Published July 24, 2011
Starting out simply, we laugh and we smile:
All the world's a joy and all of us joyous...
Complications arise, doubt starts to form:
Treasures are flung about, our minds forming the tempest...
Rising above, all yearns to be free:
Charm seeps back in as the soul breaks its slumber...
Wafting throughout, becoming as one:
'Tis vicarious as the end dawns near...
Happiness, the essence, is sought
the world over, though most can't begin to seek.
The happy-go-lucky, the joyous, the loving all
drift merrily, peacefully down the stream
of happiness, expanding its banks so that
all may pass through; of yet, 'tis not an ocean...
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
138,938 Literary Works • 672,331 Reviews
I really liked the theme of the poem. The only thing that made me a little uneasy was the punctuation of the first stanza-- the colons and the ...s slightly detracted from the flow of the poem. Other than that, I enjoyed the vivid imagery. Keep on writing!
I liked the refreshing topic. There are not to many GOOD poems about happiness that capture the essence of what it's really like without sounding cheesy and ridiculous. I thought you did an excellent job. Keep up the writing