Published October 15, 2011
The runes of old.
Stopping time and
Speaking futures.
Intricate complexity
Bound in symbols
Of cryptic powers.
Tied within the
Ancient families,
The talen bears
A devastating past.
The pure ladies
So rare shall rule
But cursed to live
On their darkest sin.
The protectors of pure
Forced to bear their mark,
In the cycle of the pure's
Bloodstained kindness.
Cursed to live for eternity
The Ancients face the challenge
Of losing all those they hold dear.
In the shadows of war
Where nothing is absolute.
A bloody past inscribed upon
These child of old.
My they learn to move on from
Their sinister childhood,
Or wilt like a deadened flower.
In the runes bloodstained kindness.
Those that achieve
The ability to forgive
Shall become the
Summoners of Old.
Bringing forth the past
And with them
A chance of happiness
Within their darkness,
The bloodstained kindness
That their Queen bears
As a cruel reminder
Of their descent.
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141,397 Literary Works • 674,387 Reviews
A great story told! Now, the poem itself I shall perhaps be crueler towards.
While the pacing kept everything nice and tight, I was disconcerted by the extremely short lines. There is nothing wrong with the general idea of such line length, but one must be careful: enjambed lines sound awkward if ending with prepositions or conjunctions (as in your second line).
That said, the rest of it is great, and I particularly loved the recursive callback of the last stanza. As an above reviewer said, perhaps that should be an aspect of the poem's title. =]
Wow this was amazing!! I'm not the best poet, but even I know that this is great stuff! I can't wait to read more from you, keep writing
Hello there!!!
First off, I love the feeling of this poem. It's almost the feeling I get when I'm reading a book that was written a long time ago, like the Three Musketeers or Jane Eyre. I love that you were able to capture it within the lines of your poem.
This is probably my favorite part of the poem. It also contains what's going to be my suggestion for the title of this poem: "Summoners of the Old". Just a suggestion.
I really can't find much wrong with this poem. Always keep writing!!!
-Rose