Hello. I think that this is a lovely topic to write about. Rather than just human mishaps you know? So for that, this already has great potential. I think that the words you used were simple and alright but since you made this poem rhyme, it has to be in a way that this flows well. The rhymes were forced in some stanzas, almost as if you added just a random end to a line to make it rhyme with the second. This may not be true but that's how it sounds if you force the rhyme in. Anyway, it'll help to read your poem aloud and see if it sounds flow-y... And again, lovely theme here and also everything was vivid, which is something I really love about poetry.
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Reviews: 261
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