Hello TheNihilist, steampowered here for a review! Since this piece is so short, this will probably end up being quite a short review, but I’ll do my best to leave you with some good quality feedback.
Whilst you obviously have quite a command of the English language, I’m afraid I don’t feel like this piece of writing was particularly coherent. It feels like this should definitely have some kind of story behind it but you seem to have got more caught up with how you’re phrasing things than the meaning behind it.
So, I obviously managed to figure out from the text that the narrator is watching the scene from above, but this doesn’t tell me that much about them. At first I believed the narrator to be some kind of bird, but from the way you’ve written it, it could just as easily be a person standing at the top of a building (which seems to be more likely, considering you mentioned a staircase of solitude, which implies they are walking to a lower level)
One nitpicky thing I think I should probably pick up on is your use of “..” – it should be three dots, not two.
Hopefully this review was helpful – feel free to let me know if you ever want anything else reviewed and I’ll be more than happy to review it for you. Keep writing!
-steam-
Points: 455
Reviews: 359
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