This was amazing. It was so beautiful too, and it's about your brother. I won't ask any questions... It will lead me to many more assumtions as to everything... This is why I read your poems and stories (Aside from the fact I like you):
seep
contained
sonyheadphones
shrapnels
forming
aureole
innocent mind
reflection
rest
unused
abandoned
exist
different
Big words, these are also very descriptive and set lovely images to mind. Yup, This was great. I can't really give you much although in the last stanza you used the word bed twice, ad that kinda bugged me. You could have said "And I lay there.." and left it at that. *shrugs* Let me try using this word in a proper sentence.... this was a very brilliant and benevolent (that word) piece and I hope your inspiration hasn't died towards your older brother.
Points: 890
Reviews: 1160
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