The flight

Hi there!

I'm here to review, as requested.

I'll start out by saying this is short. Chapters don't have to be a certain length, but their usually longer, that's why I mentioned that. Your descriptions are good. You give just enough information to keep the reader clued in. My English professor always told us that authors didn't add anything that wasn't important. Sometimes less is more.

Comments/Suggestions/Critiques:
"'Sorry!' I shout as I point to my headphones, 'I can't hear you! I'm listening to my phone!'"
~two things:
1) when you're writing dialogue in which your character is yelling, you don't have to put exclamation points after each sentence. Simply saying that he/she is shouting is good enough.
2) I think you should say 'I'm listening to music'. It sounds better than saying he/she is listening to their phone

~Brad should be capitalized

Overall I would give this a 4/6. It lacks description and background. Who is this person? Why are they traveling to New York from Los Angelos? Did they really expect to have someone famous sitting next to them on the plane ride? How old are they? What do they do for a living?

These are some questions I have about this. Maybe these will be answered in later chapters.

Let me know when you add another chapter. Keep writing!
**Noelle**

Well, I never been on a plane but I have seen this moment expressed in a bunch of movies and writings, its kind-of the go-to when people are writing an airplane scene. So the originality is lacking here, I mean I know this character and this anger and this situation altogether. There's no message you are sending to the reader or anything. Its written well, but its not very captivating to read. I wouldn't say that this is not a short story it just doesn't feel like one. It feels more like a prompt 'write how you feel on an airplane' and if it is then disregard this.

Thanks for choosing me as your critic

Note: Ignore the weird names, they're just names I put in before I put in real ones that I think of.