My footsteps echoed off the marble
floor as I made my way through the care facility. I glanced at my watch, which
also displayed the date. Twelfth of October, the year two-thousand-one-hundred
and sixteen. It was my twentieth birthday, but I had no chance of getting the
day off. I was due in class in about two hours. I thought about the dark
lecture hall, then looked out the window at the flawless day waiting outside
and my heart sank. What a waste of such a gorgeous day. First on my list of
many errands, though, was visit my grandmother. I reached the front desk and smiled politely
at the girl in the nurse’s uniform.
“Addison
Montgomery. Here to see Commander Rose Montgomery. I’m her granddaughter,” I
said, flashing my Identification Card.
She looked something up on the
computer, then nodded in approval.
“Have a seat. The doctor will be out
to speak with you shortly.”
After
a plane crash took my parents when I was seven, my grandmother was pretty much
all I had left. She retired from the navy and stepped up to raise me on her
own. I felt awful that I hadn’t visited much in the last year, but college had
taken so much of my time. I was thinking I should make more of an effort to
come by on the weekends when a doctor came into the waiting area. She was young
and tall with long, red hair and she was donning a white lab coat.
“Are you the next of kin for,” she
glanced at a clipboard, “Rose Montgomery?”
“Yes.”
“Well,
I’m sure you already know your grandmother is unresponsive to the longevity
pills.”
There
was a time, long ago, when people would succumb to illnesses and disease, even
at young ages. Then the Longevity Pill was created. People could take this pill
once a day and it would keep them young and healthy for decades. It doesn’t
work on everyone, though. In rare cases, the patient is “unresponsive” to the
pill. These poor souls are doomed to a life of aging as nature intended, like
they did in the old days.
“Yes,
I know.” I replied.
“Usually,
patients who are unresponsive don’t have any immediate threats to their health,
so they still have some time left,” the doctor explained. “In your
grandmother’s case, however, I’m afraid there is an immediate issue. It’s
called cancer.”
I
remembered learning about the disease in history lessons at school.
“You
mean like people used to get in the old days?”
“Yes.
It’s very a very aggressive one that has spread through her blood cells. This
is the reason we called you. I’m afraid we’ve caught it in its late stages.”
Suddenly,
it was like all the warmth had been sucked out of the room.
“Are
you saying she’s dying?”
The
doctor looked at me with sullen eyes. “She has a few months, at most.”
I
swallowed through the lump in my throat.
“There’s
something else,” she added. “I’m sure you probably already know this, but I
would be remiss if I didn’t bring it up. Unresponsiveness to the longevity
pills is genetic. One-hundred percent inheritance rate. Do you understand what
that means?”
I
did. The pills wouldn’t work on me, either.
“Yes,”
I replied.
“Do
you have any questions?”
“Yes.
Can I see her?”
She
nodded. “Follow me.”
I
followed the doctor through a brightly lit hallway until we reached room 212. I
walked in and saw a small, feeble figure laying on the bed, wrapped in a wool
blanket.
“Grandma?”
I asked. She didn’t answer.
“She
may have some trouble hearing you,” the doctor said.
I
approached the bed and spoke louder.
“Grandma?”
When
she turned and faced me, I almost didn’t recognize her. It was like she had
aged ten years in one. The distinctive green color of her eyes, however,
confirmed that it was her.
“Addie,”
she said weakly.
“How
are you feeling?” it was all I could think to ask.
“I
feel about as good as I look,” she replied.
The
doctor and I chuckled at that.
“I’ll
leave you two alone,” the doctor said softly, closing the door.
I
dragged a chair over to the bed and sat.
“What
are you doing here?” my grandmother asked.
“I
wanted to see how you were, that’s all. Has the facility been taking good care
of you?”
“Oh,
yes,” she replied, bitterly. “I’m getting waited on hand and foot.”
I
smiled. This was somebody so independent, she used to scoff if somebody so much
as held a door open for her. Do I look so delicate that I can’t lift a
thin, wooden door?
“That
must drive you nuts,” I said.
“There’s
nothing to do here, Addie.”
“It
can’t be that bad. On my way in, I saw a game room full of stuff to do. They
have TV’s and computers-”
“That’s
what I’m supposed to do with my time now? Play games? Do you know how much I
used to get done in a day?”
“That
was then,” I said. “But this is now. You’ve done your duty for your country.
Now, you get to relax. I know it’s hard-”
“No,
you don’t,” she said, sharply. “You don’t know. But someday, you will.”
She
turned on her side and face me, looking me dead in the eyes.
“Did
they tell you the pills won’t work on you either?”
I
nodded.
“I
would do anything, Addie, anything, to keep you from laying in this
bed one day. Slowly losing what makes you you. I wouldn’t wish
that on my worst enemy.”
“That’s
not true. You’re still you.”
“Am
I? Laying here all the time, needing everybody’s help for every little thing.
Watching each day pass me by, one after the other after the other. Is that me
now? If it is, I wish I would have died on the frontlines when I was your age.”
I
shook my head, about to object but she cut me off.
“Don’t
tell me not to talk like that, it’s the truth. Those who die young are lucky.
They don’t have to watch themselves wither away.”
“But-”
“But,
nothing,” she snapped. “That’s what I’m doing, Addie. I’m withering away. I’m
disappearing. In this new era where people are living well into their hundreds
I’m dying at sixty-five. It isn’t fair and it doesn’t make sense, but it’s
happening. And all I keep thinking is, what am I leaving behind after I go? And
you know what the answer is?”
She
reached over and put an icy hand on my cheek.
“It’s
you,” she said. “You are what I’m leaving behind. You’re my legacy.”
She
took her hand back and faced the wall again. Suddenly, the door opened. A nurse
came in.
“Rose,
would you like to sit in the quad for a while?” she asked, her cheerful tone
cutting through the tension in the room. “It’s a gorgeous say outside.”
Suddenly, she looked at me, concerned. “Sweetheart, are you alright?”
I
didn’t understand why she was worried, until I caught sight of my reflection in
a mirror hanging on the wall. Tears were streaming down my cheeks. I didn’t
realize I had been crying.
“I’m
fine,” I replied, mopping my face with my sleeve. My voice came out more
strangled than I meant it to.
“I’m
too tired to go outside right now,” my grandmother said. “Check back later,
please.”
The
nurse nodded before turning back and shutting the door behind her.
For
as long as I could remember, my grandmother had been like a rock. Unshakable
and strong. But that wasn’t her anymore. Now, it sounded like she was giving
up.
“You’ve
changed,” I told her.
“No,
I haven’t,” she replied. “I’ve just stopped caring enough to lie, that’s all.
That’ll happen to you, too. When you get older.”
Then
it hit me. As I looked at her laying there, grey and bone-thin, I realized I
was looking at my future.
“Addie,
if you learn anything from me, I want it to be this,” she said, suddenly.
“Hours turn into days, days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months and months
turn into years faster than you will ever fathom. Every single second is a
gift. Figure out what you want to do and do it, because the clock runs out on
everyone and it’s going to run out even faster for us.”
…
I
wish I would have died on the frontlines when I was your age.
As
I walked out of the care center, I couldn’t get what my grandmother said out of
my head. I had known, of course, that one day I would die. Death is an
inevitability for everyone. But now I had stared my future in the face. Slowly
losing what makes you you. Nothing could be worse than that. That
wasn’t the only thing ailing me, either. I had always thought I had decades
ahead of me, but what if I was wrong? There was no magic pill that could keep
me healthy for decades to come. I could wake up tomorrow morning and find a
lump in the back of my neck. What then? Suddenly, I felt dizzy. The hallway I
was walking down began to spin.
When
I had woken up that morning, I was looking towards the future with excitement.
I found the idea of not knowing what the next twenty years held to be
thrilling. Now, not knowing what the future held made me sick to my stomach
with fear. The future was no longer a bright, vast horizon. Now, it was dark
and filled with monsters hiding in every corner, just waiting to take me out.
The
overwhelming feeling of dread stopped me in my tracks. I realized then that I
had been circling the same floor of the care center over and over again. It was
eighty degrees outside, but my arms were covered in goosebumps and I was
shivering. My eyes fell onto a sign on the wall, hanging above a door. ROOFTOP
ENTRANCE. I glanced quickly to my left, then to my right, just to make sure I
wasn’t being watched by any doctors or nurses. When I confirmed the coast was
clear, I sprinted through the automatic door.
I
climbed the numerous flights of stairs until I reached the roof. It was
deserted, apart from a flock of birds perched on the perimeter of the rooftop.
I walked out towards the edge and looked down. Cars were speeding down the
expressway below me. It would be so easy, I thought to myself. All I would have
to do is jump, and there would be no more worrying about how I would die or
when. I could go now, on my own terms. I wish I would have died on the
frontlines when I was your age.
I
put one foot on the ledge, then the other, glancing upwards for one final look
at the sky. Shutting my eyes, I took one last breath and filled my lungs to
full capacity. I wish I would have died on the frontlines when I was
your age. I clenched my fists, and jumped.
Points: 375
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