Together....
Maybe this is how fathers and sons are..
two oceans facing each other,
tides full of love
they do not know how to name.
Too proud to say,
too similar to bend,
too late to explain.
But love was there.
In every unpaid comfort.
In every unspoken apology.
In every missed hug.
If only we had known
that hearts do not weaken
when they speak.
If only we had said
what we carried.
Now, between heaven and memory,
between regret and gratitude,
a bridge is finally built—
not of discipline,
not of silence,
but of understanding.
And in that quiet place
where pride no longer lives,
a father whispers,
“I always loved you.”
A son replies,
“I know.”
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Namaste, this is shakthi
For all the things a father couldn't say.
For all the things a son couldn't ask.
For every apology swallowed by pride.
For every “I love you” hidden behind silence.
Maybe some words arrive too late.
But perhaps understanding can arrive even later.
Their story began with things left unsaid.
It ends with two voices finally saying what they had been carrying all along.
“I always loved you.”
“I know.”
Thank you for reading.
This is beautiful, bro. As someone who grew up a man and still is one and who also had a father, i understand how tough having a good relationship with your dad is when he is older, and this prom perfectly represents how even if he is a little alienating, he like most parents, still loves his children. Very well more!
Hi! I'm here to review your poem this morning
This is a very strong and interesting opening; I love the imagery that this evokes. Two oceans: so similar yet different, but always connected in the end, as we are with family. It captures proximity without touching, which seems to be the main theme about fathers and sons here.
This triad is also very strong. It's repetitive, but with an escalating specificity that elevates the emotional nature, and it also evokes a strong image, that I can relate to with my own father, that there can be love even if we don't physically hug or talk about feelings.
Ending on dialogue is a nice touch and brings alive the father/son characters that have been built up.
I think the things that could be improved about this poem centre on telling rather than showing. For example, "too proud," "too similar," "too late" are all abstract judgments about the father/son relationship rather than specific images of it. Even one specific image, perhaps specific to your own relationship, if that is what it is based on, would make that emotionality deeper and less generic. It's same in lines like "Between heaven and memory, / between regret and gratitude", which stacks two abstract pairings together where it might be stronger to only have one. I also like the ending, but I think it happens a little fast after all the abstract build-up. One or two more grounded and sensory details would really help elevate the poem!