They say he comes in the blackest of night
a chilling "Cluck!"
a thrilling fright
down from the heavens in final flight.
They say he's tall, a daunting height,
a feathery beast
a menacing sight,
a farmer's karmic kryptonite.
They say he's hot, a burning fiend,
with breath of flame,
a war machine,
with feet like swords, to split you clean.
Well, I haven't spotted this brute obscene,
and truth be told,
I'm not too keen
on trusting tales of cockatrice spleen.
It's nothing, that much is clear-
Now, what's this?
A peck at the door I hear-
"Oh god!" I shout and shed a tear.
It's him, it's him, my greatest fear!
the fowl tale is true,
now through the window, an avian sneer
I see him coming, my death is ne-
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Oh wow,this was hilarious! Is this literally about a killer chicken or is it just about how annoying chickens are? Because if this is about a Halloween slasher chicken,I’m not complaining.To be honest,it’d be a funny and creative twist if this were a horror movie.I can see it now:”Terror comes in clucks.” Well,I hope that you have an amazing and lovely day and night.
Lol! Yeah, this about an eldritch killer chicken. And thank you!!
Hello! I'm not the best at analysing poetry so I'll just say I really enjoyed this! It was very funny and had a great rhythm to it.
'They say he's hot' - at first I did think you meant sexy. I was like, well, there's someone for everyone I guess XD I've heard of far too many sorts of... romances out there.
The ending is great! I could totally picture this as like a black and white silent movie and then the end screen is black with *disturbing chicken sounds then silence*
Great writing!
Hey there! Plume here, with a review!
Firstly, I just want to make clear how much I absolutely adore this poem. If I'm being honest, it reminds me a lot of the Raven by Edgar Allan Poe— it's a poem about a creepy bird and has a great rhyme scheme. Enough said. I think it has a lot of great humor in it as well— that last line is just *perfect.* Really great job on this one!!
I think the one thing that really stood out to me was your rhyme scheme. I loved it so much. It was super effective to have stanzas with a whole bunch of the same rhyme— it gave it a super frantic feel, which, when culminating in that ending, worked really nicely. There were a couple lines (like "Well, I haven't spotted this brute obscene," "It's nothing, that much is clear," and "A peck at the door I hear-") where the syllable count felt a little off and trying to read these lines with the same cadence as the others threw me off a bit and disrupted the flow. I know rhyming poems can be hard, especially since the English language is really weird about stressed and unstressed syllables, but I'd just recommend reading the poem aloud or in your head to see if it flows smoothly. But yes, I think the rhyme scheme was one of the parts of this poem that makes it so fun to read.
Specifics
This is by far my favorite line. It fits in so well with the lines around it and also it RHYMES which makes it even more satisfying, but even within you've got such wonderful sound devices. The assonance in "farmer" and "karmic" is absolutely delightful, and then the alliteration of "karmic" and "kryptonite" is simply so fantastic. The flow of the syllables works super nicely too. Just everything about it is perfect. I love it.
Love the play-on-words/pun here.
I'm pretty sure the phrase "an avian sneer" is forever memorialized in my brain. I just— I'm losing my mind trying to picture a smug chicken, and the way you phrased it is so funny.
Also, just a helpful tip— if you want to put white space you can either put five or more spaces on the line you want white space on, or you can press shift+enter on lines in the same stanza and then press enter normally on lines where you want white space! The formatting on this site isn't the most user friendly, so it can kind of be hard to figure out that sort of stuff, but I hope this helps!
Overall: nice work!! I think both the subject matter and the rhyming scheme really make this poem into something special. It was such a pleasure to read, and I look forward to reading more of your poetry soon! Until next time!!
Thanks so much for the review!!! I'll definitely work on the feeling of the poem. And that's actually my favorite line too! it rolls off the tongue so nicely. Also puns are life, and i always try to include at least one : )
I'm glad you liked it! And thanks for the tips, i'll try em out!
Ah it won't let me put spaces