but she needed someone to talk to, albeit he was not the best person.

 

He looked at her as she approached and bowed his head before going back to stare at the water.

 

            “You’re Valan aren’t you?” Ember asked. She saw as the quiet man nodded without even shifting his eyesight.

 

            “Sharla told me about you” she began. Slowly his head turned and he looked at her. By now Ember was instead looking out across the Carnemur.

 

            “She said the army silenced you, that the army took away your pride and hurt you. You seem so lonely”

 

He merely nodded his head once again.

 

            “I know how you feel, I have lived alone for seventeen years, I haven’t even been able to see the world outside – I may as will have been sent to Koren” Ember mumbled.

 

            “You – you have no idea what it was like” sounded a voice from within Valan’s throat. His sudden speech startled Ember and she quickly turned to look at him.

            “You have not been alone for seventeen years. You had your mother and your sister. Sharla never told you what it was like in Koren did she? If she did you would not wish you were there. I endured suffering and aguish for standing up for that I believed in! Don’t tell me you know what it feels like, you have not experienced pain as I have!” said Valan aggressively, taking a step towards Ember. She began to move away in panic, breathing heavily.

 

            “I was just trying to make you feel better! You want to be alone, fine! I just can’t stand seeing people suffer in silence! And for your information, I do know what pain feels like, you have no idea what it is like being me, every time I stare at the sun I feel pain, but I cannot even scream, I am trapped in my own mind with a purpose I never even asked for!” she began to sob. Even those of whom she thought she could trust seemed to be turning on her.

 

She began to walk away down the river front, wiping the tears that were forming in her eyes. Valan could see that he had deeply upset her and, feeling bad he went after her.

 

He caught up with her and grabbed her arm to which she said,

 

            “If you’re going to strike me, please do not hesitate, no on else does!”

 

            “Miss Ember, please, I am – I am sorry. I did not mean to get angry. I have not spoken to anyone in seven years; my life has been harder than anyone cares to think for.” Valan replied.

           

            “If you want a hard life, try being the sun child. To have people depend on you, knowing you can’t help them breaks my heart. I feel helpless and misunderstood at the best of times – “

 

Ember was interrupted by Valan once again,

 

            “Why did you come to talk to me? Really?” he asked.

 

            “Because I do not think that anyone should be alone in such hard times! You risked your life to help save me, you must also hold hopes, hopes that I can stop Larinian? Just another hope that I cannot fulfil in my reluctance to step up to which I am!” said Ember tirelessly.

 

The soldiers around the fire heard raised voices and began to look for who ever was making them, but they saw it was only two of the companions and went back to their dwelling. A few villagers left the pub into the silent outdoors and dispersed to their own homes after bidding farewell to one another.

 

“I believe in you Miss Ember, every one does, otherwise why would they have rescued you? In time, and if you use that passion I have seen you display, you will be able to do anything!” Valan answered to her previous comment.

 

Rather dismissively, Ember simply said,

 

            “I should be going. There is still a long journey ahead of us!”

 

She snuck back to the hallway atop the Inn and crept along the wall as many were now sleeping.

 

Back in the room Sharla and Theran were sat close to each other, hand in hand and slowly moving in to kiss, but then they both heard a loud bang from the end of the hall and pulled away in panic.

 

A drunken woman waddled passed Ember, hanging into the walls with her shoes in the other hand

           

 

“Maybe I should go, before Ember gets back, it is late enough and we have a long way to go tomorrow!” Theran said, standing up.

 

“Alright then. I enjoyed your company Theran” Sharla replied.

 

“Likewise Shar, you really are great”

 

“Ember is alright by the way, about us” Sharla began.

 

Theran thought about Ember’s threat and knew that if he told Sharla, he could damaged the relationship they had and so chose not to say anything.

 

He simply smiled warmly at her as he opened the door to exit. Ember could see him leaving the room and hid in an indent in the wall as not to be seen. She waited until she heard his door close and then a couple more minutes until she stepped out and entered into Sharla’s company. She sat on the bed opposite her sister and began to unbuckle her boots.

 

            “Em, are you alright?” Sharla asked.

 

            “I’m fine” she answered, wiping one eye with the back of her hand.

 

            “At least I don’t have to be able to read you like a book to be able to tell you’re upset” said Sharla with a giggle and a comforting smile. She moved over and hugged Ember warmly.

 

            “What ever it is sis, you can tell me!” she whispered.

 

            “I never want to lose you Shar, i will never stand back and watch you suffer again!”

 

Suddenly Sharla realised that Ember may have actually contemplated running away and this made her hug her sister all the tighter.

 

A short while later both sisters were in bed. Sharla lay awake and stared over at Ember whose eyes were closed. Ember reluctantly fell asleep to dream once again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Comments & reviews · 2
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User avatar
Griffinkeeper
Review

It's been too long for this story to go without some critical review.

One thing that I noticed was that some of the descriptions were pretty odd.

“Look above you, your highness.” answered Vahil. He then went to Sapphire’s side and joined her in gazing unto the airy skies of the forest.


This is awkward because the reader expects us to follow Sapphire's gaze. Instead, you keep the focus on Vahil, until he has moved to her side. The question is- why? I could understand keeping the focus on him if he was going to do something while Sapphire was looking away, be it making a face, pulling a knife, or sending a silent signal to someone. But if something like that wasn't planned, then why not shift the focus to the trees?

Another annoying part was that some of the dialogue was really cliche.

“We are here” said Fennok.

“Finally!” whispered many others or words of the sort.


This seems like something out of the movies. In the movies, it is necessary for the travelers to verbally express relief with some muttered dialogue. In prose though, you can resort to something like "The rest of the party expressed relief at this." You don't have to recreate every snippet of dialogue that your group says; you can leave vague statements instead.

Now, if it happens is occurring that is of critical importance, then by all means give us the details. But if it's just some cliche, then cover it over with some narration. By replacing cliche dialogue with vague statements, you allow the reader to fill in their own dialogue, while still getting the same feel.

“Would people not have lost faith in him after he sent his armies to death?” asked Maharl, whose limp had now become better.


This is an odd sentence. Generally when a description is tacked onto a sentence, it is describe something that occurs as the person is talking. Things like pacing a room or sneering or making funny faces. If his limp became better as he was talking, it would make sense to attach it to the dialogue. If he has recovered, then you should make a separate sentence for that.

Upon reaching the ancient looking gates the knights and civilians listened to the silent creaking of the trees around them and watched their leaves fall. The royals and their General approached the gates and waited.

A loud rumble occurred and the giant wooden doors began to move. They opened inwards to reveal a large courtyard surrounded by tan buildings and in the centre there stood a very tall tree that grew both red and gold leaves. Many people could be seen gathered around the tree, but they barely made a sound. Temporary shelters had been put up all over and a few wondered about with jugs of water.


I thought that it was odd that they just waited outside. Most regular people would ring the doorbell or knock on the door. They don't have to do that, but it would make sense for them to announce their presence or say some variation of "We're important, let us in!"

Odd as this is, it is nothing compared to what is inside. People are wondering about with water jugs. Wondering seems like an unusual word to use; perhaps they are wondering about why they're not wandering around with water jugs. Their activity is also weird. They're either gathered around trees or carrying jugs of water. They're quiet too.

An encampment is notable for being noisy. If there are children, then they'll be shouting at one another or playing. If there is work to be done, then they'll be busy doing it. If anything was broken, they'll be fixing it.

I'll stop here, because these errors are fairly consistent throughout. I noted some spelling errors (due instead of dew, wondered instead of wandered) but I think the bigger issue is in directing the attention of the reader. You're trying to show us everything, but all we really need to see is what is important for the story. By showing everything, regardless of its importance, you obscure the important stuff. So the reader is tempted to think that everything you write is important, or nothing you write is important to the story. And the lazier the reader is, the more likely they are to just ignore it.

Hi, thanks for the review first of all. I can understand your points about too much external description and adverse dialogue, these are things brought up regularly. I think they are however, sorted in the 2nd, 3rd, 11th-17th chapters which i have been working on recently. i am planning to go through chapters 4-9 now anyway and have a look at reducing them, especially 6, which needs the most work done.

I will however take into account for my currently WIP chapters your advice about turning description into dialogue, this seems like something i could easily do. Also to use more logic about the surroundings and the impact they have, which is something i utilise in the more recent events anyhow.

Thanks again for your review, i've noted what needs to now be done on the previous works also. =)



Not tryna sound like a houseplant but sometimes all you need is food water and sun and suddenly everything is better
— Quillfeather