When dreams become reality
And fantasies become boring
dreams
Well, it’s the order of the
second rising sky
You find yourself looking at
moving scenes
With dancing foxes and
screaming Swedes
All you’re doing is hiding
from the skies
When you’re walking amongst the zombie sheep
Wasting time and looking chic
They’ll just fall, right towards
the flashing skies
Flashing pixels, right before
our eyes
It’s flashing pixels, so
close before our eyes
You can feel the robotic mechanical
powers
They’re made from bigger and
more-higher powers
Psychotronic worms are
cleaning through ours brains
Smiles and humor hide the
truth of inner pain
Passively living life as it
comes and goes
But the premonition takes you
and I so vary far away
I wish we didn’t go so far
away
We have the questions, and
the sky has the answers
It says look at the flashing
pixels, falling from the skies
Bright flashing pixels, so
close before your eyes
Black and white creatures roam
around in the night
Making fogy figures appearing
before our sights
Close your eyes, and count to
ten
Hoping and praying that it’s all pretend
But inner pain and intuition
is just too much comprehend
So make it all come to a halting
end
What were we before the
rising sky
Before they took away our
third eye
With their flashing pixels
put before our eyes
It’s flashing pixels, so
close before our eyes
May flashing pixels, slowly close my eyes.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
140,223 Literary Works • 673,046 Reviews
This is one of the best lyrics that I've ever read in my whole life! I think I understand all the meanings mean, such as screaming Swedes means Pewdiepie on Youtube, and dancing foxes means that stupid song also on Youtube called What Does The Fox Say.
The rising skies mean the new order of the world.
The grammar is okay, I could of changed a few things but I say it's all around good!
This song is really all about a persons first view of the corruption of the world and how we've been dumbed down with society and social medias, and the person has been under attack physically by an unknown force because of his knowledge of the unknown.
It's a deep understanding but it's interesting when you understand it all.
Great work Sounds! Hope to hear more form you!
Can someone please make this a thing?
OK first off, I just LOVE this and hope this will be made a thing. Something that also brought me to this was the word "Pixels". I don't have any nitpicks, at all. And I wouldn't change a single thing not one! I think my favorite lines are the very last ones. I hope to see more lyrics or other things from you soon!
P.S: YOU HAVE EARNED A FOLLOWER!!!
Well thank you so vary much! =D
Omg i love this song first of all and personally I think you should sing it on youtube if you are a singer and or you should get someone to sing it for you but personally I think this is really good
and yes you did have a few mistakes and this is not to long it's the perfect song for you that you have written or is it a poem? Now you have a lot of the same word like eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes how come you are writing or typing a lot of those and is fogy a word or did you mean foggy. Oh never mind my mistake I looked it up but you have a lot of very big words in here which I enjoy very much which tells me you are very big on your vocabulary."When dreams become reality
And fantasies become boring dreams
Well, it’s the order of the second rising sky" Now that part what did you exactly mean when you said that it's the order of the second rising sky, I think it is very deep that you put that but I would like to know why "What were we before the rising sky
Before they took away our third eye
With their flashing pixels put before our eyes
It’s flashing pixels, so close before our eyes
May flashing pixels, slowly close my eyes." and also that part that was the part i was talking about with the eyes it's very funny to me but I don't know why
This song lyrics is reviling the corruption of the mainstream media and how they can dissolve the vary thing that we call "Being human" Our eyes is what connects us to reality, and what we see can be for good or bad. We can be programed by the things we see, like hence the reason why they call TV shows "Programs" and the imagery that we see everyday does effect how we are and our actions, that's the reason why I used the word eyes in this so much, and it goes a lot deeper than that but I would be here all day trying to explain it all.
"Well, it%u2019s the order of the second rising sky" That means the New World Order, that's in a nutshell.
Foggy is a word I did miss, I meant to use foggy instead of fogy.
Thank you so much for reviewing my work! Great review you made here! =D
thanks
I really thought it was amazing. You have a couple of grammar mistakes. In my opinion I thought it had to many lines. I also thought that you could have made it just a little bit more interesting. Other then that I thought it was awesome.
Hello there!
Could you point out the grammar mistakes that you've noticed? It's not that I'm offended in anyway I just want to know what they are so that I can learn from my mistakes.
I'm glad that you found this to be awesome, thanks for the complement!
Hey there,
Retro here for a review. I will do a few nitpicks then talk about what I liked, okay?
Okay, for a poem this length and you keep the same length stanza throughout, you should probably try to keep it throughout the poem. (unless the last few stanzas were done intentionally to break away from the idea of non-conformity)
the other thing, you use the same words throughout. Like 'Power', i mean it works, i guess...but I feel as though it might become more powerful with more varied vocabulary.
I guess that's, I mean there's nothing bad here. and i love the idea, but i think you could make it pop a bit more. Maybe a bit more aggression in your tone?
But, what i liked is more to say. I love the idea of the second sky. I love the message here, and i think for the most part it is very well done. You have some nice imagery, especially concerning pixels. This really isn't a bad attempt at all!!!
With a little more work, i think you could be onto a winner here.
Best of luck,
Retro
Hey Retro!
I can totally understand why you pointed out that there's like a lack of vocabulary varied in this piece of lyrical work, it's because when I was creating this it wasn't to be taken so much as poetry, but to be taken as musical lyrics. As I writing this I had a beat going through my head, and it all matched with the lyrics fairly well. I guess I should've pointed that out somewhere before posting this, and I guess I shouldn't of put this under a poetry category, that's why the stanzas aren't really consistent, but at the time it made sense to do so. I'm so glad that you pointed out the flaws that you've noticed so don't get me wrong.
"the other thing, you use the same words throughout. Like 'Power', i mean it works, i guess...but I feel as though it might become more powerful with more varied vocabulary."
I totally 100% agree with what you said, it needed other words to help bring out the point of the whole thing better, and also make it "pop" a bit more as well.
I agree with you again, this does need a little more work, I can see that now with fresh eyes looking at it this morning. I created Flashing Pixels last night, and it took me about an hour to type it all up, and I should of waited till morning to upload this, I probably would of noticed more things that needed to be fixed if i did.
Thank you so much for this awesome review Retro! I really do appreciate it!
Best of luck to you too!