a 2000's fad

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lately, i have been feeling

a bit like a tricycle leaning up against the side of the garage.

the third wheel is loose, the hand bars are rusting, and some old & tired vines are hugging it to the bricks. not entirely irreparable,

but no one has come with a wrench to tighten the bolts

& no one has come with clippers to wrestle away the vines

and after all, why would they. we have all traded in our scooters for bicycles and driver's licences

long ago.

to be a tricycle is to be obsolete, i think. 

i am waiting for my friends to outgrow my nostalgia,

the nostalgia of scraped knees and sidewalk chalk mixed in with moss and silly bandz wrapped around wrists and owl city blasting on the radio and a car bumper stitched together with duck tape.

then, finally, someone will scoop me up and take me to the dump 

and perhaps i will be recycled into something more practical than this

thing

i am

Comments & reviews · 6
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Hello!
This poem shows that some things lose their purpose once better things are offered. Starting with a tricycle and then a scooter, and then a bicycle, ending with someone getting their license to soon own a car. This comparison is so well done, mainly because its so relatable for so many people. The overgrown vines and poor condition the tricycle is in; that shows that we forget certain aspects of our childhood. Some people make sure to keep their childhood alive, by keeping those old toys and those memories in good condition. Others simply forget to, and it may not affect them much, but life would be so much better if you could remember the good times of your past. I know I don't want to lose my childhood, because so far, it has shaped me into the person I am, and the person I will be for the rest of my life. What you learn early sticks wth you.

Saying that you'll be recycled into something more practical can be seen as taking a lost memory and giving a new one to someone who may have never experienced anything like that before. Like giving your old toy to your child, you hope they can have just as much fun as you did when you were their age.
Overall, a great poem with a great message.

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Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed the poem :)

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rida
Review
rida wrote a review · Tue Mar 07, 2023 2:42 pm

Hi Seirre!! This poem is so beautiful!!! I loved the way it introduced the metaphor at the beginning and then extended it into this poem!
I loved how the metaphor seemed to grow newer dimensions and realities as the piece developed, and the enjambment and stanza structure fit really well with the theme in the poem. One of my favourite things about this poem is how you introduce the images and then add onto the meaning of them; this allows the reader to grasp the image and setting before the meaning is introduced.
I only had one minor doubt about this line of the poem:

“to be a tricycle is to be obsolete…”

Because I think you could really elongate and stretch out the emotions in this by adding a few more lines to it- maybe experiment with some comparisons?

Honestly though, this poem is so good. There were so many lines in the poem that felt perfect for that particular emotion, and I’m so glad you decided to share this poem!!<33333

Keep writing!

-Rida

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starlitmind
Comment

STOP I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU POSTED A NEW POEM OH MY GOSH-

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deleted48
Review

my favourite poet!

i have some form of energy, so i might as well review ~

lately, i have been feeling

a bit like a tricycle leaning up against the side of the garage.


oh mood. don't we all?

i really like the enjambment here. i see it as the narrator being disconnected from themselves in a way? like "lately i've been feeling / a bit like a tricycle" is separating the human nature (the act of feeling) from the tricycle (representation of the narrator). this actually happens a lot growing up since your mind & body are doing completely different things (as in, feeling vs "leaning up against the side of the garage"). i'm probably reading into this, but that's what poetry is about.

we have all traded in our scooters for bicycles and driver's licences long ago.


now this is solid - you could probably write an entire poem based on just this line. it's not the same "you can't fix me, i have to fix myself" vibe you have going on, but more a coming-of-age, accepting what's happening kind of line. people go through changes, and that's totally fine. it's sad, but it's something that everyone deals with.

who is the "we" in this context though? if the narrator is still seeing themself as a tricycle (feeling immature, not "adult" enough), they haven't moved on. the first person pov is actually a great choice, but i'm not sure about that aspect.

to be a tricycle is to be obsolete, i think.


dude it's craaaazy how some basic idea like a bike can mean so much. this whole poem is just "oh wow i am growing up and also i am changing and so are my friends," and this line specifically sums it up perfectly. it's bittersweet because it's true, which makes it hit even closer to home; tricycles are for children, a thing of the past.

then, finally, someone will scoop me up and take me to the dump

and perhaps i will be recycled into something more practical than this

thing

i am


beautiful ending. i think it's the best part.

i actually think it's not as angsty as it seems though; they are not being destroyed, they are being recycled. it's like how a caterpillar becomes a butterfly. the whole lingering idea throughout the poem is how change is inevitable. we aren't children forever, and every person will be or already is aware of that. it's hard to imagine, but it's impossible to stop. change is good, and growing up is a part of life.

anyway keep writing poetry, this was pretty spiffy

best,
chi <3

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looseleaf
Comment

Seirre!! I absolutely loved this!! I love sad poems and stories that reminisce on the past, so this was perfect for me. Your metaphor of the tricycle is *chefs kiss*--how did you think of that?! It's incredible! I especially like the line(s):

and after all, why would they. we have all traded in our scooters for bicycles and driver's licences / long ago.

It totally encapsulates the mood of your piece and really ties it all together. It's my favorite metaphor in the whole poem. Have a good day!! #socialmonth

User avatar
yoshikrab
Review

Hey Seirre! I happened to chance across your poem here so I thought why not give it a review?

(On an unrelated note, I ALWAYS spell your username wrong. I switch the e and the i all the time)

Anyways, first of all, after reading through this poem, it gives me kind of a . . . sad vibe. It hurt to read, and the simile of the tricycle is just heartbreaking. Adding on to that, I love how you used a tricycle to describe the narrator. When you first think of a tricycle, it immediately points to thoughts about childhood, freedom, and all those fun times.

Not only is the tricycle abandoned, but it's also covered with vines and is perhaps out of commission? It looks like the bolts are getting unscrewed or something . . . I'm not a tricycle expert lol

From the beginning of the poem to the end, the narrator describes this quiet (strangely not very desperate) longing for childhood. Reading this had led me to wonder what it really means to grow up, and to leave things behind, but I don't really want to start talking about all that stuff, so let's move on to the rest of the poem.

we have all traded in our scooters for bicycles and driver's licences

long ago.


This.

This is so heartbreaking. It's simple, it's short, but it's powerful nevertheless. Sometimes, poets tend to associate powerful phrases with overdescriptive phrases, but in reality, I think the most powerful lines don't really have anything too special to them. They just hurt.

Anyways, this all tells such a nostalgic story. The narrator is lost in longing for the past, and seems aware of it too, while all of the narrator's friends have already moved on (getting their drivers' licenses)

then, finally, someone will scoop me up and take me to the dump

and perhaps i will be recycled into something more practical than this

thing

i am


Finally, the narrator seems to give up, almost? Like this poem is the narrator's last final plea for someone to come fix the tricycle, but in the end, gives up and says that someone will recycle the tricycle and make it into something better.

Plus, the last two emphasized lines seem to carry a tone of self-loathing that the rest of the poem didn't have. The change in tone is slight, but it's a quick little twist that gets the reader thinking.

Anyways, I wish you good luck with your writer's block! Everyone has been there, and I know from experience how hard it is to break.

Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to review this gem! (It hit me in the feels . . .)

-yosh

eggo isn't actually eggs



cron
"I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, between the shadow and the soul."
— Pablo Neruda