Anime in our world WHAT?!?!

I huffed turning the other way, standing back up before he could pulled me down again, pulling out a tub of green gel. He ripped my gaze off my arm, revealing the large gash covered in yellow herbal mix. He took a knife out scrapping the herbal mix out. Sakura appeared shocked that I was letting him reopen a wound that deep. He opened the green tube squeezing the green gel into the wound pressing it down to the deepest part of the cut. Then we watched at the skin slowly mended together like magic as if it never happened.

“See, a proper lady, should never have visible scars on her body. Unless, your a true huntress then you just end up wearing them with pride.” he joked.

I kind of had this feeling that the Immortal legacy was real, after seeing the real green gel in action. I knew that Suske came from a clan in japan, that much I could tell. I turned to look at the others as I rubbed my arm gentle, the new skin tingled at my warm touch. I looked outside at the sun was now vanished behind the trees. I sighed, walking into the kitchen to help Nisan with the food.

I made some sweets, then I set the tables all together. I pulled a tablecloth over each of the tables setting up the silverware like a pro. The plates as well, Nisan called the ninja's to dinner. All of us consumed the food filling to the brim with delicious meat and sweets. Nothing was left but dirty dishes now. I helped clean them as Nisan and I chatted, before she had to go with Suske to the anime convention. I smiled at them and waved as they left me. My friends left for school started tomorrow. I gathered my school supplies getting things in a beeline ready. The boys wanted to go into this so called High School for a recon mission. I smirked wildly thinking about how they could manage in such a place. I made there sensei's fill out the registration forms. I lived five miles away from the school and always walked home and to school.

This was going to either be a disaster or a good thing. I awoke at the crack of dawn gathering my breakfast, eating it quickly then leaving the rest out for the stumbling teens to go and eat. I picked up a bucket and ran outside to go milk Mrs. Jersey. I smiled as I patted her hind end kindly as I pulled the full two gallon bucket of milk. I went back inside pouring a glass for each of the kids. What was left was left for the adults. I left them a note of todo list to achieve by the time I got back, which, was paint rooms and seal wood floors. Simple and neat I smiled inwardly. I grabbed my sketch book as I was leaving the art supplies room Sai looked inside the room lights lit his face.

“So do you draw?” he questioned with a fake smile.

I handed him my sketch book to go through. He was utterly surprised at the pictures of dragons at different positions each looking like elegant creators. I grabbed it back as the jocks of the school appeared out of the school hollering at me, all the disrespect full names in the book. This made the ninja cringe. I pulled away from the jocks as one snatched my arm pulling me back. He spat chewing tobacco into my face calling me a slut.

“Call your nasty words at me all you what, but they will never hurt me, they just say that your weak and you have to pick on someone to make yourselves feel better” I spat back. Giving the boy the finger as I walked away.

That was the football team for you, nasty brutes they are and always have been to me. I went into my first class which was gym I loved this class. I went into the girls locker room with the other girls. They all started to gossip about what I had done this morning. The ninja girls were rather shocked on how even the girls treated me as if, I were some sort of beast that didn't deserve to live. I sighed. Pulling on my sports bra and shorts on. Thats what the girls on the gym wore was just gym shorts and sports bra. At least these were special kinds of sports bras, they still fitted into the school rules. But to me they still showed way to much. I guess it was so we could be lookers for the guys or something because this school used to be an all boys school.

Even our teacher disliked me along with the rest of the town. I kind of felt like Naruto in the beginning of the series, but unlike him, I had no monster or anything that they should treat me like this for. I walked outside running my eight laps around the inside track then doing my stretches. I went after that straight to the pull up bar. My friends Had already graduated from school due to the fact they were two years older than I was. I was 18 now at least I think I was. I pulled myself onto the gymnastics bar. I started my work out like usual. They would let me do whatever I wanted while the rest of the class did things completely different. Knowing I could conquer them all in any sports or at least thats what they told me. I sometimes really felt like Rudolf not being able to play the same games.

I Jumped down at the end of class, picking up my bag heading towards the girls locker room. I got changed quickly. I turned to face Sakura, Naruto, and Sai. I sighed and stood there just at the door of the locker room.

“Yes?” I questioned with a raised brow.

Naruto latched a huge so tight I could barely breath.

“I never knew there were people that treated each other like this.” he almost cried.

“Well they do now, if you will let me get to my college class now.” I added side stepping away from his hug.

He released me, but, still followed even though Shino, and I were the only ones taking that class. Anatomy for insects obviously. He was discussed that we were going to take apart a hissing cockroach. I turned with the scapulae in hand, and sliced gently down the legs. I slid the leg onto a glass dish putting it under the microscope looking at them. There were smaller bugs living on the hairs as well. I shivered, looking back at the one leg less moving hissing cockroach. I pushed the tray with the cockroach towards Shino. He looked at me disgusted at the scapulae. He took it from my hand. The teacher was preaching about how once you take the leg from the cockroach that it will be fine it would still live even after a leg was severed from the body. I felt ready to hurl, Why I picked this class is no clue to me. I still had straight A's in it nonetheless.

After the next four classes came lunch. I refused to eat, Choji took the free lunch I handed it to him. I had to sit near the trash cans to escape from farther bulling. My hair was covered in trash now as a jock and his girlfriend said

“Whoops. We missed the trash can again didn't we,” they laughed evilly

I growled deeply at them making their laughter come short, the girl stood at me pointing and laughing along with her friends.

“The girl who growls, I would think you would snap, then we could get rid of you from our town as soon as you do. Oh and Your art skills suck.” she snapped with laughter.

My fingernails cut into my hand making small drops of blood pool into my hand. The ninja were ready to attack them if they needed to to defend me.

“Ever since your friends left for college, all you do is sit there emotionless and empty like the monster you are. What did you do? suck their souls out and kill them?” they question.

I slammed my hand down on the tabled so hard, that it left a large dent into the table my hair flared up as I turned to face the Gossip queens.

“Keep your slutty mouths shut OR ELSE” I screamed.

“Oh that's strike Three Miss Tamara Detention tonight.” the principal said as he passed by narrowing his beady eyes.

“Oh Crap,” I cursed under my breath.

I sat back down picking the trash out of my hair. After school, I had to send the ninja back home, but Sai refused to go with. He looked back at me briefly, before, re-entering behind me back into the school. The principal was tapping the seat with a ruler in a fast rhythm. I sat down as he stood in the front of the classroom. My eyes could tell that Sai was there but, he was using ninjutsu or genjutsu something to keep him hidden in plain sight. I waited for the principal to start preaching about the rights I have while being in this school and elsewhere.

“Tamara, Tamara, Tamara.” He clicked his tongue.

“Yes sir,” I answered softly looking down.

Anger flashed in his little green orbs, he slammed his ruler down sharply on my table, my eyes flickering quickly to his. His hand was shaking as it wanted to grip me by my hair and yank it out of my head. I barely even flinched when his voice started to blare my eardrums.

“Tamara! This is the last straw! You will not disrespect me or your fellow students! I thought we agreed the last time. That you wouldn't have any more outbursts. This, this will end today. I'm sorry to have to say this but Tamara you will be forced into the exchange program. You will be going far away from here for your senior year. And you will be not aloud to come back in the middle of the year do you understand.” he ordered.

“Yes sir,” I saluted

“Stop that it's disrespectful. And don't make a fool out of me.” he snarled standing up finally. Now that I knew that I was going to be shipped off else where. I had the right to speak my mind.

“Well, Sir, I never disrespected anyone who did not have it coming to them.” I growled my grey eyes flashed making the old man cower back. I gathered my crap and walked out the door and turned to glare deadly one last time.

“And I hope you are forgiven for what you've done to me. For the amount everyone else has done. Because, I will someday forgive all that you've done to me, for I am stronger than you think emotionally. I was never really going to hurt any one physically, sure I had a few outbursts, but they were only verbal.” I added calmly as I left the classroom

I slid my books into my backpack handing the textbooks back at the front desk. The lady frowned saying she was sorry for how almost everyone treated me, she was a very kind sweet person to everyone including me. My backpack had nothing in it but notes now. I turned to look at Sai as he jumped outside the building with me. Susi appeared exposing himself to Sai as well. I hushed him with a hand covering Sai's mouth as he pointed shocked.

“Susi, will you take Sai home and me to Farmer Joe's?” I asked.

“Of course Princess,” he bowed politely

He lowered his head for us to step onto. I held onto Sai as I instructed to hold on with his chakra. But I never had to because Susi would feed me his to hold me down. I still had only uncovered half of my past. I was still working on that though it was so painful to remember. That night when I made it home Nisan and Suske were there with, Zachariah, Brad, and Icky. They watched me as I entered.

“So what was it this time?” they questioned all in unison

I sighed throwing my backpack into the stone column hard it clattered loudly resonating in the large room. I was lividly peed off, I cursed in rants that would make sailor's cringe in fear. My friends all backed into a corner, letting me vent off my anger in my swells of rants. Naruto came running into late not being able to stop, before he got in the target zone of my rage. I cursed as if he were the principal of the school and Naruto started taking steps back soon he was hiding behind Nisan.

Nisan stood motherly as she put a hand on each of my shoulders.

“What is your sentence this time?” she questioned Cooly her eyes instantly staring into mine calming me immediately.

“He's forcing me into the exchange program, so they are pretty much going to ship me where ever they Flipping want to for my SENIOR YEAR!” I cursed vehemently shaking with anger again just at the thought.

Nisan tightened her grip on my shoulders.

“Somehow, I knew he'd do something like this.” She took a long breath and looked down at me for a second. “Dear, you're going to have to show him that you will pass with flying colors, without a discipline report whatsoever. In turn you will achieve greatness. I just have an idea of where he would send you.” she finished. “Gather clothing as if you were heading into winter.” she added quickly.

She left as I stomped out of the Ballroom going to the Art room opening my clothing drawl. I pulled out my duffle bag, stuffing my winter gear into it. Which consist of, Crocheted hats, scarfs, some leggings, X-L long sleeved shirts that were given to me. I never had any new clothing. I pulled out a winter dress. Its thick ruffles were filled with fleece on the inside that would keep my legs and torso nice and cozy, I found it in the old hotel's endless amount of trunks. I packed all my cargo pants and put in my only good pair of shoes along. I had a few dress shirts but only like two with long sleeves I had my laced boots Icky gave me a few weeks ago. They where commando with plus two inches on the platform side. I fit all of my clothing into the duffle bag with plenty of room to spare. I put in my Winter blanket and pillow, Still left over room. I looked at my supplies I pulled out my pencils Sai had walked into my art room. That was the size of a large closet.

“So Like what you see?” I questioned.

He picked up the different color of pen inks I had for drawing, and paint I had for painting. I even had the brushes all lined up some where much older than I was, I had salvaged them from upstairs where the doll maker kept his brushes in a sealed container, that is thankfully so they were still in really good condition. I had some of the china dolls that had not been finished yet. One had rotted blond hair which I had completely replaced with Icky's hair when she got it chopped off from her waist to her shoulders.

I picked the doll with the waist long hair and no face. Icky always said it looked so strange without a face and she didn't want to be the model for the eyes and mouth. I turned to set the china doll back on the shelf delicately. I looked around as I stood up on my little stool I pulled out a box of filled sketchbooks. All from each year I've lived here. Setting it on the small table that I had in here, the table had two stools. Sitting down on the other, pulling out the one from the very bottom. I had doodled with only charcoal due to the fact I didn't have pencils at the moment of life. Then after I learned I could draw better with pencils than with chunks of charcoal from the fireplace.

So, in a matter of words you can see the transition from charcoal drawings to corny Pencil drawings I had not gone through these in forever, they were bringing so many things to my mind. When I was little I was always loved trying to draw a places that was much different than this world. It was with mountains and dragons everywhere even though most of these drawings they were stick people and dragons. But as the years progressed you could see the shift from stick drawings to 2-D art, to Nature's 3-D world. I smiled as I looked at my Fifth grade sketchbook. I had drawled my first Dragon in full fledged detail. The art teacher had left a nice comment on the back. She had been a new teacher that year. She was the only nice lady teacher I had ever met in my lifetime so far.

I hoped that whatever hell hole they sent me to now would be better than the one I had been in now. I stood up making Sai sit back down. I pulled out a small sketch book that was brand new It had japanese already on the front. It read 'Thou art shall blossom for all to see'. I handed it to him with a wink. As I put up my old sketchbooks. I jumped off my stool and set it back by the table. I fumbled out my sketch book from this morning. In my second period class I had drawn a picture of them Visiting the Old hotel. On the first page of his sketch book, I drawled a picture of; Me, Icky, Zachariah, Brad, Nisan, Suske, and the old hotel as the background. All in the finest detail possible as if it was literally a snap shot of a picture. I had even gone back and put color into it. It really did look like a snapshot of us.

“This new sketch book I'm giving you, Is one you can fill with your friends and family. Or whatever you want to. I love the japanese saying on the front. 'Thou art shall blossom for all to see' And I drew the picture of you people meeting us as I drew a picture of you all visiting here.” I smiled.

“Hai”He said and thanked me.

I shook my head.

“No thank you all for unlocking my past.” I added with a smile.

Comments & reviews · 2
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

User avatar
OliveDreams
Review

GOOD MORNING! Here to review for the Epic Ice Cream Warriors of Pluto on this fine review day. Yes, that really is our name.

This will take me a loooooong time so, I will review as I read so that it will make a lot more sense to both me and you! I tend to get a little muddled up otherwise.

Here goes :)

1. The first paragraph is a lot of 'tell' and not 'show. You need to let the reader use a bit of the imagination on their own. For example, you tell us all that is happening here in a kind of step by step guide. All we needed was,
'Turning the other way, I stood and huffed, before he could pull me down again. Who did he think he was? Yanking on my arm, he ripped the gauze off my large gash, covered in slow herbal mix and before I could protest, he used a knife to being scraping the mix out. I could see the shock on Sakura's face, watching as I let him open a wound so deep.'

2. I love how you really know your characters inside out. I don't feel like theres a person on a computer constructing them - I feel as though they're real and that is an amazing skill to have!

3. I wish I could connect to her a little more a the moment - I feel like she hasn't show me any thing human like in a while.

4. You need capital letters when you use the words Japan and Japanese.

5. I completely agree with ForgottenSpellbinder - You need to vary the way you start your sentences . I've shown you a little how to do that in number 1. It just a case of swapping the words in your sentences around a little!


Good luck! I look forward to reading some more of your work soon :)

Olive <3

Thank you so much for your input! I can't thank you two enough. I'm so happy that I have people like you helping me along the way. I'll make sure to go over all of this information before I submit the next chapter to this story. I promise to be adding more human features to Tamara you will be seeing them very soon!

Anytime! :) Just message me when you have anything new up and I'll head straight on over!

User avatar
malachitear
Review

Woah. As an anime fan, I am partial to this.

I liked the fact that used naruto characters in here, too, but maybe this was more suited to another, anime related forum? It's not exactly fanfiction, but you might want to include some indication because some prior understanding is rather needed here :D

You started off straight into the action. That's great! However, I think you were lacking a bit in explanation, since if we knew a little more about what was going on, I think the starting would have made a lot more of an impact.

I liked the ending line too, because you closed off on a pleasant note.

There are grammar ans capitalization errors, so look through it again first!

One thing I want to point out, stylistically.

Here:

I kind of felt like Naruto in the beginning of the series, but unlike him, I had no monster or anything that they should treat me like this for. I walked outside running my eight laps around the inside track then doing my stretches. I went after that straight to the pull up bar. My friends Had already graduated from school due to the fact they were two years older than I was. I was 18 now at least I think I was. I pulled myself onto the gymnastics bar. I started my work out like usual. They would let me do whatever I wanted while the rest of the class did things completely different. Knowing I could conquer them all in any sports or at least thats what they told me. I sometimes really felt like Rudolf not being able to play the same games.


I hope you see a lot of 'I's. One thing you could do is to really vary the sentence structure, because i think that this ca really affect a reader's interest in your writing. This also implies a lot of narration in this story, and while that is okay, to go the next step, you really have to show the reader more than just tell them what is going on. Look through other paragraphs and you'll see what I mean :D On the same note about sentence structure, do you notice the on-italicized bolded portion up there being repeated a few times before? It is important to be conscious of your writing tendencies, because otherwise it seems that you lack variation!

But on the whole, this was still quite alright, and interesting too.

All the best!

-Binder

Thank you for your input. I'm really trying to go back and edit something that I wrote almost a year or more ago... So I will constantly be editing it according to how people respond to it. So I deeply thank you for this and I hope you will continue to help me along the way.



You cannot have a positive life and a negative mind.
— Joyce Meyer