The exact same flicker light thing just happened at my school about fifteen minutes ago!
z
Author's note: This was based on a conversation I had with my friend. I decided to make a story out of it, using a few techniques from the story, "Annie95 is typing". And don't worry, nothing bad happened in the end. Everything was a bit strange, but I saw her the next day and she was fine. Some information you need to know in order to understand what is happening: We are talking about periods 4 and 5. The 'test" that is mentioned is a test we took in 4th period science. In 5th period, she has history, I have english. Mrs. Le is the name of our science teacher. Ms. Ly is her history teacher and Ms. Sentner is my english teacher. "Mr. Melly" is Ms. Sentner's teacher helper. His name is spelled incorrectly though. The "glitching screen" mentioned by my friend is the screen glitch from Annie95 is typing. The "stalker book" is a book the school gave all the student at the beginning of the year that included everyone's addresses, phone number, and email. It includes the teacher's classroom phone extensions. Hope that clears up some of the confusion!
audio recording of a video chat *some parts may be unintelligible due to static, will be marked with a ****
omg i need to tell u a story, so during 5th period, we were working on h
*hw
So, the light above Sentner started blinking, it blinked once
then twice, a total of 3 times, then it stopped blinking
someone said whoa, then it started blinking like crazy
it was like a strobe light, then someone screamde
*screamed
then there was this creepy metallic sound
omg i heard someone scream in 5 th too
then Mr Melly turned off the light
Omg anddd
did u see? 😮
no
but i heard the scream
:OOOOOOO
and i was the only one who heard it, so i am like wat
but no one else noticed it, i dont know what dat was ;-;
so i am all like maybe it is in my head
but it is too much of a coiincidnece
but it wasnt...
but who screamed
for us to be talkin about it yesterday and for it to happen today
i dont know
omg omg omg omg
it is after us
oh nooo
the glitching screen
the light
wat is itt
the scream, this smell of trouble
and creepy supernatural stuff
hey did Sentner tell u honor stuff
yea
im like
im definitally not gonna get it
but who screamed?!
i dont knowwwwwww
yy
dat is the creepy part
it didnt sound like a human scream
waaaaaaaaaat
it echoed
i could barely hear it
human screams dont echo in classrooms
****
but i know i heard it
creepy
wat did the class do
after the scream there was this ringing in my head
they kept writing
waat
wierdos
i d be like AAAHHHHHHh
and run into the vent system and scream thro it
hey during the test
ya?****
did u hear this wierd sound
it wnet beeep every few seconds
and id look around the classroom
no 😮
but i couldnt find the source
and no one else reacted to itttt
and i am like wth
it was really bothering me
oh no, its comiung
but it was like
oomg
u heard it right, in science?
u had too
no...only english
but i think the scream heard in history was in my head
it didnt seem like something
i dont know
Wait this is weird so in science u heard it i didnt
in english i did udidnt
dat was periods 4 and 5
45
*****Â
40 is the meaing of life
omgggggggggggg
maybe it is telling us something
the 45 th day of the year
Omg maybe its telling us to go beyond life
into death...
or 4+5
i dont knowwww
4 stand for death in chinese
*****Â
wat about 5
i dont know but i thought of something
5+4 is 9, 4 means death
49 means "dead for a long time"
maybe the real number is 49
i dont know]
and i dont get 4
Wait a sec
yes?
wat if the noise i heard
was in4
In 4th period!!!
and was telling me that #4 would behard
ohhh
so i can now tell the future..
so many 4s but 4 means death
it means much death which means
death creator
during 4th or 5th period
...
I HAVE A THEORY
during 4th p or 5th p
a death creator who was thought to be dead for a long time ******
will go beyond death, into life
and carry death with him
lots of death
and who ever hears his scream will be the first victims
OMG
but it was beep sound
whoever hears his sound them
OMG
WHAT IF IT MEANS HOW THEY WILL DIE
calm means a quick death
scream means a slow and agonizing one..
im scared ;-;
1 cuz of de scream 2 because im not done with hw
maybe it something else
omg
Ms Le room is 401
OH
and Ms Sentner 405
OHHHHHH
.......................\
4+0+5=9
4+1+0=5
this still makes sense
wait no
Ly is 301
OMG
3+0+1=4
O
M
G
OOOOOOOOMMMMMMGGGGGGG
*****************
4+0+5=9999999999999999
i am out done kapeesh it all goes back to 9
wat does 9 mean
LONG
it symbolizes long in chinese
Tina keep on thinking
buti found something else
brb i will turn to my private investigator for more
yes?
in the stalker book there is a # for each teacher
for Le it is6739, Sentner it is 6708
ohh yes
it all add up to 45!!!!!!! i am not even kidding
wut
this isnt a mere coinsedecne Tina
this the universe
telling us something
no its 46
Oh wao
but wait 3 teachers
Le, Ly, and Senter
46+3=49
THIS CASE IS TOO CREEPY
TINA
THERE IS M-MORE
we r born in September
whaaaaaat
9!!!!!!!!!
OMG
the 9th month
OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOGMOGM
yup
OH EM GE
this is too much'
too much to be a mere coicidence
TINAAAAAAAAa ur full name has 9 LETTERS
i am so scared
all the letters in my name equal to
9
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
Tina there is more
both of our last names r 4 and 5
me being 4 and u being 5
and add up to be 9
oh no
this is too much
what is dat bangin noise
idkkkk creeeppyyyy omg maybe my sis?
omg
I have another one
Sentner=6
Le=2
6+2=
oh wait nvm
Sentner has 7!!!!!!!
not 6
OMGGGGGGGGg
its 9!!!!!!!!
Holy i hear footstps behind you
**** there is *** behind you*****
**********
**********************
**********
No, what xD You need some sleep.
There is no one behind me.
We’ll, I’m pretty sure all of this is just coincidences.
Nothing else.
no i swear there was someone behind you
4 minutes later
mushroom u there?
9 minutes later
mushrrooommm??
was that you previously?
how do I know if that was you?
***** holy god fuc-****ng***
*screams
***********************************************
The exact same flicker light thing just happened at my school about fifteen minutes ago!
WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOOWOWOW
THIS IS A SCARY STORY THAT ACTUALLY SCARED ME.
DO YOU KNOW HOW RARE THIS IS?
STEPHEN FLIPPING KING DOESN'T SCARE ME.
HORROR MOVIES DON'T SCARE ME.
BUT THIS DID!
(Plus I love how you used Annie96 is typing. I love that story and the movie)
I just have one piece of criticism: Isn't it 42 that is the meaning of life? Not 40? (If you nerds don't get it it's a reference from A Hitchhiker's Guide of the Galaxy)
Dude we should do an Annie96 co-author thing together or something. I posted one thing of horror and that's it. (Check it out!) I think I'm pretty scary, but you're scarier. WAY scarier.
Keep up the good work!--
Kara
I think the overall arching concept of the story is really great. The fact that this is based off of a true story is actually pretty terrifying, and I'm going to be looking over my shoulder for a while. Although I can't figure out if this is over text or not because if it is over text I don't understand how some of the texts wouldn't be legible, but if they are talking then the grammar is very off. If I were you, I would take this and make it into story form, along with what happened during the periods. Maybe take it out of them just texting or whatever and add some background into it? I feel like that would make the story that much scareier. Also, I think you should put in character names and make this in to a real story. Still, like I said before, it is very good and actually creates a semi severe form of fear in me that I probably shouldn't have but this isn't even completely fictional. Good job and I hoped this helped
Hey there! I thought I'd drop by to review this.
So this is a cool way to do a story, instant messaging back and forth. I think it works pretty well - the story is certainly engaging and creepy at the end.
There are a few things I think you could do to make it a stronger story, though.
First, ditch a lot of the chatspeak, or at least the misspellings of words (like 'wat') and all but the most commonly used acronyms. (brb, nvm, etc.) Also, capitalize names - there were a few times where I thought you were referring to a name but wasn't sure if it was that or if it was just a misspelled word. This is just to make it more readable. Chatspeak is faster to type, which is why people use it, but it actually slows down reading a lot more than you'd think, even for people more used to it. I had to backtrack a few times to understand what was being said.
The reader should be able to read the story without needing the paragraph of explanation at the top. That's just good storytelling. This will mean editing it to be less like the actual transcript of your conversation, but that just goes to show that real life is not like fiction. In general, I think you'd be surprised at how much readers can pick up without you overtly explaining.
You frequently used asterisks and I didn't quite understand why - some of them looked like they were censoring out swear words, but then others were just random strings of asterisks. Did they symbolize time passing?
But overall, I enjoyed this. The absurdity of the math and how everything added up to 49 and the general air of conspiracy theory made me laugh, and then it was very chilling when it turned out that it was all true... and something happened.
Hey there! I was a bit skeptical to review this at first because I wasn't sure how. I've never read anything quite like this.
I have a few thoughts/a bit more confusions:
1) The text-speak was, it felt, a little unnecessary. Since this was written from an audio, I think simply writing it it "regular" writing would be better and easier to read. It would make more sense if it was a text message, but it wasn't, so it really isn't necessary.
2) I love the story that we get to follow, but it really was too confusing. If I hadn't read the author's note I wouldn't really have known what was going on. And it's hard because since this was a conversation, you can't exactly alter it to make it "less" confusing, but maybe you can find a way? Even developing this further into a story - maybe creating a character that narrates in first person, so we get the information that we do need (like the stalker book and the teachers).
3) I think my favorite part about this was the plot. I was a bit "hmm... it's just gonna be some simple text message story" but boy was I wrong! The entire thing was fun, thrilling, and exciting. I liked it a lot.
What I think would be cool - and this is a crazy idea - if you take these two characters (you/your friend) and you could make small stories like these with them in it, maybe revolving around mystery! Sort of a mini Nancy Drew type of thing.
Was all this real or did you evolve a conversation you had with your friend into this story? :p It was crazy! If it was real, I'm glad you two are okay.
Keep writing!
~EternalRain
Points: 125
Reviews: 61
Donate