Just a Spark

Hello CapitalMonday here, reviewing from the nest. I would like to start out by saying that poem is motivational to anyone who needs to do anything and how you can make a change in the most oddest ways. I like how you repeat "just a spark, will make our make!" in bold since I believe you are making a point. Also how the tone of this is like get off that couch and do something worth doing, not watching TV but making the changes in the world no one else will do. You can be that person that makes something new; all you need is a spark and everything is set in place.

Change can come from many people or just one person. They can make something that people could use for science or for their mobile devices and win millions of dollars. I wanted to make change and I did once and it changed my world and everyone else in my family since I could do anything I want like this poem states.

All you need to do is anything to make a spark then that spark turns into a fire. Those coices you make will be your guideline.

Sorry if this "review" doesn't make sense,
CapitalMonday

its a very encouraging poem, it puts me in thoughts like "have i not done anything for this world"...it gave me the will to get up and do something worthy for the nation.
i just couldn't stop reading it, very catchy and brilliant.

This is incredible it flows together and gives off that ( i know im saying this wrong) that rebellious spark that makes you want to change the world right now. Your wording and imagery were brilliant to say the least and i can't stop re-reading this well done

This is very inspirational as poems goes. It's something that gets your blood pumping and wanting to take action in the world. That's basically what I felt like when I read this, it was gripping and filling me with the urge to do something. I could imagine this as like a chant or a chorus of a song. Very well done I would say! Keep on writing.

Hello, @SilverKnight007! I am @emeraldfox, representing the Night Furies this review day!

Nice job on this! I thought it was very well thought-out and you clearly took your time on it. I liked the message a lot. If we all just tried to bring about change, there would be much more equality and social justice in the world! The rhymes that you used were very good and didn't seem forced or stretched. I also liked the repetition of the phrase "Just a spark". Your poem had a good meter and it flowed well. You didn't have any spelling, grammar, or punctuation errors.

I do have a few improvements to suggest. You had some very strong word choice and vocabulary, but sometimes they can be a bit much, especially in poetry. Some of your lines were a bit of a mouthful, such as the sixth, tenth, eighteenth, and twenty-second lines. Just simplify them a little and clean them up. This is just a minor thing, but in the line, "Unbothered , Lazy and dazed," you should not have a space between "Unbothered" and the comma and "Lazy" should not have a capital "L".

I think this could use some stanzas to break it up a bit. I know formatting is tricky on this site, but there is a way around it. When you start a new line, hold down shift + enter. This will single-space the lines. When you want a new stanza, just press enter. This will double-space the lines (as you have them now). I hope this helps in the future!

Besides those three small things, I really did enjoy reading and reviewing this poem! I hope you post some more soon. *likes* and *follows*

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Really good poem very motivational

Immediately I read:'The nation needs a spark, a flicker, a thumping' and thought to myself that this was an awesome poem/speech. This is because you used the 'power of three' with bold and even a catchy set of words. The poem is very rhythmic and full of energy throughout which is emphasised when you repeat 'just a spark, will make our mark. The only thing I would change is a:' smooth whack' because although it fits in with the poem by rhyming, I'm not sure it fits in with the formal words such as 'catalysed' and 'disintegration.' More importantly though, the overall message is clear and I can say that I'm inspired and I'm sure others are too! Have a happy holiday and I would love to read more of your work.

It is a very good poem.It can motivates this generation a lot.The way of writing is very admirable. i liked the way you repeated the line 'just a spark'.Please keep on posting.I will surely follow you.And once again amazing poem.

Very motivating

Cool

Hey, Sybil here!

First thing's first, welcome to YWS!

I liked how idealistic this is! More of a speech than a poem, if I may say. Good job expressing that love! I salute you to this piece's message! Just a few things you need to work on....

"Aim, motive, hardwork and equity" [You need a space between hard work]

"Will induce economic and social progress and equality." [it kinda sounds better if you only mention 'and' once before 'equality']

"We need to focus and synchronize to create strength unfazed." [you could break the line at 'synchronize' because the rest, though it is good, could stand independent for the stave.]

"Join forces and we will go leaps and bounds," [Are you implying that 'leaps and bounds' is/are a place/s?]

"Get up to build and develop and to construct," [Your repetition broke. 'Get up to build, to develop and to construct' sounds more like it]


And that's it! I hope this helps. Overall, it was good, the fire's heat was felt! Keep on writing!
Keep on Dreaming!

-Sybil (WaltzingDreams)