Young Writers Society

Hello there and welcome to YWS. This is loveissourgrapes and I am here to review/comment on your poetry. This sounds very nice, and the way it's writing is different. But I do like the writing style. It's like a story too.

Darkness wanes, yeilding to the day's embrace. Light's tender touch, an intricate lace, yet remenants of yesteryears linger near. In the corners of the heart, they appear

A request murmers through the night's grace."Stay lets share, a moment face to face". Familiar faces draw me in, a tapestry's spun connections woven, under the same sun

But a, celestial beacon, beckons me afar. Guiding ,me beyond, a distant star. Fumes of bygone days start to recede, as the star's brilliance becomes my creed

Hello! There are a few small grammatical errors here that could be corrected, unless done for stylistic reasons, in which case feel free to ignore me.
"Familiar faces", with no apostrophe. "A tapestry spun connections woven:, is an amazing piece of visual writing but I feel there should perhaps be a comma after spun, otherwise it doesn't quite make sense to me but it does sound amazing altogether in the sense of "à tapestry's spun connections woven" which could also have been your aim. Then you just have a comma rather than an M further word me in the 3rd standard, easy fix. Where you say "like a distant star" you could leave out "like a", and just "guiding me beyond, à distant star". Also the final star's should have an apostrophe to show it's possession.

That being said I love the sense of fumes in regards to past mémoires, as smell is our strongest sense tied to memory, and the word fume is so évolutive of something overpowering, even à bit negative. Taken as a whole I love how you start the poem with the down, yet still allude to the stars afterwards. It feels so magical and peaceful, yet evocative. Like waking slowly from à dream and then jumping out of bed with vigor. I love the imager you use and thank you for this work.