Distant

Shadows everywhere... I find myself surrounded by the shadows of this shameful world. The shadows continue to engulf my very presence, draining every inch of my life. Running as fast as I can, I immediately try to escape this treachery. Minute by minute, as the shadows fade away, I hear a faint whisper grasping onto me. I tried to ignore it, but the echoes of the whispers continued to leech on me. The whispers grew louder, and louder repeating the same phrase over and over, and so I stopped. I glared at the world I despise so much, acknowledging my erased existence. I vanish, listening to the final whisper, the final whisper of my own voice.

"What did you accomplish?"

I awaken in a faint, dull room. This place is as quiet as ever. My own breath is the only sound I hear in this place. I wonder what time is it? I tried to search for my phone with my hand, but my body, completely glued to the bed, wouldn't let me move any further. "Now where is it?" I desperately try to scavenge for my phone but I soon gave up. I relaxed on my bed, and stared at complete darkness. Minutes soon pass, and as soon as I rest my eyes; I heard a little growl inside of me. I tried to ignore the noise, but it grew louder. I gulped several times to see if it would stop, but it didn't help. I couldn't sleep any more. This little fiend will continue to rant until it's satisfied. I rolled off my bed, and turned on the lights. The immediate brightness shuttered my eyes until I was able to see clearly. I grabbed my jacket, and put it on. I soon find my phone on the ground, only to find that it was dead. I plugged it into the charger, and took my wallet. Now it's time for me to leave, so I promptly put on my hood, and left my place.

Closing my door, I see many lights appearing inside many of the apartments, especially the one next door. The autumn breeze brought a chill to me, but I didn't mind. I quickly left without anyone noticing me next door. Walking down the stairs, I looked at the ground as someone passed by me. I tried to pretend that person didn't see me, and I hope that person didn't care who I was. I closed the gate of the apartments, and walked off. This small area is pretty quiet, which is what I enjoy. It makes me feel calm, and relaxed. This area doesn't have much, a small alley road, parked cars, and several apartment sections. There's really nothing much, but it's convenient because that world is right beside it. I can get all the things I need there. Soon enough, I entered the world; where most of the nuisance is.

People everywhere... this is heavily populated by the society that lives here. One thing I hate is that it's so crowded around here. Every shop is filled with these people. I just wanted to avoid all of them. Luckily, the place I'm going to does not have that many people. I traveled across the clouds of noise, and laughter surrounding me. I simply put my hands in pockets, and continued looking at the ground as I go on. I would like to think no one notices me, but they probably do. However, they're probably too busy with their own lives to even think about me. This pathway seems endless, as people are walking by me. I wonder what they're facial impressions are since I can only see their feet. I finally arrive at my destination. A place filled with wonderful varieties of meat sandwiches at a great price. This fast food restaurant... This place has decent food at a good price, nice environment, and barely any people. Mainly because there are better and fancier restaurants all across this world.

"Welcome to Tasties! How may I take your order."

"Um...a-a Tasties special would be okay." Looking confused as to what to get because I already tried everything here.

"Will that be it, sir?"

"Yeah"

"That will be $4 total." I handed her the money, letting her keep the change because I didn't really want it.

"I would also like to say, thank you, you're the only person that really goes here. Sad news is that because you're the one of the few that comes here, we might close down pretty soon." I was shocked, I didn't know what to say. A whisper told me to avoid the problem, and so I listened.

"It's a shame. I really don't want this place to close down, it's been my go to place for so long."

"Yeah, I'm sorry. But on the bright side, all of us employees are working hard at advertising."

"How about I..." avoid it... it's not your problem. There's other places to eat. Avoid it.

"Nevermind."

"Oh, well here's your food. Enjoy!" I sat down deliberately savoring the meal, knowing I won't be able to eat this soon. This place isn't half bad as people think it is. This place is an independent restaurant, and the cooking is held in the back with I hope fresh produce. Well, at least this place is better than the chained fast food restaurants. There's a man that was eating, trying to talk to me, but I ignored him. When I finished, I went all the way back to my place, leaving that world. I turned on my phone to see it was 9 PM. I went back to bed, feeling exhausted.

Thump. Thump. I rolled around my bed, and tried to ignore it. Thump. Who could that be? I quietly got up, and walked to the door. I peeked through the peep hole, and there was a man. My heart was racing, and with so many questions. Who is he? Why is he here? Is he going to rob me? Should I open the door? I was tempted to open it, but then I heard something inside of me. It was screaming to me to not open it. I felt calm now, and I listened to what I had to do. The knocks still continued, I sat down, and waited by the door. When it finally stopped, I looked through the peep hole, and he was finally gone. Mission success.

My little realm that I enjoy so much. This place is rather small, however, it provides everything I need. The living room contains my bed, and several books to the side of it. There’s an extremely small kitchen and bathroom, and that’s all there is. I sat in my stool, and peeked through the curtains of my window. People. The day is a bother, people are awake at this time, and they love to walk by this area. I stared through the curtains seeing a car pass by every now and then. I went back on my bed, and continued my slumber.

What’s the time right now? 2:07 PM. I got up, and noticed several letters by the door. I grabbed them, looking at all the ads that were provided. I found a letter from my parents; the presence of the letter felt weird. They felt like strangers to me. I read what they had to say, and took in some thought on their suggestion. I’ll visit them soon. I set that aside, and ate a couple of snacks. I felt empty. I thought about my parents for a while. They were people I should know, and care about, yet I hardly knew anything about them now. I stayed at a hospital for quite sometime, and they visited me every single day. When I was finally taken out last summer, I still had no connections to them. I felt a long distance between me and my parents. I spent a month at my parent’s house, but shortly moved out. I couldn’t bare anymore awkward connections. I was also constantly reminded to leave them by the voice. I noticed my snacks were running out. I took the last bite of my snack, and finally departed from my place.

I kept myself hidden from my surroundings by simply hiding inside my hood. It's always bright during the day, making me feel exposed, open to the world. I needed to get the snacks quickly. I was going to one of my favorite shops, keeping my hood over my face as I walked casually.The shop was extremely convenient, located right near my apartment building, consisting of drinks, liquor, and snacks. It’s a small shop with barely any people; something that is just perfect for me. I reached for the door of the shop, but then heard a loud noise from a distance. It sounded as if a trash can had fallen over. I entered the shop, and ran into a person. I looked around; the entire shop was filled. What’s going on? I immediately left, without ever knowing what was happening. I decided to go to another shop that is farther away. It's worth the time, and its better than having to stay in a crowd.

I wish I could've seen the sunset, but I refused to do so. With my face covered, I just stared at the ground admiring the footsteps of people. As I kept walking, I felt a strange presence nearby. The people of this world is probably giving me this strange feeling, so I walked a bit faster. Sweat dripping off me, the heat increasing, I immediately took off my hood. I felt the breeze cooled me down, as if an iceberg had just hit me. I turned up and looked around when I heard a cough. There was no one. No one was around me. This world was supposed to be filled, and busy, yet there's no one here. I put my hood back on, as I approached the door of the shop. I see it completely empty, the cashier is in the back. I grabbed my snacks, and headed towards the counter. I caught a shadow by the window, as I bought the snacks. I left the shop, and looked around. No one. I walked, uncovering my face, looking back every now and then. I felt as if someone was there watching me, trying to erase me. I started running, the air pushing against me, as I slice through it. I looked back, and see shadows. I ran faster, leaving this nightmare. This is awfully familiar. I then flew, my surroundings slowed during this very moment. Pow.

Where am I? I open my eyes, to see a woman.

“Are you okay?” She stared at me, looking panicked.

“I’m so sorry! I laid a stack of Tasties fliers on the ground, and it blew all over the place.”

“I’m fine, how about I help you clean this all up.” I smiled, and then I started to pick up the fliers. I ignored the voice inside me.

“Oh, thank you so much! The employees at Tasties decided to start advertising in stores, by giving free samples of the new products. I just happened to be late for work, so they gave me fliers to post up around the city.”

“Oh really? I hope it turns out well!” I looked at her, but then I looked at the ground. I froze, hearing a loud scream inside me. STOP! DO NOT HELP! I felt the emotions of this voice, tearing me apart. I got up, handed her the stack of fliers, took my snacks, and left. I don’t know what to do anymore. My desire to help is constantly being blocked by the voice that desires to avoid everything. I walked into an alleyway, and sat next to a dumpster. I put my hood back on, and ate the snacks. I don’t want to be away from people anymore, I want to help them. I noticed footsteps walked by me. It stopped, and it turned to my position. I looked up, to find a man in a hat with glasses on. His appearance brought a strange presence.

All I see is faded blurs. Hands appear, giving something to me. A man running, people everywhere, and the lurks of hatred was born. This all seem to dissolve, I see the man with glasses in tears.

"Who are you?" I looked at him, while he said nothing. Only tears, and sobbing was there. Disgusting. I got up, and walked away. I heard a soft voice as I left the alleyway.

"Maybe it's too soon."

Entering the world again, I see no stars in the sky, but the glow of lights really shine at this time. People began to appear left, and right. I stared at the ground, observing their movement as they walked by. Everyone passing by me, I felt transparent. This shameful world should continue to forget me. Leave me behind in isolation. I noticed a person standing, I look up. The Tasties restaurant is completely packed. I noticed a girl, that I met a while ago.

“Oh. It’s you! How are you?” I ignored her. I passed by her, breaking any bonds we develop. I destroyed it, crushing it to emptiness. The breeze became stronger. Where should I go? I continued to walk, admiring the footsteps of people. I took a road way, with nobody surrounding it, and so I kept walking. There was a hill that became more steep by the second. Once I reached the top, I stopped. I sat down, because of extreme exhaustion. I breathed heavily, while staring at the ground. I heard a cough in a distance. There was a person. I stared at her with disgust. Her skin was peeling. The stench that came from her was unbearable. She was a statue. She brought her hands out slowly.

“Change please. May I have some change.” I stared at her innocence, don’t do it, took out my wallet, don’t do it, and gave her several dollars. Why? She smiled with tears of joy.

“Thank you! Thank you!” She bursted out happiness, it made me feel a bit happy.

“No one comes around here, I prayed people to come here. You’re first in months. I glad you come.”

“What? There must be people that come up here!”

“No. No. No one come here.” Water drops began to fall off of this worn-down statue.

“No one come here… ever.” The look from this person is like an abandoned creature who just wants to survive. I know what I have to do. Don’t help this trash. I ignored the rotten voice. The voice inside is not me, I’m a separate being from this voice.

“Come here.” I took the lady, and put her on my back.

“Let’s take you to another location.” She was surprisingly light as a feather.

“What? No. No. I don’t need to.” I continued to carry her down.

“Why couldn’t you walk down to where the people are yourself?” The exhaustion was getting to me as I carried the lady down the hill.

“I don’t like people. They mean. They take everything from you. They... make me poor.” Carrying this lady down, I knew her feelings. I don’t understand why. I’ve been avoiding everyone, yet I understanded, and connected to her.

“Where we going?” I continued to carry her down, and find the Tasties employee.

“Hi, um, can you help this old lady out? She really needs cash to support herself.”

“Huh? Oh, well I find something, I’ll help out any customer that needs help.” The old lady started gaining a lot of money from the Tasties customers that were there. The lady filled the room with her tears, and gave me a hug.

“Thank you.” I head off, having the desire to visit my old realm which included my parents. The trip to my parents was quite unexpected. I encountered many people who needed help, and I assisted them.When I encountered the doorsteps of my parent’s house, it was quiet with the light of the moon shining bright down on me. I rang the doorbell, and saw the door open.

“Do you know what time it is? 3 AM! What are you doing here?” My mother immediately hugged me. This felt strange.

“I thought that now was a good time to visit you.”

“You’re crazy! I’ll talk to you in the morning, go rest in your room.” I walked into my room to find a nostalgia feeling. I’ve probably been through a lot in this room, all those memories shattered. I slept on the bed, until it was morning. When I woke up, the entire room felt lively. The walls brought a bright reflection. I got up, and noticed something strange. It was a photo of a man with glasses, and myself right beside him. I immediately remembered him from the alley way. I rushed down to my parents.

“Who is this guy!?” I pointed to the photo.

“He left that photo here after you moved out. Personally, I don’t too much of him. You need to really talk to him by yourself. He lives right next to you I believe.” I stood there with confusion.

“Um…”

“I told him to look out for you since you’re both friends.” I said my farewells to my parents even though they didn’t want me to leave just yet, and I traveled across the world to my place. The voice inside is constantly pressuring me to avoid it. I knocked on the door that was beside my apartment. He opened the door slightly, and I showed him the photo. He invited me inside his place, it looked similar to mine.

“Who are you?” Letting my curiosity pour on him. He sat down, and rubbed his glasses. He told me to sit down since it’s going to take a while.

“Well, first let me to you about myself. When I was young, I was raised poor, we really didn’t have the money to do anything. I would just played with sticks, and moved rocks with it. I thought that was amusing. During the school days, my parents would constantly force me to study, in hopes of getting me recognized to be successful. College came along, and because I didn’t have enough money, I didn’t go to the college that I wanted to go to. I went to a small community college, benefiting from loans. I offered out many advertisements for work, and got nothing until several guys showed up. They wanted their school work done, and would be willing to pay a good amount. From then on, I would always help out, and I gained sufficient cash. However, they wanted more work finished from me, and started to pay less. I didn’t feel like helping them anymore, they wouldn’t listen. They started to bully me, which soon led to disastrous torment every single day. It destroyed my entire life. I tried calling the police, but they just said they will be on the lookout. The men would never leave me alone. When you came along, you changed everything. You gave me a lot of ideas, inspiration, and courage. You stopped the men from getting me. I made a ton of mistakes, but you seem to know how to fix them. I wish you still had those memories.” He stared at the window, with droplets falling off him.

“Because of you, I was able to start up a business. Thank you.” He gave me a hug. The voice replied with a thank you.

“I’m sorry. Oh, and your mother told me I should watch over you, so I've been following wherever you went.” I left the place, and went into my apartment. I was exhausted, and fell asleep immediately.

“Farewell.”

Traveling in this corrupted world that only I can change, I walk down a road. This world needs me.

“Someone help me! That guy stole my purse!” She yelled. I ran to the thief, and toppled the man. However the force was so great, it made the man dropped the purse, which eventually fell into a sewer. I apologized to the woman, but she demanded me to get it out. I eventually did after many attempts. I offered my help at a recreational center. I served all the food, but was getting nausea from the smell of the food. I eventually threw up into one of the dishes. I was kicked from the recreational center. I will help this world despite my failures! I have the need to help others, I want others to be happy. My neighbors wanted some help from me. I walked four dogs, and I tied all of them to a pole. I went to get a bottle of water at the shop, and when I came out, the pole was gone. I looked all day for them, but I couldn’t find them, nor the pole. I was eventually hated by my neighbor. Rumors soon spread all around the city. I was unable to help anyone anymore. Walking through this city I’m desperately trying to help, I see a man who was getting beat up in the alley way. I rushed into the alley, and scared them off. There were people nearby, so they left.

“Are you alright?” I took out my hand. He refused.

“Just go away, this isn’t your problem.” I forced him up. He walked away, and I followed.

“Hey, you should be really cautious, the city can be a dangerous place.” I patted his back, and walked right beside him.

“I know, but I have no money. I need those guys to help me. I can’t get a job because no one ever hires me.”

“How about I help you out! You shouldn’t rely on those guys anymore, I have an interesting place for you to work at.” I showed him the Tasties restaurant. He didn’t like the idea, but talking to the manager, I managed to get him a spot. After that, he came to me every single day asking me for advice. I quickly gave him ideas, and bonded with him. I knew more of him, and helped out in any form I can. I gave him a pair of shoes because his old pair was torn. He handed me a big jacket. The men that were after him, soon faded away. I felt like I was actually needed for the first time. However, I soon find the men as I walked with the guy. They wanted him to do more work for him, I defended him. A strike was immediately blown towards me. I turned to see the man in the glasses, running away. The shoes I had given him, weren’t with him anymore. It was tossed aside. The men got me to the ground, and stroke more blows. The man continued to run away, without ever helping me back. I got back up, and limped away. People were observing this entertainment. Why didn’t they help? I continued to move on, I was pushed again towards something hard. Where was I? I felt myself moving. My mind was blank. Running away as fast as I can, the laughter was around. Hatred was evolving. I saw the world I despised so much for what it actually is.

I woke up in tears. This is a punishment rather than a blessing. I didn’t want it anymore. The voice… my voice… myself. I was helping myself to avoid all of this treachery. However, I remembered the old lady; how I saved her. How I need to look for people who actually needed the help. A world so corrupted, needs a savior in time. I will be the observer until I’m actually needed. I promptly put on my hood, and observed the world.