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Esperanto Translation - La Bildo de Dorian Grey, Oscar Wilde

by ThePenultimateGinger


(Disclaimer: this is obviously not my work, I am just translating it into a different language for the fun of it, and of course for practice. If you find any words or sentence structures that you find to be off, notify me so I can improve! Follows is "The Picture of Dorian Grey", a 1890 publication by Oscar Wilde that was regarded with controversy at the time of its release for its "homoerotic themes", of which there are none. I am choosing to translate this because: 1) the author is long dead and will not attack me for it, I hope, and 2) it has some great Faustian themes! The tale follows a young man, Dorian Grey, who gets himself tangled up in all sorts of shit that will break your heart. I hate it.)

La studo estis plena kun la riĉa odero da rozoj, kaj kiam la lumo somero vento ekscitita interne la arboj de la ĝardeno venis tra la pordo la peza odero de la siringo, aŭ la delikata parfumo de la rozkolora pikilo. De la angulo de la divano de persaj seliloj kiun li kuŝis, fumante, kiel kutime, sennombraj cigaredoj, Lord Henry Wotton nur povis kapti la brilon de la mielo-dolĉaj kaj mielkoloraj floroj de la Laburnum, kies teruraj branĉoj ŝajnis apenaŭ kapablajpor porti la ŝarĝon de beleco tiel flamega kiel iliaj; kaj nun kaj tiam la mirindaj ombroj de birdoj flugadis tra la longaj tussore-silka kurtenoj, kiuj estis etenditaj antaŭ la grandega fenestro, produktante specon de momenta Japana efiko, kaj farante lin pensi pri tiuj palajn pentristojn de jado-alfrontitaj, kiuj, en arto, kiu estas nepre senmova, serĉas transdoni la senton de rapideco kaj movado. La sullen murmuras de la abeloj pušante iliaj vojo tra longa neglekti herbo, ӑu rondiĝante kun monotono insisto ĉirkaŭe nigra onamita kolonaj de la frue Junio hollyhocks, ŝajnis krei la trankvila pli limigante, kaj la trankvila sono de Londono estis keil la notu de la malproksime orgeno.En la centro de la ĉambro, kuna al easel, staris la kompleta portreto de junulo viro de tre persona beleco, kaj en antaŭe, malgranda distanco aparte, sidis la artisto li mem, Basil Hallward, kies neatendia malapero antaŭ jaroj kaŭzita, tiam, publika ekscito, kaj tiom da strangaj konjektoj. Li rigardis la kompateman kaj belan bildon kiun li kopiis en lia arto, rideto de plezuro transirita lia vizaĝo, kaj daŭris tie. Sed li subite sidis alta, kaj, fermado lia okuloj, metitia lia finroj sur la palpebroj, kvazaŭ li serĉis kaptado de liaj pensoj stranga sonĝo, pri kiu li povis vekiĝi.

“Ĝi estas viaj plej bona laboro, Basil, la plej bona afero vi iam ajn faris,” diris Sinjoro Henry languide. “Vi devas sendu ĝin venonta jaro al la Grosvenor. La Akademio esta tro granda kaj tro vulgara. La Grosvenor estas la sola loko.”

“Mi ne pensas mi volas sendu ĝi ie ajn,” li respondis, ĵetante lia kapo en tiu stranga maniero tio kutimus faru lia amikoj ridu ĉe li en Oxford. “Ne: mi ne sendu ie ajn.”

Sinjoro Henry levis siajn brovojn, kaj regardas lin kun miro tra la maldika bluo nobuj de fumo tio kurbigata en tiaj fantazaj ŝraŭboj de lia peza opio-pafita cigareoj. “Ne sendu ie ajn? Mia kara kunulo, kial? Ĉu vi havas kialon? Kio nepara homoj pentristoj estas. Vi faras ion ajn en la mondo por akiri reputacion. Tuj kiam vi havas unu, vi ŝajnas voli forĵeti ĝin. Estas stulta pri vi, por tie estas unu aĵo en la mondo pli malbona ol parolita pri, kaj tio estas ne parolita pri. Pentrarto kiel ĉi tio, volus starigu vin super ĉiuj junuloj en Anglio, kaj koleri la maljunulojn, se maljunuloj kapablas emocii.”


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Wed May 01, 2019 7:51 am
Toboldlygo wrote a review...



Hey there! Toboldlygo here for a review. Let's get this out the Green Room, shall we?

First, a disclaimer: I don't speak Esperanto. Unfortunately, I can't be much help to you with that. However, I am fluently bilingual (English and Italian), and am learning Portuguese, Swedish, and American Sign Language, so I can probably give you some generally helpful tips on translating.

I actually took a class in translation techniques, and I'm going to tell you right off the bat that, in general, you want to translate things from your second language to your first. I'm not saying you shouldn't practice translating works from English to Esperanto, just that the translating convention is something to keep in mind should you want to do translations professionally.

The second big rule to translation is to be bicultural, not just bilingual. For example, because I'm bicultural American and Italian, I can translate works from Italian into English. And again, this doesn't mean you shouldn't be doing these translation exercises, but unless you are bicultural American/English and Esperanto, you should keep in mind that you will have additional challenges. For example, say you're bilingual but not bicultural and you're translating an Italian piece that contains the phrase "il gatto ci cova." Now, because you speak Italian, you understand that the phrase means, "The cat lays an egg." This apparently is funny-sounding to Americans, but in Italy, it is like saying something smells fishy. Being bicultural, you understand the references and cultural expressions of the original and target language, and you can adjust the translation accordingly. If you're not bicultural, just keep in mind you may need to do additional research at times.

Another important thing to keep in mind is that you don't always want to simply translate word for word, sentence for sentence. It's better to slightly alter a translation in order to make it more understandable for your target language. So, using the example above, I wouldn't event try to translate "il gatto ci cova" for an American audience, I would simply state "something smells fishy" and leave it at that. This is one reason Google translate is so terrible, because they don't understand things like culture and dialect and they just translate the words, which makes it all sound funny when it's translated.

Overall, well done on putting this work out there! It can be challenging to put a second language out there, so I'm impressed. Keep up the good work!

Happy Writing (and translating!)!

Toboldlygo






Thanks for the tips! I'll keep them in mind.





Thanks for the tips! I'll keep them in mind.



Toboldlygo says...


Anytime! I just wish I could have been more help for you.





No it's good! the part about not directly translating word-for-word and working around weird native language details was interesting and very helpful!



Toboldlygo says...


Glad to hear it. :)



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Sun Apr 28, 2019 12:00 pm
DougalOfBiscuits wrote a review...



So, this is going to be a difficult thing to review. I'd leave it for someone who knows the language, but given this has been in the Green Room so long nobody on the site does, so I guess I'm not stepping on any toes at this point.

Is there a reason you chose to mention that it had homoerotic themes? For a start I'm pretty sure I remember everyone fancying Dorian so there may well have been, plus, I mean, it's Oscar Wilde. This just seems kinda irrelevant. Like, it was also a brilliant experiment in gothic horror and a comment on didacticism in art. I also don't want to sound too harsh though, just like, get a bit jumpy when people choose to specifically highlight that something is totally not gay... (to clarify, I saw your avatar was Josie Whittaker as the Doctor and realised you were probably cool :P still curious though. i think it was also controversial because it displayed wanton behaviour as well)

I also seem to remember Dorian getting himself into a lot of that bother xD

I was going to ask why you chose to translate this particular portion but I did some google translating and realised this is the opening of the novel. It might be interesting to choose a particular passage, unless that is actually what you've done. Then your translation could also be interesting in terms of its content, and it would be an artistic choice on your part about which part of the novel is significant.

Lastly, if I'm following along with the original right, there should be a new paragraph at "En la centro de la ĉambro, kuna al easel".

Hope this helps,
Biscuits






Hey, thanks for the review! Yeah, I chose to mention that it had "homoerotic themes" to show how goddamn jumpy the Victorians were about that. Speaking as a Certified Gay, from a Homosexual Viewpoint, highlighting that something is "not gay" seems a bit out-of-character from me, I admit. I just found it weird that it was called out for homosexual behaviour when there wasn't in the book??? besides the part where Basil is like "naH i'vE neVeR loVed a WomAn," which I suppose can be explicitly interpreted as gay, and like you said, the writer is the King Gay as well, but i dunno ajkfhsjsjsjsksks
and yes jodie whittaker !!
I dunno about the artistic significance of this because I just needed a thing to do in Civics class and translating kept me both in-practice and entertained, and this passage just had all of the pompous adjectives that are fun to translate
~thanks for listening to my TED talk, have a nice day~




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