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Waves and Winds

by Sai9


The cold breeze of

who I am meant to be

moves the waves of destiny

onto the sandy beaches of tomorrow

-

But who blows these wicked winds?

is he a deity working towards a plan for me?

or rather the gravity of my own

will to be free

-

Possibly it is society that holds the

wheel to mental prosperity 

none, the sinner nor the saved

hold moral superiority 

-

Can it be that nobody 

God, or you and me

have ability over this salty sea

of possibility


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117 Reviews


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Reviews: 117

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Tue Dec 08, 2020 1:14 pm
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LUNARGIRL wrote a review...



Great poem! I love how descriptive it and your word choice tie the poem beautiful together. The questions of potential, freedom, morality, destiny, and society, are questions that every person wants to know in their life. You ask such good questions in the poem and you make it so emotional.

My favorite line was probably in the third stanza.
"Possibly it is society that holds the wheel to mental prosperity."
I don't know why I like this line so much, it just feels right.

Overall I really liked this poem. You put so much emotion and description into it. You also asked all questions that everyone wants the answer to. Can't wait to read what you write next!

Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL




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57 Reviews


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Mon Dec 07, 2020 3:55 pm
hannah0528 wrote a review...



Hi! I'm here for a quick review. I loved this poem! You had really good words. I loved how descriptive it was, and the questions it asked are the right ones to ask. I only have one minor, nit-picky critique. When it said,

"Can it be that nobody

God, or you and me

have ability over this salty sea

of possibility" is a question without a question mark.
That is all. And that did not affect how much I loved it. I hope to hear more from you! Merry Christmas. Keep writing!


Hannah




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12 Reviews


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Mon Dec 07, 2020 1:34 pm
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Denizen wrote a review...



oooh chilling. There's a lot to dive into here. The overall poem is quite beautiful-The questions of destiny, freedom, morality, society, potential, it links together well while also providing a variety of points to consider. Also, the rhyme scheme, it really pulls the piece together. I think my favourite line has to be "Or rather the gravity of my own will to be free,", it just hits the mark, at least for me. A wonderful poem, and I look forward to (hopefully) reading more from you.




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45 Reviews


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Mon Dec 07, 2020 6:17 am
stygianmoon17 says...



Will review this later today*





I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.
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