Chapter 1 - Dying Reality
Terry
The freezing cold atmosphere never changes. It almost seems like the seasons have come to a stop, but they never started. As far as the histories go, since the beginning of time, when people first found themselves on Irrian, Zephyr Highlands has been a frostbitten region, lying solemnly in seemingly endless winter. It might be warmer, if not for our loss of magic millions of years ago. The kingdom of Irrian used to be filled to the brim with magic. Although magic has been poured into certain objects, it’s impossible to find any more. No one has magical abilities.
Zephyr Highlands isn’t a particularly enjoyable place to live, but those who are born here often find themselves remaining for their entire life. Zephyr Highlands is one of the most advanced regions—because of magic, we learned to control electricity, which lead to the creation of inventions like computers and video games, of which I myself have never used. We’re not the only region with technology, though, and others are more advanced.
I don’t want to stay in this region. I used to be bound to here by my parents— they didn’t want a young boy like me wandering off. I don’t like thinking about my parents, though. They’ve been gone since I was seven years old, and I’m fourteen now. Ever since then, I’ve wanted to leave this region and travel the world. I want to discover what happened to my parents, the reason why they disappeared in the forest seven years ago. I wander through the silent Carlum Forest, my footsteps forming imprints on the clear snow. My warm blue coat and brown pants keep me warm. A scarf is wrapped around my neck.
Nothing else appears to move here at first glance. I look into the sky and notice tiny bits of snow falling to the ground. A branch from a tree falls onto the snowy quilt. This forest is so dense that the little amount of sunlight we get here barely reaches the ground. The light that does seep through creates a strangely comfortable glow in the darkness.
I think I'll go visit my friend Oliver in Icepoint instead of just wandering aimlessly here in the woods. Icepoint always reminds me of bad memories. Even when I try to twist those thoughts into positive memories, they always turn back around. It takes a while to reach the edge of the forest, and I am shivering by the time the sun finally comes into vision. I slowly walk through the brisk fog.
Gray buildings are forming in the distance. My footprints line up and down the snow on their own, forming an instantly distinguishable path behind me. I walk into Icepoint at a leisurely pace and make a beeline for Oliver’s house. Kids my age are having snowball fights with each other. They hardly even recognize me, much less notice me. I walk over to the two story house that Oliver lives in and knock on the door. His mother appears.
"Oh, Terry. It's good to see you. Most boys your age would still be asleep on a Saturday morning like this," she says. "Are you here to see Oliver?"
I nod.
"He's still in bed." She steps out of the way, going into the kitchen. I enter and climb the stairs swiftly. Oliver always had a habit of sleeping in— not like there would be any difference in his energy if he didn't, though.
I open the door and stomp to his bedside. He still doesn't awaken. After gently shaking him, he ever so slowly raises his head and opens his brown eyes.
"Terry?"
"Come on, Oliver, wake up."
"Do you have something planned for today?" he sleepily says. He yawns and sits up. He's wearing blue and white striped pyjamas.
"No, not really. But you can't just keep on sleeping like this. You have to seize the day, my friend! There could be exciting and interesting adventures to have out in the world around us!" I stretch my arms out to the side, as if presenting the region itself, waiting right outside the frosted window pane.
"There’s only a boring, freezing, snow covered city where everyone is living their depressing lives," he replies.
"In that case, let's go see if we can fix their problems! Or we could go see if anyone wants their snow shovelled. For money, naturally! There's plenty of people that need our help,” I say.
"But I just want to stay here in my bed. After all, as soon as I get out of bed, I'm going to be extremely cold,” Oliver says.
"I'll go grab your coat. You put on your clothes while I grab it."
"Fine,” he says, sighing.
I leave the room and come back with his brown coat, handing it to him. He's now wearing a blue and red shirt. He puts on his coat, zips it up and then looks through his bookshelves.
"I was hoping to read a book from this mystery series I've been reading," he says, pulling out of a book and setting it beside his bed. He heads over to his automatic coffee machine and makes a cup, sipping it slowly. "It's so cold today…like every other day. Please, just leave me alone, Terry. I want to enjoy peace and quiet today and read a good book with some hot coffee."
"I'll leave you alone completely tomorrow if we can have some fun today. Come on, I promise it'll be entertaining."
"Okay, fine."
I grab a gray scarf and hand it to him, or else he'll complain about the cold. He sets down his cup of coffee. We head out the door to be overtaken by the cold.
I've had thoughts of leaving this city since a very young age. This is the coldest region in all of Irrian. It's also the biggest region, but the one with the most unused space. Nobody wants to live here, but despite that, everyone who does live here never wants to leave. The citizens of Icepoint aren't fond of adventure, and they seem perfectly content living their lives in the cold atmosphere. Oliver and I have different plans than that.
We stroll through the city. Nobody recognizes me, but they all know Oliver because his mother brags about him. They see him in the occasional times that he goes outside. Here in Icepoint, there is no school, so kids are able to do whatever they want. But some kids do receive education from their parents.
"Do you need some help shovelling in front of the shop?" I ask a lady. She’s shovelling in front of the grocery store.
"Sure. You can both have somethin’ for free if you help me shovel," she says. We shovel along with her until all the snow is in the nearby alleyway. She unlocks the shop and we begin searching.
"I'll get these hot chocolate packets," Oliver says. "I'm very fond of the delicious and hot taste of hot chocolate. Especially in a cold place like this."
"And I'll have a bag of iced potatoes." Iced potatoes are kept nicely in stock here, since it's one of the vegetables that our region grows. Zephyr Highlands is known for its frozen fruit and vegetables, since grown food instantly becomes frozen. Despite that, people absolutely love it.
We get our food and then walk through the city, without a single goal in the world.
"We should go and have some fun somewhere, Oliver. Want to come to the forest with me? We can go fishing. It isn't as cold in the forest, since wind can't even get inside it," I explain.
"I don't really like eating fish, though….but I'll come anyway," he says. "I like fishing. It’s interesting." His breath is visible in the cold. We trudge through the snow to the forest and reach my cabin. I've set up a storage shed beside it. I keep a little garden by it. I grow frozen vegetables. Oliver’s dad got them, since he works at the local farm. They are only able to grow thanks to magic—some of the last magic in this entire world.
I live in a cabin out in the woods because of my parents disappearance. Why am I not living at an orphanage? I’d rather not remind myself. I open the doors to the cabin and we head inside. I grab a toy sword that I like using.
"This is my favourite weapon! I'm pretty skilled at using it. Too bad there aren't any monsters to fight against, though.” I grab the fishing rods and some bait and we head out to the river that runs through the forest, the Erine River. The rivers in Irrian are magically energized and never freeze.
I hand one of the fishing rods to Oliver and we sit on the icy rocks and try to fish, looking for salmon in the river. But we can't seem to catch anything today. A jackrabbit is scurrying about. Oliver takes notice of it as well and we both walk over to it. Oliver likes cute things. But as we approach, the rabbit lunges and bonks into Oliver, knocking him over. Oliver sits there, mouth wide open, stunned at the rabbit’s actions.
Rabbits never attack anyone in the forest. So why is a rabbit suddenly attacking Oliver? I draw my toy sword to fight the rabbit Oliver grabs a shovel on the ground. I think I left that last time I was convinced there were jewels under there. The rabbit continues attempting to attack us. Oliver stands up and whacks the rabbit with the shovel. The scuffle continues until we’ve whacked the sense back into it. The rabbit wanders off.
"Why did that bunny attack me?" Oliver says.
"I don't know. Let's go and check on the other animals in the forest. I hope they aren’t acting like this. There are plenty of other animals living around here," I suggest. Tiptoeing silently, we check around to see if there are any other animals.
I notice one of the ptarmigans that lives around here. They like it here because of the cold climate. The bird flies over to us and pecks at us, much like the rabbit. After we attack it, it goes back to its normal behavior. The bird flies away in fear. Just what is going on here?
"This is getting kind of weird. I thought you told me that you loved feeding the bunnies here in the forest," Oliver says.
"I do feed them," I reply. "But something's happened to them. Something that shouldn't be happening. Let's get out of here before we're attacked by anything else."
On our way out, we find even more crazed animals. Even some squirrels, climbing down the trees, attack us. We return back to the city.
"What is going on here? Stuff like this doesn't happen often," I say. "Do you think we should tell somebody?"
"I don't know. Do you think we should?" Oliver asks. "I'm sorry, but I value your opinion more than my own."
"We should consult the mayor about this problem. Hardly no one travels out of the city, so no one's going to notice that the animals have become hostile. The mayor is the only one we can trust to not tell anyone else about it," I explain.
We trudge back to Icepoint. Oliver’s mother makes a delicious lunch. We decide to talk to the mayor tomorrow, perhaps after further investigation. I say goodbye to Oliver and head back outside to have adventures alone, without my best friend.
* * *
Terry
I can tell that I'm dreaming. I've gone through this dream so many times, over and over again. I know it too well. But I don't mind reliving this reality. They are happy memories. Dreams of my life before I started living in a cabin in the Carlum Forest.
A house in Icepoint towers over the rest. My rich parents lived their lives here. I never learned how they made all that money. And I, as their only child, lived with them. My parents were kind and caring people. They were the richest people in the city and had an enormous following. They got a private teacher for me that was paid to teach me all kinds of things. My parents spoiled me. They bought toys for me and got me whatever I wanted, no matter what. I would never do any chores. And I thought that every child my age lived like me. When I left the house, they would make sure I was warm, and I hardly left the house anyway. They were overprotective of me, and they loved me, perhaps a little bit too much.
And then one day, they decided they wanted to go for a walk together. They wanted to go to the woods, the place that they supposedly first met, and walk around. They wanted me to come with them, but I didn't want to go out into the freezing cold, so I asked them to stay and play with me. But in the end, they said they would be back in forty minutes and then left me at the house. None of our servants were there at the time, so I was alone in the house.
I missed my parents. I was so overly attached to them that I counted the minutes and looked at pictures of them we had taken and everything, like they had never left the house. To me, the only reality was our house. There was nothing outside. And my parents and I were never supposed to leave it. But then the timer rang, and they still weren’t back. Staring at the clock, I decided to give it five more minutes. Ten more. Fifteen. Twenty and twenty-five. I couldn't stand it anymore. I rushed out of our house in desperation to find them, shouting, "Mommy! Daddy!"
I reached the woods and found their footsteps. I searched through the woods while shouting. I searched all over the woods, but I couldn't find them anywhere. My tears covered the forest floor that night. I was devastated. I couldn't live my life without them.
I went back into the city hoping to gather a search party. They loved my parents enough that they would definitely help me. But when I went back to Icepoint and talked to some of the people I knew, they didn’t recognize me. They didn’t know who my parents were. When I went back to my house, it was no longer there. It was replaced with a hospital that was under construction.
My parents were gone and no one remembered me. And that was when I was seven years old. The people of Icepoint were so poor and lazy that none of them wanted to take me in. And then, that same day, I bumped into someone who recognized seeing me, and vaguely remembered my parents. Oliver.
But I realized something. I had been protected by my parents from the outside world for such a long time. They had taught me everything I needed to know for the future. But I was truly clueless about anything. I didn't know how washing machines worked. Oliver showed me, but I still couldn’t figure it out. I couldn't wash dishes, or do anything. So I decided to leave Oliver’s family, only taking a little bit of equipment from them, including an axe. I went to the forest and decided to build a cabin on the spot where their footprints were last seen.
I taught myself how to use the axe, and then Oliver and I built the cabin with help from his father. I learned how to build and made a second floor to the cabin. It was a comfortable place. I built a fireplace and furniture. I decided I would stay in the woods and learn about the world myself. But every night, I would cry for my parents, thinking that they might return from if they heard my voice here.
I went into Icepoint every single day to play with Oliver. We had adventures and travelled all over Zephyr Highlands. And seven years passed, and now here I am, fourteen-years old. When Oliver is eighteen years old, the two of us are going to go adventuring across the world. That's when he'll be old enough to leave home. We're going to travel to all eleven regions of Irrian. Or twelve, or...well, I don’t really know how many there are.
My conscious dream ends, and I wake up crying. They are memories that I don't want to remember.
I think I’ll take a walk outside and get some fresh air.
* * *
Terry
My body feels smaller—lighter than before. I'm still in the forest, the snow on the ground freezing me to the bone. I lift my face to notice a hand. Further up, there are two faces.
A man who has the exact same nose as me, and a woman with similar pointy ears. They both have brown hair.
"Terry, what are you doing? Taking a nap in the woods? Is it a nice place to take a nap?" the man says.
"Come on, get up," the woman says. The man is reaching out his hand to me. I grab it and he helps me stand up.
"Let's go back home, son. There's a book I've been itching to read to you," he says.
Son?
And then I recognize the two. The portrait I've kept in my room for all this time. My parents. What are they doing here now?
"But…but I thought that you went missing. I'm fourteen years old, right? And I'm sad because the two of you are gone. This is a dream! It has to be!" I shout.
"No, that's not true," the man replies. "You must have had a nightmare where we went missing. We were just coming back from our walk in the woods. Looks like you came looking for us, huh?"
Of course. The life I've been having is just a dream. This is reality—I fell asleep in the forest in an endless dream, and now I've just woken up. My parents are still alive. Everyone remembers us.
I'm so happy now. My parents are here. They never went missing. Glancing down at my body, my clothes are childish and rich again. I look like I belong to the royal family. My hair is cut short. It feels weird to be seven years old again. My seven-year dream felt so real…
Dad gives me a piggyback ride to Icepoint. We talk more about my dream and they try to calm me down. My parents are truly here. My dad pats me on the head and we walk through the snow. He's always made sure that I'm never cold.
I'm surprised by how much I learned in the dream. But I truly do feel like I am seven-years old again. It’s a strange and disorienting experience.
We finally reach the city. I recognize some buildings from before they were destroyed, while some buildings are only recently built but in my dream present are old and wrecked.
Our house looks exactly the same. It’s the same elegant mansion. My parents knew it was too much, but they insisted on living in comfort even though it meant flaunting their wealth. We go inside the house. The warm sitting room still has the same fireplace, crackling brightly. Some of the magic is still present now that I've found out my seven years was a dream.
Maybe I can try to prevent the magic from disappearing. Or perhaps there's no chance of preventing it. It has died out in my “dream life”, but it’s present in reality.
"We're back home. So, want me to read you that book?" my dad says.
"Sure, Daddy!" I say, smiling. My dad and mom are finally back. We head upstairs to my room with its elegant chairs and enormous, spacious bed. I have a fireplace in my own room to keep me warm during the night. Shelves of books are everywhere, from history volumes to fiction books. Some of them are the same ones that Oliver always reads.
My father grabs one of the books. "This one is an excellent story. Luckily, it's not too long, so it won't be terribly hard to read. It's a story about the past of the kingdom. A legend. It was so long ago, in the first years of existence for Irrian. I'm sure you'll love it."
"I'm looking forward to hearing it!” I exclaim. Back downstairs, I take in more of the appearance of my new reality. Velvet walls and a carpet give the sitting room a unique look.. Attached to the vaulted ceiling is a chandelier.
I start crying.
"What's wrong, Terry?" Daddy asks.
"I feel like I've been trapped in a seven-year dream where you and Mom didn't exist. I was alone. I lived in the forest until I was fourteen. I was forgotten by the people living in this city, and had to live a freezing cold life in the woods when you two both disappeared. Seeing all of this after being trapped there, I'm just so happy…I have you and Mommy back," I explain, the tears dripping down my cheeks. I can't stop them.
"You don't have to worry about that any more, Terry. Your mother and I would never abandon you like that. Regular life is going to continue on like it always does," Dad replies. "We won't go out on walks in the woods without you anymore."
Dad reads the story to me by the crackling fire. With these warm clothes and the warm fire, I'm comfortable. I don’t have to worry about anything anymore.
"Okay, I'm going to start reading," he says, smiling. "Once upon a time, there was the creation of a planet called Irrian. This planet was instantly filled with life. This life was called humans. These humans were capable of completing amazing, unworldly feats called psychokinesis. People became well trained in these abilities. They interacted with other creatures, such as Dwales."
I'm intently listening.
"But, one day, strange monsters made out of shadows appeared. They began attacking people, and ordinary people couldn’t do anything against them. People with magical abilities rose up to strike them down, but they were hard to defeat. Nobody knew exactly how or why they were created. This is the story of how those creatures came into creation and how they were struck down by powerful mages."
The story continues along, and eventually it becomes evening. While he’s reading I accidentally drift off to sleep. I don’t hear the rest of the story. I wake up to discover he’s carrying me to bed and settling me down, tucking me in.
Once again, I start crying again.
"Mommy, Daddy, you're finally back," I cry out loud. My mom gives me a kiss on the forehead. "Don't worry. You're going to have sweet dreams tonight," Dad says.
They leave the room, turning off the light and kissing me goodnight.
All of that was simply just a dream. This is my real life. And I'm going to be enjoying it. I'm not going to lose a single moment with my family.
“Wake up, Terry!”
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140,138 Literary Works • 673,032 Reviews
Hi!
So this is a great chapter you have here! It was definitely an interesting start that raises quite a few questions to make me want to read on!
Okay, I'm going to kick this review off with a couple of little nitpicks before I get to what I loved about this piece. So here goes:
Here you have started two sentences the with Zephyr Highlands, so maybe you could try swapping the sentence starters about to create more variety?
Again there's repetition, this time of the word 'warm'. Maybe you could use another word?
Okay, so here and in a couple of other spaces your speech doesn't quite sound very natural. What I mean by that is that if you were having a conversation in real life I don't think you would talk like this, as it resembles written language more than spoken if you get my meaning. Especially coming from two boys who apparently seem to be younger. So using the above example it might be more realistic for him to say simply 'I like hot chocolate' or something along those lines.
Also, in your description of the place you have already explained a couple of times that it is a cold environment, I kind of dont think you need to reiterate this again.
The second part of the chapter was definitely interesting, the whole way through I was convinced that the second life was the dream, however, I did begin to question it slightly at the end when Terry went to bed. Which is good, I love the element of mystery you have going on.
I would also perhaps suggest breaking your chapter down into two parts as it is quite long, but that's up to you
Overall though this was a great chapter! It starts off an intresting start to your story. I'm left wondering what is going to happen next. I'm also curious as to how magic is going to fit into this story, which I'm fairly sure it might at some point... Idk, maybe that's what made the animals start to attack them? Because I'm not quite sure about what's going to happen next that's what makes me want to read on! Which is great.
Long story short, you have a great beginning to a story, and I can't wait to see what happens next
Burn
Thanks for the review! You had some good points. I'll edit it accordingly.
Hi, Terry my name is jessiebear and I am here to give you a great long review. Oh and if I say anything that is rood in this review please tell me because I don’t mean to be rood at all.
I like the characters so fare to I like there different personalities. I know if all of your characters had the same personality's people will just think the story is lame and boring. So I think you are doing a great job with your story so fare.
Okay let’s get started with what I like about the chapter.
I like the name of the story I think so fare it soots what I have read so great choices of name.
Okay I am now going to start the review.
Okay the words witch are in bold are the words that have been corrected. Oh and like the last chapter I am going to go through the hull of chapter 2 and fixed your spelling mistakes. So it will be long okay let’s start.
There was only a little bit of spelling mistakes so that is a really good start to a great story. Okay this is really good but I think you can describe a little bit more in some places in the chapter like the characters in your story I think you can add little decryptions about what they look like some times when one of them is done talking. And I think you can add some smell and touch to. But that was just a suggestion. Oh and don't get me wrong your story so fare is really good. I hope I helped you.
So that is all thank you.
From your new friend jessiebear.
Thanks for the review! I'll take what you said into consideration.
Great I am glad you agree with what I said. But don't get me wrong I loved your chapter and I am really looking for word to the next chapter.
I hope you will let me no when it is done, And good luck with chapter 2 by the way.
and if you have any other work you would like a review on then don't be afraid to ask me. Because I would love to review more of your work.
oh and you keep on righting great work and never stop because you are really good at it.
Oh and thank you for following me. Oh and I all most for got to tell you welcome to YWS I hope you like it her and good like with getting your first star.