Published November 27, 2010
So I'm working on a funny retelling of Red Riding-hood for a contest but it's for school and this twist was just totally not school appropriate 
I hope you get a good laugh from it 
I promise that you'll never look at Grammy the same!
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After fighting past perverted wolves, wicked witches and sparkly vampires I finally made it! Who knew that the woods were filled with so many weirdos? Momma told me today that grandma was recovering from a surgery so we went to the store to pick out some ginger snaps, her favorites.
“Who’s there?”
“Grammy it’s me Little Red! Who else would bring cookies to the most awesome grandmother in the world? ”
“ Don’t come in! You can leave the cookies on the step and I’ll get them later.”
“Grammy is something wrong?”
“Well I was expecting another… guest who will be here soon”
“The doctor?”
“Umm… yes.”
“Oh silly Grammy! I’m as good as any doctor, I’m coming in.”
“No that’s really not necessary! Stop!” Boy I wish that I had listened….
“Grammy why are you so covered up? Where does it hurt?” Then I peeled back the covers and my eyes widened to the size of Snooki’s pouf.
“Little Red I am fine! Now go home!”
“But Grandmother what skimpy underwear you have!” I said being disgusted but concerned at the same time. You just should NOT wear certain articles of clothing past a certain age…
“ All the more comfortable to sleep in my child”
“And grandmother what big baloombas you have!” Is this the surgery that she had?
“All the better to get your attention with my child.”
“Well what’s your explanation for the hundred dollar bill on the night-stand?”
“That is… your Christmas present! See I wrapping your present and that’s why I didn’t want you to come in, I’m fine so you can go now! Merry Christmas dear.”
“But why are you in your underwear? And why did you get a boob-job?”
Knock Knock “Hello? Someone called for my services?” Yep… the morale of this story is that you should never EVER walk into your grandmother’s home uninvited. You never know what dirt you might find....
The End
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141,293 Literary Works • 674,334 Reviews
Hahaha. The name gave me a bit of a hint about the ending. Very perveted yet funny. Anyway I have some stuff to talk to you about!
There should be a comma where you see the red one there. When listing there is normally a comma before "and"
Example:
Annie ran over to the beach with Ron, Callie, and Sally.
Now, another thing to go over is, commas...again....
Commas are after and before names when someone is talking to them. If I said something like, "Alissa is a good kid" then it is not needed. Now if it was, "Alissa, you are so nice!" then a comma would be before "Alissa."
Did I confuse you?
Also if someone is being called "Silly, idiot, you fool, dear, or anything" there is a comma.
"Merry Christmas, dear"
Like that.
Oh, dear... I didn't confuse you, right? I hope I didn't...
Anyway, to wrap this up I'd like to say that you are creative and I hope to see more from you.
~Ladypurple.
Hmm well I didn't plan on it being the wolf but if you want to imagine that Grammy's sleeping with him then be my guest
HAHAHAHA! That was hilarious! The whole thing was just hilarious in general. Just to be sure, it was the wolf coming in at the end, right? I love the excuses. "The better to get your attention with"; sheer comedy genius! I wish there were more stories on YWS like this. And shame on your school for encouraging censorship!
Hello there
I think that's the only error I found.This was...interesting
Keep writing