We choose the easy way out,
The way that is most comfortable,
The way that fights change, and keeps us safe.
Sometimes change is needed though.
Occasionally we make the right choices,
Most of the time we do not.
We are human,
nothing more, Nothing less.
We are brilliant, Yet blind,
Blind to the good the world presents us with.
We must strive to see the good and not the bad.
But it is difficult.
This is a moment when we must walk the hard path.
No matter the ricks that lie in our way.
We are like rivers, that run down the side of a mountain.
We cannot stay still, We cannot stay in the same place forever.
Things will get in our way,
Always.
But no matter what happens,
Accept change, You will have to go through it no matter what.
Blissfully, or ignorant.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I wrote this off the top of my head a couple years ago, I figured I'd post it to see if it was worth trying to get published.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,005 Literary Works • 672,800 Reviews
I really like this, I mean it's simple enough to understand but it really sounds intellectual, I think I'm gonna read some of your other poems (if they are hwre) I'm not online a lot but I'd lIke you to check out some of my stuff tell me what you think, it looks like we have similar styles
This is filled with some great imagery, but mostly I like the rhythm and how you didn't shy from using strong fitting rhymes that make the poem pound like a hot hammer on an anvil. It gets in your soul. You took the words and created just the right mood and tempo. The detail given was nothing less than exquisite. Thank you for sharing and keep on writing.
Hello there Kat here to review!
So what is a rick , just wondering...
Really great it seems like a popular theme for poets lately is portraying the flaws in humanity and adding a twist to it...then again when isn't that a popular topic. I think that if you broke this up into stanzas it would be easier to read. Also, I think it reads better if you take out the always at the end but that may just be me. Nice use of literary devices also ....brilliant <3
That's just my two cents
Kat
Haha, I meant rock, sorry.
Hello, Tay 01 here to review your poetry. Yes, I liked it and it was worth publishing it because, you have got a review from me now. I really understood its deep meaning, also very strong too. Far and wide imagination you have to write this. Anyway, let's not sit here and blabber about, let's jump to the point of reviewing, shall we?
First of all,
It would sound better if it went like this:
"Sometomes changes are needed tough."
We make it plural because you are referring to the changes we make, not a change that you have specifically in mind.
Next:
"Accept change"
It would be better if you go,
""Accept the changes you make, you will have to go through it no matter what.""
Blind to the good the world presents us with?
How about this?
""Blinded to the good is what we are gifted by the world.""
But, overall, I think it is pretty good. You just had a little slips, and I hope I have managed to cover all of them up just now.
~~Tay01
Thanks for the feedback!
The 'sometomes' should be sometimes. Sorry typing error
Yea I noticed a bunch of those after I published it. lol