Published March 25, 2012
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141,408 Literary Works • 674,390 Reviews
Your poem is great. It has the essence of being a dream, a bittersweet remembrance. Although the poem appears to be sweet, it has underlying tones of sadness and regret. It is as if you are remembering the bliss of childhood, and regreting your decision to leave it behind. It seems as though the first seven lines are missing punctuation, but that is the only error that I can find. I like the spaces you put between the stanzas; it gives the poem a clean look. Beautiful vocabulary! Over all, success!
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Wow, great poem! Thanks for the great read!
I can honestly find nothing I would tweak in this poem. The language is beautiful, and the whole thing has this haunting reminicent feeling. You could probably do something with this!