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Young Writers Society



Alexandrite chapter two: μυστικός part 3

by Tadatori53


Chapter 2: μυστικός (Secret)

part 3

I sat up and turned toward Brandon to make sure he wasn’t hurt and to help if I could. I was certified in first-aid, after all. “Are you okay, Brandon?” I decided it was fine to talk now sense they probably all ready knew we were there.

He sat up with a groan. “I’m fine,” he said softly as he brushed off the dirt on his jeans. “Are you?”

I nodded as I helped him stand up. I turned my back to him to see Damon standing right in front of us.

“Garnet?! Brandon?! What are you doing here?!” Damon asked frantically as he stepped back slightly.

Brandon answered before I had a chance to. “We can be where we want to be!” He said, determined to not make it his fault.

“Damon, Nori, what do you mean by witches?” I asked, still unsure if it was a club, sport team, or something else.

“We were talking about a, um, well, a sort of club you can call it,” Nori said, adverting her eyes away from mine. So maybe witches were the name of a club, then.

“What about ‘lab rat’?” Brandon questioned Damon from beside me. I guess my plan of getting Brandon to trust Damon didn’t work out so well.

“It’s the name of my new club. I left theirs because something came up and I decided I didn’t want to go back, though I didn’t know Nori when I was in her club because she just joined,” Damon said smoothly. “I want to live my life like I was never there because I like this so much better.”

“What kind of club is it?” I asked curiously.

“Mine’s an English type club where we study books and plays like The Crucible so we call ourselves witches,” Nori said with a smile. “I didn’t want to tell you earlier because I wasn’t sure if I was going to stay in it or not.”

“The one I recently joined is a lab club but it’s not at this school, like Nori’s. They’re both located at another school. We’re the lab rats, though I’m considered a failed one, as of right now, because I’m new. Nori’s club doesn’t enjoy my presence ever sense I decided not to go back,” Damon said as he put his hands in his hoodie pocket coolly.

“Oh,” was the only intelligent thing I could think of to say.

“An English and Science club? That sounds…boring,” Brandon deadpanned as he brushed his bangs back with his fingers.

“You wouldn’t know, would you?” Nori said as she put her hands on her hips. “You don’t do any extracurricular activities,” she said. I didn’t like the way she was talking to my best friend so I decided to cut in.

“At least he doesn’t learn about or act like witches,” I said in his defense.

“What’s wrong with witches?!” Nori asked with a slightly flushed face. “They’re a very popular subject, you know!”

“Everything’s wrong with witches,” Damon said with a roll of his eyes. “I, of course, mean your kind and not certain ones.”

Nori looked appalled with her mouth ajar, “Is that an insult?!”

“Last time I checked it was,” Brandon snickered at Damon’s comment. I wondered if it was actually possible for the two of them to be able to get along or even agree on something.

“I’ve had enough of being brought down. At least I’m not a lab rat!” Nori yelled, still flushed.

I could hear Damon gritting his teeth together, restraining himself. He seemed absolutely livid as his clenched and unclenched his fists. His sunglasses still hid his emerald eyes, which I wondered how he got away with that seeing as how it was against the school’s dress code. I watched as he turned away from Nori, holding the strap to his backpack tightly. “Whatever,” He said simply. “I have better places to be than here.”

Nori’s attitude seemed to change completely. She smiled brightly and she waved to Damon, even though his back was turned to her. I wondered if she was bipolar.

I didn’t know how to react to what had just happened. I probably looked like a complete idiot as I just stood there looking dumbfounded.

“Can anyone explain what just happened?” I heard Brandon question beside me. I was happy not to be the only one completely confused.

Nori waved her hand as a sign of dismissal. “Oh, it was nothing! Don’t think too much about it!” I decided to take her advice; I didn’t want to get any more confused than I already was.

Apparently Brandon agreed with me as he shook his head and then looked at me with a sheepish smile. I knew that smile all too well.

“What do you want?” I asked as he adjusted his backpack. Another thing I could tell about him from knowing him so long. He was like an open book to me but sometimes it seemed like I skipped a few pages…

“Can I get a ride home?” He asked with a look of apology. He had his own car but after a resent car accident his old civic was in no condition for driving. I was just happy that he wasn’t hurt; I would gladly give him a ride if it meant he was okay.

“Of course,” I said with a smile. “Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, Nori. My dad will kill me if I’m home much later! He’ll probably think I’m out doing something illegal. I don’t know why he thinks that, though,” I said as I thought about how my dad always made sure I didn’t do anything wrong. What’s strange about that is it always made me want to disobey him. I never did, though. I would be too scared of the aftermath.

“Do you need to go to your locker?” He asked as we headed back into the school; my car was parked on the other side.

I shook my head, “Nope. I don’t have much homework tonight. I just need to get started on that project for psychology,” I said as I glanced toward Brandon, knowing he probably forgot.

“Project?” I was right. I did like the clueless expression on his face.

“Yeah, the one he told us about last week,” I reminded his as his blue eyes seemed to spark with recognition.

“That’s right! I remember,” He said happily. “The one where we have to try and predict what a person’s response is going to be to a certain question?”

I nodded in confirmation. “I’m impressed. You were paying attention?”

“I just remember you telling me about it,” he said truthfully with a goofy grin as he opened the doors to the parking lot for me. His response was expected so I just laughed as I walked outside. “Who are you going to question? Have you decided yet?”

“I’ve decided already,” I said with a smirk. “I’ve also decided not to tell you yet,” I playfully stuck out my tongue.

“I’ll tell you who I’m doing!” Brandon attempted to bargain, his curiosity getting the better of him.

“You’ll just have to wait and find out,” I said secretly as I got into my Vibe and Brandon got into the passengers seat.

As we drove down the road I wondered if tomorrow would be as different as today was. I sure hoped so because it was one of the most interesting days of my life but I somehow knew this was just the beginning of something. I had too many questions and not enough answers for my liking.


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Tue Feb 26, 2008 3:06 am
wildnaturespirit wrote a review...



:D Ok, it really seems like this might be headed somewhere interesting but, your readers may have difficulty staying interested. This part seemed a little bland. Like flounder (you know, like the fish), goes great with lemon though. mmm, yum. So add lemon. T :lol: That was basically me telling you this has potential and if you give it more emotion and description it will be great. Sorry, I havent eaten dinner, yet. :lol: back to buisness, I had trouble picturing the scenes and what is happening. I didnt really feel like i was experiencing the story, there wasnt enough emotion, or description, I didnt think. I really couldnt picture any of what happened. I felt like my eyes were closed and i was just listening to a conversation. There wasn't enough feeling to make the story come to life. That is just the overall feel, but I am interested about what will happen later in the story. :D

Now, some technical things:
"I decided it was fine to talk now sense they probably all ready knew we were there. "
since, not sense. I believe you did this later on too...

"I said secretly as I got into my "
i think you mean secretively. Secretly makes it seem like he is thinking it, and not saying it loud enough for Brandon to hear.

Hope this critique helps. :D





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