You're like coffee to me.
Should be giving me energy
but since my heart is weak you only make it beat.
Beat so fast that I'm afraid it will explode
and my eyes will be forever closed.
Nevertheless, the next day I take another sip
because I got myself addicted to it.
It's both so sweet and bitter
what a perfect mixture.
Yet each night I play the game
"will my heart be able to take?"
or will this be my last sip of your 'caffeine'
that will cause supernova inside of me.
No matter how long the day has gone
no matter what I digested throughout
that strong taste still remains on my tongue
making me rethink of what I have done.
So is it a curse or a bless?
Today I choose to not know
and once again treat myself
to this perfect magical drink of yours.
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139,603 Literary Works • 672,615 Reviews
I found this interesting.As a poet I feel like this piece says alot,Like anyone could read it out loud and it would still be just as powerful.
Sincerely your fellow YWSW
PS keep writing!
Hey there! First off, I feel like this is a song or could be! The comparison between coffee and whoever this is about is an interesting analogy. Caffeine often has the ability to increase one's heartbeat, and so can love. I never thought to compare them before, and this poetic interaction is really different! Very clever! Just like caffeine, love can be addictive, and you really sell the two intertwining. The use of the words "sweet and bitter" almost have an entrende effect. I also like the use of italicizing specific words: "coffee," "perfect," "caffeine," and "yours." If you focus on those words alone, it really encapsulates the poem's overall theme. I appreciated the way you describe how you cannot remove the taste from your tongue, despite consuming other things. This is a powerful way to describe how even if you move on from love, sometimes you still cannot let previous lovers go and they linger in your heart. The questions of "Will my heart be able to take or will this be my last sip" and "Is it a curse or a bless" really sell the contemplation regarding being haunted and in love still. Sometimes we do not have the power to resist and especially anyone who loves coffee (ME!) knows that after a while you eventually feel the need to have it every day to get that daily "fix." The ending of this really showcases that well. Overall, this was a nice read and made me want to drink coffee both figuratively and literally LOL. Take care wherever you are in the world!
hey there! This is loveissourgrapes and I ma here to review/comment on your poem. It's so romantic but it's not that obvious at the same time. I like it. It is cheesy but it isn't obvious that it is. I have thought that do some people think that their partner is like coffee, then I saw this poem hehe. I see that you are really good at writing romantic poems. @TenderFalling4U, keep it up!
I can smell coffee while reading this stanza, it feels funny. Coffee can give you energy and can make your heart beat very fast too like someone you are in love with can do the same thing too. The flow of the writing is great too. Although, I want to know what type of poem this is because the first stanza has five lines and the rest have like only four lines. By the way, I love how that some words are in italics to emphasize on the meaning of the line/stanza.
What I like about this poem too is that it depends on the readers' and the writer's perception and how they view the meaning of the poem. Is it sad, toxic, or is the narrator just really in love with a person? The person is addicted but the person the narrator is in love with feels like the perfect one for them. The last two lines of this stanza are my fave in this poem.
The metaphor of the supernova explosion like the narrator feels like exploding because of the person they are addicted to. The first stanza kind of makes it sound happy but then when you read further more, it gets sadder and sadder.
This stanza feels both sad or happy. Like the strong taste is like the thoughts of that person in the narrator's head. Actually, to me, I think that drinking coffee is like a guilty pleasure. And this stanza tells that it is.
You can see that the narrator doesn't know if they should regret what they did or not. Coffee is actually a drink that can do a lot of things to do. Like you said, it is a magical drink.
Over all, this was great to read. I don't see any errors in the grammar or even spelling. Keep it up! Have a nice day/night!