16+ Language

Letter to the friend who dumped me because his new girlfriend told him to

Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

Comments & reviews · 3
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This has a strong meaning to it between 2 ex-lovers, one still looks for the other while the other doesn't care what happens to the other lover, no one can ever stay happy forever but there are bigger fish in the sea who are willing to stay by the side of another person for life but the other refuses to find another fish because that previous fish gave they're everything but left in the end.

User avatar
havengr1
Review

You know what. This is relatable. Something very similar happened to me with my friends new girlfriend.

Seen as I'm here to review. I LOVE IT. Your vocab is amazing, like, you could be a walking dictionary. The bullet points make it easy to read and understand. The emotions that you've poured into this are very visible.

There's a couple of commas where full stops should be, but other than that I can't see any issues.
love love love it

Thanks for the review! I'm really glad you like it :)

Any "wrong" punctuation is intentional btw--this is pretty poetic, so I'm more focused on the creative than technical elements. Although I wonder if you might be talking about the semicolons? I just realized that they're kind of hard to distinguish in the font I used, oops XD

User avatar
Stringbean
Comment

Alright, revised a little, this is the fourth (and final?) draft XD



I understand what you're saying, and your comments are valuable, but I'm gonna ignore your advice.
— Roald Dahl