I will say this once, and I will say it true:
I'll get you back, if it's the last thing I do.
My plot I will brew, and oh how you'll rue!
Shame me once and shame on you.
.
I burn and I blaze; I'm the dragon's raw fire.
I wrath and I rage; I'm the sorcerer's ire.
Greet the grime with the tire, meet the muck and the mire,-
it's dirty when I play and the stakes get higher.
.
Planning and plotting, I devour the day.
Night knows no sleep, for awake I will lay.
How much have I lost? How much will this cost?
It doesn't really matter, – as long as you pay.
.
Forever remember, as long as you live:
I never forget and I never forgive.
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
Ah, sweet, sweet revenge....
I liked this. I really like the easy flow and the bit of fantasy in there ( the dragon and the sorcerer) really appealed to me. The entire time I pictured a witch stirring a pot of witch's brew and plotting her revenge. (maybe Halloween is getting to me.)
The only think I could say is that there are some cliches but then we are talking about a timeless thing like revenge so it's okay.
All in all, the last two lines were what really packed the punch. I now know there is no reasoning with the speaker and who ever is at the end of her anger will suffer.
GREAT job!
Thank you! Wow thanks for pointing out the connection with Halloween - even I didn't see that hehe. I wrote this a while ago so whatever ties it has with the holiday are purely coincidential!
I really liked this poem. At first I thought maybe the rhymes were too much, but then I realized it works here. Overall, I loved the word use and imagery; you really conveyed the feelings well.
The only thing I would say that caught my attention specifically would be the line, "Greet the grime with the tire, meet the muck and the mire,-", as I thought it was a little off time with the other lines that seem to fit so well syllable-wise. Obviously, if this was what you were intending then go with it.
Generally though, it's short and sweet and just what I like from a poem. Great job.
Why thank you! It's been a while, I wrote this last year so it probably won't get changed, but I appreciate your suggestion all the same!
Hello,
My name is Amber, and I wanted to tell you this is really good. I can feel your passion and rage in this. I really like your line: I burn and I blaze; I'm the dragon's raw fire. Its not very often I find something that has to do with dragons, I really like dragons. I can't wait to read more of your work. Keep up the good work.
Thank you!