I don't know how to communicate my emotions properly without ink and paper. I'll spill my guts within the lines of these pages deeming every syllable inadequate because I'm not able to tell you how I feel. I thought I had a handle on it until that spring day when you packed your things, left a note and an empty void in my bed. After a year of waiting for this loneliness to subside, the only thing I've learned is that I can't sleep at night. I've replaced your presence with something more tangible like drink for comfort and people for distraction because your memory lingers in my mind when I'm alone and the moon offers little advice.
I've tried to make sense of all this through complex notions but I've found that I'm perplexed by my own emotions. Since you've left, I've found that my daily routine isn't much of a routine anymore, more like a convoluted response to a question that remains to be answered. If this is what it means to be broken, then tell my bones that I'm taking an early vacation because compound fractures don't hurt nearly as bad as the cracks that we choose to silence with super glue and words of encouragement.
I perceive existence through this lackluster perspective due to the loss of your presence. I'll cope with this heartache through endless petition and prayer to my God and writing these thoughts, these things I lacked the courage to say when I never lacked the time, in this journal of mine filled with watered down apprehension and clear intentions.
I don't regret the vows I made. I don't regret the time we wasted arguing. I don't regret meeting you. I don't regret telling you those three words. I don't regret how things are now. I'm not angry and I don't hate you. You did what you had to do and I don't blame you.
" My love could not cover what you needed, but at least I could remember moments where I was what you believed in; and I made enough mistakes to learn that that mattered. "
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129,092 Literary Works • 671,501 Reviews
I am in love with this poem. With this writing. I am truly in love with it.
I feel like i can hold the emotion in this piece in my heart; every line carries some kind of baggage that makes my heart hurt. This is good writing, not because of the structure or grammar or wording, but because it makes me feel something. Your writing made me feel something.
Now with the stanzas and the structure, you could make it in poem form. From what I know, this is currently just a really nicely writting piece of writing, like an entry or a blog post. The division of lines and the breaks between the paragraphs are what make poetry the way it is, you know?
Overall, this is amazing. I love it and I am a fan. Keep it up angel.
I am in love with this poem. With this writing. I am truly in love with it.
I feel like i can hold the emotion in this piece in my heart; every line carries some kind of baggage that makes my heart hurt. This is good writing, not because of the structure or grammar or wording, but because it makes me feel something. Your writing made me feel something.
Now with the stanzas and the structure, you could make it in poem form. From what I know, this is currently just a really nicely writting piece of writing, like an entry or a blog post. The division of lines and the breaks between the paragraphs are what make poetry the way it is, you know?
Overall, this is amazing. I love it and I am a fan. Keep it up angel.
I am in love with this poem. With this writing. I am truly in love with it.
I feel like i can hold the emotion in this piece in my heart; every line carries some kind of baggage that makes my heart hurt. This is good writing, not because of the structure or grammar or wording, but because it makes me feel something. Your writing made me feel something.
Now with the stanzas and the structure, you could make it in poem form. From what I know, this is currently just a really nicely writting piece of writing, like an entry or a blog post. The division of lines and the breaks between the paragraphs are what make poetry the way it is, you know?
Overall, this is amazing. I love it and I am a fan. Keep it up angel.
Tigerlilly here to review!
I'm going to start off by welcoming you to YWS! This piece is an incredible way to start off, and I must say, I'm truly baffled by your writing skills. I love the vocabulary and the entire structure of it. Its just so perfect the way it is that it makes it hard for me to review it!
Either way, I'll do my best.
I find it a little odd for this to be marked in poetry, and perhaps its just the entire structure of it. I really love the way it is, I just feel it doesn't quite fit in with poetry...
I can't find anything wrong with grammar nor spelling, and overall, this was just a really powerful and incredible piece of writing... Well done! Please keep writing! I look forward to reading more of your works!
To begin with, your stanzas. When writing poetry you need to group it differently for an example.
The King was sick. His cheek was red
And his eye was clear and bright;
He ate and drank with a kingly zest;
This is from The Enchanted Shirt by John Hay
So on and so forth. I suggest reading poetry and studding how the stanzas are, you'll get the hang of it, I promise! A good book you can buy at a local book store is, The Best Loved Poems Of The American People. This book if full of wonderful poems!
In this how the person felt, it's really touching. You did a wonderful job, you made the reader really connect and feel what the narratier felt. You are a very skilled writer, you have a amazing talent and lots of potential! I hope to see more of your works in the near future.
-AdelVise-