Published January 22, 2013
“A Path to Take”
By: Allice-mae Novaka
I hear two voices in my head;
the echoes entrancing my mind.
What words do the spiders spin;
when weaving their webs of wit?
One mouth holds a slippery snake;
the other a dove of destiny.
But which one leads to my desire;
and which to my immolation?
One spits out poisoned passion;
and one lies silver silence.
Each joker is cunning but not I;
for I cannot fathom the axiom.
I can’t tell if this path is well;
through the intertwined vines of truth.
So I shall take a leap of faith;
and see though which door I fall.
If I choose right it shall be my delight;
to break this code of chaos.
And in the end, my ear will I lend;
to wherever this voice should lead me.
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141,690 Literary Works • 675,575 Reviews
As soon as I got to the end of the first stanza, I'm like "Oh. Wow." And I had to keep going.
Mysterious. Deep, yet light and at the same time. It makes me think, while it pulls me in, but I'm not too overwhelmed.
The pacing is excellent and the rhythm is fantastic.
The description and vivid imagery is pleasing to the eye and holds the reader captive.
Wow. Just totally....Wow.
Great job. It's quite beautiful and I can't really find anything to criticize.
Absolutely wonderful piece, a delight to read.
It starts well, draws you in, holds you and lets you go... before you want to dive right back in again, that is!
I found the structure of the poem great, and the pacing (beats were regular and consistent), and the rhyme-scheme (or lack of) didn't even cross my mind, at all.
Imagery was vivid and powerful, especially the recurring imagery of flight, animals, silence and speech - it was all there, and it was all beautiful!
There's really not a lot I can scrutinise or say what hasn't already been said - so I won't. I'll just let you know that this was a beautiful poem to read, and mull over, and to keep on writing!
If you have any comments or queries about this review, just let me know
I really like this review! It's really pretty (unlike this reply) and inspiring! I'm honestly not that good at writing good replies to people's comments, but I'd just like you to know I'm really thankful to you for your comment!
Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful.
The imagery, particularly in this part of this stanza, is excellent. You can see that one door or path is a possibly poisonous road with treachery lying ahead, and the other is the cushioned life of peace. Again, beautiful.
However, the paths don't seem evenly balanced. It seems like she should automatically choose the path of the dove, and therefore the indecision later in the poem feels strange. But maybe I'm just thinking of what I would do.
Thanks so much for reviewing. I guess the point is that you don't know which to trust. You know in the riddle where one gate keeper only tells the truth, while the other lies? I think thats what the person here is feeling. Sometimes you don't know what or who you can trust, so just pick a door and find out the answer.