Published July 1, 2011
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Canary word: Present
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138,419 Literary Works • 672,118 Reviews
Amazing!I think it's perfect.Keep up the good work, I mean it!
Okay, first of all. I'm already singing this. It's very haunting for me, it feels as though a group of men are marching towards their death, all singing this haunting melody. Now, I will describe the image that comes to me when I sing (*cough*) I mean, read this piece.
Represents that time is present, however not stating how much time is passing. This leaves it up to the reader to interpret it as they see fit. I see it as a general description of time, as in, a very long lapse in time.
Everyone dies, no matter what road they choose to encompass. Saints and warriors have very different morals or goals and yet, each one becomes one with the earth, becoming part of the past.
Becomes first person point of view, allowing the readers to realize that this is realistic and takes place on a personal level. To me, this says that just by living and being here, people are a miracle because they are a living being. However, being only two, not in a literal sense, is that there can only be so much done. I believe this is making reference to the first stanza about being forgotten, becoming part of the past no matter how hard one may try.
However, human's must learn to accept that they are never alone because everyone dies and is eventually forgotten to some extent. It is a hard truth but a truth at that.
Realize and live for today, forget about the past or the future.
Now, I know this is absolutely not what you meant when you wrote this but my mind always interprets things much differently. Beautiful piece anyways.
Much love,
Saye
Thanks. It's an incomplete verse; I was hoping to get help with it.
This was very good! I enjoyed reading it. It flowed nicely and your rhythm was wonderful!
Keep up the good work and keep writing! You are are very good!
Dawning light, setting sun-
Saints and warriors, one by one
Fade into the past
Leaving shadows cold as stone.
We are only two-
Working miracles, me and you.
Soldiers of the truth
In this life we%u2019re never alone Loved this stanza
Step into today,
All impurities burn away.
This one was my favorite but...the other ones have four maybe this one should too? Its up to you just thought it might look better
~KJR~