Young Writers Society

Hello, the one and only Foxmaster here!!!
oh ho ho, what a story! I applaud *cue emoji*👏 Wait, so you're in this story? You died? This was confusing and yet interesting. Some thoughts....
JabberHut frowned and turned to the doctor for confirmation. She was wearing a white long-coat and her clipboard had frostbite.
Just a question: How can a clipboard get frostbite? Is Jabberhut another member on here?
“How else would I keep the bodies preserved?” The doctor raised her head and nodded at bed two. “Another dead this morning. Do you want it to smell like a grave?”

JabberHut slowly shook her head, her expression aghast. “You're keeping the bodies in here?”

“Well it is the morgue,” the doctor said. She turned and slowly walked away.

Jabber turned to Rydia and reached out for her cold, stiff hand. “I don't think he's a real doctor,” Jabber said.
Talk about suspicion... this sounds like something from Wednesday..... I'm interested now........ where is this going?
Jabber turned to Rydia and reached out for her cold, stiff hand.
'cold stiff hand"... yup, they are dead.
And that's all! Can't wait to review more of your work! Also, If your are interested in some of my work, that would be great! :p
-Foxmaster!!! (the one and only!)

Confusing, yet interesting.

I'm left pondering over the nature of the place the scene take place in. I also think whether the characters are dead.

To be honest, I was doing all right when this came up: "Well it is the morgue". It changed everything. I thought it was some poor hospital operating at a time of war and epidemic, but then when the affirmation of the place being a morgue erupted, every reader gets spooked out.

Well, I like it, although it's unclear. But then again I think that was creatively deliberate.
Cheers!

Hey Pulchra!

I'll be completely ignoring the 'Satire' bit this is labeled as, and review this completely seriously as if this was a 100% honest piece of literature on YWS.

Now, I'll admit I don't review a lot of fanfiction, or flash fiction for that matter, but YWS fiction is pretty great, so yay, review! Now, I now the premise behind this, and it was rather... challenging, however, this is a surprising result. Positively or negatively I'm not sure! This may have poetic meaning (I repeat, I'm going ahead and reviewing this as if it had meaning), but I just don't get it.

I'm not quite sure how you and Jabsy ended up in a morgue, let alone living in one. That last line screams necrophilia to me, although it might be something I'm not getting. Maybe you're both zombies?

Either way, this was puzzling, but not an entirely unpleasant piece to read!

Hope this helped
~Ita


//cackle